The Man In The Hat sits, as usual, at the center of the dais. To his left are Leelee Sobieski, Kesha, Jane Levy, Britney Spears, Jewel, and Grace Park. To his right sit Kat Dennings, Chloe Bennet, Daniela Ruah, Neve Campbell, Mariska Hargitay, and Avril Lavigne.

Man In The Hat: "All right, as usual, before we get to questions, there are some people I want to thank. Let's start with our good friends from Beever's Babes. Outside of Bazz, they've been here to Asylum as much as any stable, and, I suspect, that's not going to change. We have a good working relationship with them and we love to give exposure to girls from across the pond, so we look forward to having them back. Also, as usual, we had some great independent performers here tonight. They are the backbone of Asylum and will continue to be. Our friends at Bazz, who we've already mentioned, are THE regulars here, and that's not going to change, either. Thanks to them and Angie for helping make this card as exciting as it was. And, of course, last but not least, the FCBA Commission for sanctionin' these bouts and makin' Asylum possible. Now, questions. Cable Boy! Go!"

HBO Reporter: "6-0 tonight, 8-0 overall this week, plus a title. Pretty good start for Front Street in 2016..."

Man In The Hat: "Almost makes you want to take this into the clubhouse, doesn't it?"

(Laughter)

Man In The Hat: "Yes, it was a great start, but it's ONLY the start. We plan on havin' a big 2016 at Front Street, and we're on our way, no question of that. Cable Boy II. Go!"

Showtime Reporter: "Let's start with your welters. Antje got the ball rolling on pay-per-view and both Kesha and Leelee looked good tonight..."

Man In The Hat: "I think they both did, yes. Lewis is a big, strong girl who's really built herself into a welter, and, of course, Angie is the original Big Red, a smart veteran who still has plenty of power. Neither of those girls are tomato cans, and I think our two blondes handled those challenges pretty well. This week is just a first step back to welter, but, it's a good step. Brunette Magazine is here! Go ahead!"

Brunette Magazine Reporter: "Daniela, I think, has really been making a move in your lightweight division lately..."

Man In The Hat: "Daniela has fought extremely well for us at lightweight, and tonight was no exception. She's won eleven in a row and 16 of 18 at the weight, and the two losses were Lawrence and Joanne Kelly, two of the top lights in the FCBA. As you know, we have a crowded lightweight division here, and it's getting more crowded at the top, with Anna and Gemma, Katy, who's already won the belts for us, and now, of course, Brooke, who's currently the Unified Lightweight Champion. But, Daniela is not getting lost in all of that, because she's not allowing herself to get lost. She's got championship talent, and she proves it over and over again. Tess, dear. Go ahead."

Tess: "Let's talk about Jane Levy. I've said before that she might be your most impressive flyweight, and she was impressive again tonight."

Man In The Hat: "Jane is just exactly what you want in a fighter in every sense. Physically, she's a former college athlete with great feet and a ton of power for the weight. But, she's also very, very smart, both in the ring and out. She learns very quickly and she understands things a lot of girls with a lot more experience still don't get. Jane's our number four fly, just by virtue of still being in the developmental stage and being several years behind the rest of our girls in experience. But. That's going to change fairly soon, I suspect, because she's checking every box and answering every challenge and I am NOT surprised. Smackeroo. Dinner awaits..."

Reporter: "Let's talk about your two young bantams, Kat and Chloe. Bennet's sort of ..."

Man In The Hat(smiling): "Let me stop you. Chloe has developed very quickly, more quickly than any fighter we've ever had. More quickly than the vast majority of fighters in the history of the FCBA. She's on the edge of being a contender after just 13 fights, and you saw why tonight. The young lady can do just about anything you need to do in the ring, and she's just getting better every time out. But. I'm gonna warn all of you in this audience NOT to sleep on Kat Dennings. Yes, Kat's been up and down. Well. That's the natural order of things. That's how fighters develop. Chloe is the exception, not the rule. Let me give you an example of the rule. Another girl named Katherine...except, she spells it Katheryn. We call her Katy. We had PLENTY of ups and downs with Ms. Perry, and she was 30 fights in before it came together against Upton. She hasn't looked back since. Ryan, Helfer, Wagner, Theron, Strahovski and the lightweight title. Nine of ten at the weight. Number one contender. And, before you ask, NO..."

(Laughter)

Man In The Hat: "Kat Dennings has beaten good fighters, Wilkinson twice, Frege, Church, Seydoux in one freakin' ROUND, and she's lost to some good ones, too, Lohan, Olsen, Silk, Flanagan, Spiridakos. It's gonna happen for her. This girl has all the tools she needs to be a champion. It's coming together. The last pieces will fit. And, when they do, she's gonna be a contender, too. Count on it. Now. Dinner time. Tess! Smackey! Limo!"