St. Patrick's Day Massacre (2016)
Minka Kelly versus Jenny McCarthy
(Words: Bazz & Vassago/ Results: Lookout!)

It’s located on Prospect St. in Hartford, Connecticut where the Irish are far from extinct. It’s an old building like most of the others and old buildings in New England mean built in the mid 1800s or earlier. It’s not on the tony end of the long avenue that separates the Hollow from the west end.

Regardless, if you’ve lived in Hartford for more than a half hour you’ve thrown a mug down at County Sligo, named after the county located in the northwestern corner of Catholic Ireland. Darkened windows protect the interior from the outside world or as many claim keep the outside world from seeing whatever happens inside. The front door is dark wood engraved with the county’s coat of arms, a book opened with the Celtic cross and a red rose, underneath a boar’s head and then the words “Land of Heart’s Desire”, the county’s motto.

Inside there’s sawdust on the floor mixed with peanut shells. The bar is long and made from dark mahogany. Behind it are two huge athletic looking men with gnarled hands from years of hard labor amongst other endeavors, noses that haven’t been straight since grade school and muscles strong to the bone. They smile for the women and give off all the personality of undertakers when taking an order from a man. This is a dive bar made by Irishmen for Irishmen. There is no separation between the bar room and the large area where workers and insurance executives come and eat side by side. Today all the tables and most of the chairs have been removed. There’s another purpose for the large expanse of floor.

From the back of the room an extremely blonde woman steps up to the bar and hops up onto a stool. She’s dress in baggy carpenter dungarees and a green tee shirt. She stares straight ahead for a full minute while the two bartenders eye her up and down. Suddenly she nods her head towards the one built like he may have spent his rugby career as a hooker or possibly a muscular wing forward and he steps up to her.

“Get me a Jamisons, the 18 year old stuff and get one for her down there.” Blondie orders with a flash of her blue eyes.

“Sure thing young lady.” The bartender responds as he reaches back and grabs a bottle.

“Young lady. I like that. What’s your name?” The blonde asks.

“Barney. What’s yours?” The bartender is looking down as he pours the short drinks hiding a big grin.

“You know who I am.” She almost barks back quickly toning it down as she gets a glimpse of the man’s immense forearm.

He puts the shots on the deck and then takes one down to the woman about a dozen feet away. Like the blonde she’s in jeans, these have holes in the knees and at one side at her hip and a green and white tee shirt with a picture of Ed Adams in the front. “This is on your friend over there.”

“She’s not my friend…but I’ll take it.” The shapely brunette responds.

The two girls pick up their drinks and hold them up to each other. They give each other a nod and down them, throwing the glasses down on the bar. Suddenly a blast of fury dashes out of the kitchen door in the back and whisks its way amongst the growing crowd that has assembled for the day’s events. It’s what the blonde would call a pesky flyweight and this one is the queen of all peskiness. After saying her hellos to individuals in the crowd she darts over to the bar with her signature quick gate. She pulls back a chair and pops up onto it with the agility of an Olympic gymnast. She gives the girls, one on each side of her a look.

“Hellooooo JMac! How’s tricks?” Cassie Scerbo inquires. “Minka! How’s it going.”

“Not as well as before you showed up half pint! What are you doing here? I didn’t invite you. You didn’t invite her did you?” Jenny McCarthy sneers down at Minka Kelly.

“The proverbial thorn in your side? I wish I had thought of it but I didn’t.” Minka has a broad grin on her face.

“No actually it’s the commissioner that asked me to stop by and handle a job for him. So I accepted.” Scerbo looks up at McCarthy with a taunting grin.

“What! Did! He! Say! You! Could! Do!” McCarthy is now apoplectic.

“It’s nothing important your highness. You’ll be fine.” Cassie responds and then turns to the larger of the bartenders. “Elmo could I get a glass of my veggie shake?”

Elmo smiles for the first time all day and reaches out and grabs a quart container and pours out a purplish liquid into a small glass sliding it over to the flyweight. Cassie Scerbo knocks it back and returns the glass to Elmo and then hops off her chair.

“Ta ladies, Elmo, Barney.” Cassie bids her adieu and heads back into the crowd which is quickly testing the building’s capacity.

I’ve watched her in a couple of fights. Pretty underrated. I like her style.” Elmo returns to his folded arms pose.

“Good thing. When I played hooker for the Eagles we made a trip to Scotland and played their national team. Her boss was a monster. An absolute monster on that team.” Barney replies loud enough for the two FCBA fighters to hear.

“Poindexter! Oh yeah he could put a hurtin on anyone on a rugby pitch. Still I’m taking her in a war. She’s just that diabolical.” Elmo chuckles causing his fellow bartender to laugh out loud in a rare display of levity for the two.

The two Bantams move away from the bar signaling that whatever is scheduled is about to happen. An announcer joins with some bouncers as big and brutal looking as Elmo and Barney push the crowd back creating a rough cut boxing square. The two women step in surrounded by FCBA managers like Poindexter Del Crunchy and The Wiz and those of the two fighters, Screej and Vassago, the commissioner himself making a rare public appearance and reporters like Ace Acealot, Ira Fishbine, Tess Valmore and one Bartholomew Tullamore Dew Alahandro Hay and of course a contingent of FCBA fighters mixed in with a throng of Hartford’s best citizens ranging from pipefitters making the trip up from Electric Boat, insurance underwriters and the blue blooded wealthy.

“Alright! Alright! Welcome all to the annual FCBA St Paddy’s Day Massacreeee!” The announcer bellows out over the din of the crowd. In this corner an absolute blonde assassin none other than JENNY MCCARTHY! And in this corner yet another FCBA bantam champion MINKA KELLY!”

The crowd is howling with excitement. Barney and Elmo are working as hard as they can passing out beers and drinks all relating to all things Irish. And the girls are already circling each other with bad intent.

“Let me introduce the referee for this event! She’s one of the more talented fighters in the FCBA that has volunteered to hold this event below the level of a complete riot. A wise choice because she is actually responsible for starting almost half the riots that have occurred in North America over the last 5 years. CASSANDRA LYNN SCERBO!

McCarthy is immediately at center ring screaming at the top of her lungs and gesticulating for the commissioner to get involved. “OH NO I WON”T! THIS AIN’T RIGHT!” is heard over and over from her side. Yet in mid yelp the bell rings and the fight is on.

Round 1:
When Irish pride is on the line, one should never expect Jenny Mac taking it easy... however the blonde becomes too erratic trying to take Minka's head off inside the opening minute and she pays for it dearly when the brunette ducks all the high jabbing and riffles a right hook on the jaw followed by a vicious strike to the nose... that opens the blonde's eyes wide as Minka blows her a quick kiss and resumes the facial assault shutting one of the most obnoxious fighters ever to grace the ring out in close range... heavy onslaught from Minka targets the blonde's face up the middle and Jenny's butt sways back & forth as she tries to adjust her footing but keeps turning the wrong way and eats a handful of Kelly's left hooks before she finally realizes she fights a left-handed opponent... too late to salvage the round anymore but a quick escape allows Mackster to avoid serious battle scars so early in this fight - even though that exposes her lack of recent action and makes Minka look rather supreme - like a current bantamweight champion actually should be!

Between 1 & 2 As the round ends Referee Cassie Scerbo blows Minka Kelly the second kiss of the fight and gets a wink from the bantam champ in return. It’s only a gesture of good will from the pesky flyweight turned ref not a sign of partisanship as the boozy crowd watched her do a good job running a fair fight. She broke up a couple of clinches where Jenny Mac was getting the worse of things and generally kept a usually chaotic boxing exhibition moving along.

“I have to say I think that Cassie’s running a very good fight. I didn’t know that she had it in her to be fair, decent and unbiased.” One Bartholomew Les Petit Gendarme Alahandro Hay comments to Tess Valmore.

“She’s actually taken the FCBA official referee qualification course. She is able to ref any FCBA sanctioned fight and how many times do I have to remind you of her ability to hear things that only a dog would? The last thing you need is another year of walking around wearing another order of salmon fish and chips.” Tess both informs and warns her boyfriend.

“Wow! An actual sanctioned referee!” Smackey considers the horrifying reality of a number of FCBA fights being controlled by Cassandra Lynn Scerbo.

“And I think she looks smashing in the black and white jumper with those black matador pants! She’s as cute as a button!” An obvious fan, Mrs. Regina Worth-Worthington, the former lifestyle editor for The Sunday Times gushes in between heavy noshes of a sizeable corned beef and cabbage sandwich.

“And as quick and deadly as a cornered wolverine.” Smackey finishes as softly as he can.

Round 2:
Minka arrives in close range a little too flamboyant and Jenny does her best impression of Her Royal Bendiness Summer Glau by fending off the initial jabbing series before blasting a cross hook on the mouth to gain the brunette's attention. A mindless leather bash through the middle stacks Kelly up in the center of the ring and by the time she gathers her thoughts, Mac riffles an epic jabbing series on the temples and sways the current champ back & forth into a sagging reality... but Jenny just can't land that haymaker put away to complete her comeback as she skims off Minka's shoulder and enables her to bide some time in a hectic clinch. Mac loses her temper and scowls into the brunette's ear asking if she's ready to give up and this time there's no laughing response from Minka who desperately wants to shake the older lass off but gets wrestled to the ropes instead and the ref has a hard time separating these two at the bell... Irish tempers flare after six minutes as both hellcats accuse each other of watching too many Nikki Bella tapes in the last few days...

Between 2 & 3 By now the crowd has become a bit more loose and well lubricated by the refreshments being served by Bartenders Elmo and Barney. A crowd has grown to the size of busting out the walls of the establishment and keeping any kind of boxing ring dimensions in place. Meanwhile Cassie Scerbo and a cadre of Hartford’s best Irish bouncers are doing their best to keep a space while the fighters retreat to their rather nomadic corners. The bar has become an impromptu meeting of some of the main boxing club managers. They sit on stools at the bar in order Vassago, Screej, Poindexter Del Crunchy, The Wiz, Marvin Fox and Ginny, taking up a good portion of the best seats in the house.

“Let’s get another round over here Barney! I’m parched!” Pointy barks at the muscular bartender.
“What you are is on your way to getting hammered! This pace makes Kip Keino look like a slow poke!” Ginny admonishes her drinking partner as guffaws and chuckles erupt from the others.

“All in a day’s work Madam! All in a day’s work!” Pointy hands over the drinks owed to those to his right, a PBR for The Wiz, an Irish Car Bomb for Marvin Fox and a rather effervescent but powerful drink that Ginny has become enamored with called a Banana Kaboom. This particular drink coming with a rather dour warning from the bartenders.

Round 3:
No more smiles and giggles in the ring as we're into SERIOUS business... Jenny barks in anger as she fails to split Minka's gloves with her initial charge  but escapes the looping overhand response before targeting the brunette's rack in a hectic effort to assume control in close range... Minka doesn't anticipate that change and gets bumped off to her heels; before she can properly react there's a lighting quick left cross thumping her on the mouth and making Mac yell out in delight... AND THERE'S MORE BLONDE WRATH TO FOLLOW... Jenny rolls back some years in heavy body assault that leaves Kelly aching and applying a tight earmuff but she just can't avoid getting pummelled back to the ropes with Mackster all over her gut and laying it flat out until the brunette gurgles in disarray and leans over the ropes allowing her Irish nemesis to strike from point-blank range and punish the solar plexus... "Take that... and THAT!!!", Jenny gets all vocal but she dwarfs Kelly's resistance even without the extra boost of confidence... she traps Minka on the turnbuckle and keeps hazing her to the body UNTIL THE CHAMP HAS TO TAKE A KNEE amid painful scowls... Ugh! Jenny the Mauler is back... Irish Pride or not... Jug twerking from the blonde veteran delays the count but doesn't save Minka from the humiliating experience... she gets up at seven and looks angry more than actually hurt however the Mackster mocking hits higher gear as Jenny demands Minka to QUIT NOW or face the consequences... "You've had too much Valmore in your ear lately!", the champ fires back and vows NEVER to listen to the blonde's comments on the monthly Asylum show, "Where's the mute button when you need it? This is just a start...", suddenly the clock expires in the middle of all the verbal antics and someone needs to remind Jenny that her usual word battles with Jenny O'Dell are still a fortnight away! Despite the knockdown, Minka looks fresh enough to make a comeback and that's the main reason to worry about for the Illinois blonde.

Between 3 & 4 Jenny Mac vs Minka Kelly not the only drama taking place in the raucous bar. Cassie Scerbo brushing off some errant splashes of beer accidentally sloshed into the ring from a boisterous group of underwriters from Whatsamatta Mutual Life and Reinsurance Company exchanges laser like stares with both Vanessa Hudgens on one side of the ring and Jessica Lowndes on the other. Flyweight repugnance running deep even at a bantamweight fight.

“I have to say that this corned beef is scrumptious! Almost as good as what Bridget Regan served us at the last Bazz press conference!” Mrs. Worth-Worthington comments.

“I can’t wait for mine to show up! Oh here it is! Yippee!” Tess Valmore’s anticipation of a heavy dose of eating has reached a feverish pitch. Just as Barney is handing out plates of sandwiches and cabbage to Ira Fishbine, one Bartholomew Leprechaun Tights Alahandro Hay the last plate, a supersized portion of corned beef due for Tess Valmore’s hands is lifted away by a rather goonish looking annuity salesman from Garbagebreath Annuities. He gives the seated reporters a rather aggressive smile giving them a hideous look at his meat filled teeth.

“Hey that’s mine!” Tess announces as Smackey stands up to make an attempt at retrieving her plate.

“Forget about it! It’s mine and there’s not much you or your skinny boyfriend can do about it!” The somewhat large and more importantly somewhat out of shape salesman reports.

“What about me ya tubby ingrate. How about I drag yar fat ass out the back door and give ya the beating of yar life!” Barney fed up with all the chaos has decided to jump into the fray but suddenly there’s a shadow engulfing the entire area. It’s Poindexter Del Crunchy standing right in front of the now very frightened annuity scavenger discovering that his transgression has not only drawn the ire of a very physically capable bartender but the largest man he’s ever seen. They’re face to face and Pointy doesn’t look happy. If this is a non too subtle hint that the large side of beef should give up the corned beef dinner the hand underneath his chin that slowly pushes him up into the air is the clincher.

Suddenly there’s a loud smack and then the sound of a body dropping to the floor. One of the salesman’s partner’s in indexed annuities has made a somewhat feeble attempt at throwing a sucker punch Pointy’s way but has been intercepted by a charging Ginny. The Academy management lands an overhand right to the jaw that sends the drunken buffoon to an early demise.

“That’ll teach ya you foooockan hewar!” Ginny ends her proclamation with a breathy giggle as she stumbles into her follow through a bit affected by the growing number of Banana Kabooms.

For a moment both Pointy and Barney stand stunned at Ginny. After a moment the large Scot throws the annuity salesman with one arm into the crowd of fellow annuitants and Barney announces another Banana Kaboom for The Academy’s manager who rolls her eyes at the thought of another one of those concoctions flowing down her gullet.

“Well it’s obvious that you do more than just stand around with a whistle at your training sessions lassie!” Pointy gives the fellow manager a slap on the back and leads her back to the bar.

Round 4:
Irish pride hits neutral for Minka who tries to bide some time early in the fourth - very un-champ like BUT one should never treat Jenny Mac like any other ordinary blonde... Mackster can't believe her luck in open play as she pummels the slow moving brunette to maintain the high spirits but smells a trap in the middle of all this Kelly back-tracking... a costly mistake from the vet as Minka really tries to weather the knockdown storm and the opportunity goes begging... by the time McCarthy opens up from both sides, she has Kelly thumping her in response and despite the mindless bash attempts, she can't repeat the previous heroics and allows Minka to recharge her batteries come the final minute... too late to salvage the slow start to the contest but Minka's a wily veteran herself and doesn't mind wasting a single round for a higher stake.

Between 4 & 5 The crowd literally swaying back and forth both from the rhythm of “When Irish Eyes Are Smiling” playing between rounds and the weight of copious amounts of booze having been consumed. Referee Cassie Scerbo has taken up position just to the side of Jenny Mac’s corner. It doesn’t take long to see that the two blondes are talking back and forth. Cassie is looking straight ahead trying to be subtle with a smile etched on her face while Jenny sneers out of the side of her mouth while her corner works out the kinks. Suddenly McCarthy erupts with a litany of descriptive phraseology regarding Cassie’s flyweight like size, “Why you half pint pipsqueak short stack!” and on and on it went until Jenny McCarthy lunges off her stool. “I did not throw any low blows!” Cassie skips out of the way with ease and at the same time signals for the two fighters to come together for the next round much to the delight of Minka Kelly who has been fully enjoying the scene happening in the opposite corner.

Round 5:
Jenny goes for broke but why didn't this happen in the fourth? Minka's back to her agile herself and keeps the prancing blonde under her glove... left glove that is... repeated strikes from the preferred side leave Jenny's face bruised on the minute mark and even the Sceej veteran doesn't come to embrace those hard shots just yet... UNTIL MINKA BLOWS HER LIPS TO CHOPS with a high tempo laser-like double strike that sends Mackster into a tailspin... "Why you little...", blonde anger in overflow but meets a proper match in more brunette fire power.... Minka leans on the front (right) leg and keeps thumping Jenny's face to extreme, securing a valuable mental break in the proccess. Blonde's scowls and angry fits won't do this time as she gets SILENCED with a belting hook to the liver for a good measure and begins to call out Jenny O'Dell for much needed coaching advice... This ain't Philly though and Minka seeths in her eyes at the bell enforcing more champion authority!

Between 5 & 6 Having had his fill of corned beef and cabbage and enjoyed the advantage of knowing one very large Scotsman and a very rough looking bartender, Barney, one Bartholomew El Machismo Alahandro Hay, unlike all the other St Paddy’s days covering the FCB A, seems to be making it through this St Paddy’s Day fiasco intact. This prospect is deeply imperiled when the annuity salesman re-emerges right in front of Smackey.

“Hey that was one big hombre. He your friend?” The beefy and clearly inebriated boozehound inquires in a slurry voice.

“Ugh yeah. He played rugby for Scotland a few years ago.” Smackey plays up Pointy’s resume while he thinks to himself ‘I was so close to making it through this annual most horrific of days and now I’m going to get mauled by a man shaped like a bear.’

“Lifted me up in the air like a wet rag. Don’t worry, as long as he’s around you’re okay with me. Besides I was out of line with your girl’s corned beef. By the way if you don’t mind me saying that girl can eat. I mean competition like eating.” The salesman is smiling at Smackey as if all past transgressions have been forgotten.

“Yeah, she’s known for that.” A much more relaxed Smackey responds.

“Well what I was thinking about was a financial plan for you two...”

‘Oh sweet Lord no! I’m getting pitched for an insurance product! Where was Scerbo when she’s truly needed! I’d rather have the beatdown! Oh please just punch me and end this!’ The thoughts going through Smackey’s mind had become complete and utter panic.

Round 6:
Bad times for Jenny Mac continue, the relentless pursuit from the rallying champion leaves her with more facial cuts when Minka clobbers some leather over the top and sags the blonde on her heels amid more angry O'Dell cursing... more problems to embrace the orthodox left-handed stance and Kelly's fitness level must impress even the BLONDE! Magazine reporters... the secret of all the championship hopefuls north side of 30 - even at bantamweight scale... Meanwhile Jenny huffs & puffs herself into temporary safety - the clinching zone earns her a series of uppercuts to break free and Minka cracks a left hook on the lips to make the blonde swallow some unwanted red liquor... a last-ditch effort to prevent the landslide defeat in this round goes awry as Jenny puts too much faith on her offense against a current champion after all and gets countered to the body; Minka even allows herself punishing some fine blonde jug before blasting the older Irish competitor straight into her corner with a nasty uppercut on the jaw... Jenny loses her stamina fast and now basically lets in everything thrown at her... the oddmakers will be over the moon they predicted a gassing out demise for the Illinois native.

Between 6 & 7 The Academy manager has stood on her stool at the bar and begun directing the crowd in the singing of “Oh Dannyboy”. It’s clear that amongst the FCBA managers, some of whom are attending their first St Paddy’s Day event, any hope of setting examples as management have been cast aside long ago. Pointy and Vassago have formed a sort of human net underneath Ginny in hopes that they will be able to catch the makeshift choir director not if but when she falls off the bar stool. Odds are only about even for success as they each have combined their lifesaving duties with the chore of downing a plethora of Murphy’s Stout. Meanwhile Bonzo, The Wiz and Screej are in the middle of an intense discussion regarding the smaller fighters and all things flyweight, at this point not much of it making sense anymore.

“I have to say that I’m very glad to have the welters making a comeback. The less we see of those little girls spanking each other the better! I know that you fellas have made your investments into the Flys but to me there’s nothing like a couple of welters in a real brawl.” Bonzo opines just before the Wiz can stop him to save himself.

Suddenly Bonzo senses that he’s being watched and turns to see every flyweight in the facility staring at him with daggers. Even through the terribly off pitched singing and other caterwauling filling the big room with a high decibel it seems as if those from the deadliest weight class have honed in on his remark. Everytime Bonzo blinks it seems as if the flyweights get closer.

“Oh save yourself before it’s too late Bonzo get yourself over the bar!” Vassago exclaims from his Ginny support position.

“You’ll get no help against those crazy girls back here!” A very scared Elmo yells back from behind the bar as the flyweights close in on Bonzo like a pack of hyenas on a gazelle carcass.

“What’s you just say?” Cassie Scerbo quite expectedly is the first to make it to Bonzo standing on a dining room chair to make an eye to eye confrontation possible.

Every manager at the bar stands in abject horror at what might happen when Bonzo, no stranger to mental agility says “Why I was offering a round of drinks…er I mean drinks for the rest of the night for the flyweights on me!”

This seems to break the revolt as Hudgens, Lowndes, Panettiere, and Selena “Gomey” Gomez make a beeline for the bartenders ordering all sorts of incredibly expensive drinks on the very relieved Bonzo. Meanwhile Scerbo grabs three Irish whiskey shots on a tray and returns to the ring with the refreshments aimed for the two fighters and herself.

Round 7:
The Mackster needs a breather - or Allison Mack stepping in for relief - but there's no chance of that happening tonight and Minka goes full monty with a facial breeze that wipes even the snarky look from the Playboy's finest... "We're not in 1993 anymore but Donnie won't like that either!", Minka rubs more vocal insult to the blonde's badly swollen lips... and Jenny crumbles under the aerial attack... This ain't the 1985 Bears defence for sure as Jenny gets stacked up on her heels and drops her guard under a Los Angeles stamped offense... Minka riffles right through her Irish foe's face and bangs her towards the ropes where Mac assumes the training dummy gear and just allows the brunette to enforce all the St. Paddy's wrath... ALL AT ONCE... and we cal call our Asylum friend Kesha to sing the "Timber" tune now... Jenny's eyes bawl out to the Irish orbit under the relentless leather rush... LA stamped, championship stamped... no way back for your blonde's finest... the knees simply give way under the barrage and McCarthy slides down on her pretty ass with eyes closed..   "Guess you won't be using the lipstick for quite a while now?", Minka glares over the fallen foe for a little while admiring the demo job she did on Mac's lips... "Perhaps they will have to find a replacement for the next Asylum broadcast too?" Whatever the case, the  Irish Pride triumphs in numbers tonight... KO7 Minka Kelly!!!

After: The first object visible to Jenny McCarthy when she opens her eyes is one Cassandra Lynn Scerbo smiling down at her from a crouching position her hands on her knees.

“Are we still in the count?” A groggy Jenny McCarthy asks hopefully from her seated position against a bar chair.

“We sure are! But I’m up to 89 if you must know! It’s all over big Mac & Cheese!” Cassie reports back to her announcing partner.

Meanwhile the rest of the crowd including Minka Kelly and her entourage have moved on to the bar area where Irish oriented drinks are flowing at an ungodly pace. Scerbo holds out her hand and helps up the extremely disheveled blonde fighter. McCarthy rubs her head where the punches landed the hardest which is basically everywhere. She’s a mere shadow of her former self and to make matters worse it’s Cassie Scerbo that’s bringing her back to reality.

“I know that you think I’m doing this for pure enjoyment and you are partly right but this is for your own good!” Scerbo takes a pitcher of ice water and pours it down McCarthy’s neck.

McCarthy jumps around like a boated fish for a few moments and then turns to Cassie and says. “You know I don’t care what they say Short Stack, you’re a hell of a gal.”

“Well it’s mostly you that says that stuff but I’ll take the compliment for what it’s worth, the rantings of a barely conscious woman.” Cassie returns just as Minka Kelly returns with a beer for each of her St Paddy’s Day contributors.

Later in the evening as Elmo announces that one more memorable holiday has come and gone and that County Sligo is no longer available as a boozing oasis The Wiz’ limo pulls away from the city of Hartford moving west on I-84. Inside are all of the managers, most are in the process of or have passed out, a side effect of so much frivolity. Poindexter Del Crunchy and The Wiz are still awake chirping away like a couple of magpies discussing all things FCBA as Reggie drives down the highway with his trusty navigator in the front seat with him. Cassie Scerbo makes up an itinerary of drop offs at various mansions between Hartford and Philadelphia as well as a couple of private airports where wealthy managers can be dropped off appropriately.

PS: Despite her incredible display of energy at County Sligo, Ginny had to be carried, funeral procession style, to her home where some young maid collected her at the front door.