O'Dell: "You are looking LIVE at the sold out Asylum Arena in Philadelphia! I'm Jennifer O'Dell, and I'm here along with Tess Valmore, The Bad Girl Of Bazz and the FCBA's Unified Flyweight Champion, Cassie Scerbo, and The Loose Cannon Of The FCBA, The Straw That Stirs The Drink, Jenny McCarthy, and ladies, we have a great card to wrap up the month of August..."



Tess: "That's right, Jenny, and a third of that action will take place in the welterweight division and involve one of the two guest stables appearing tonight, Beever's Babes. The Babes will be represented by Cat Deeley, who'll return to Asylum to battle the newest member of Front Street, Antje Utgaard, and by Rihanna, who'll make her debut here in Philly in a rematch with Kesha!"



Cassie: "And, that's a big fight for Kesha, who's coming off a huge win over Moon Bloodgood. And, speaking of big fights, we'll have one at flyweight, where former JMD Champion Jennette McCurdy will battle Leighton Meester, as Meester tries to follow up on her big win over Brenda Song."



McCarthy: "I'm not surprised neither of you two have mentioned the absolute TRAGEDIES of justice we have at bantamweight, featuring that phony Pink, who ducked me for years, and will be trotting out there against a girl without a single FCBA win AND without management, Monica Raymund..."



Tess: "Um, Monica is making her FCBA DEBUT tonight, so..."



McCarthy: "Stop interrupting, Walmart! But, even THAT isn't as big a tragedy as that absolute FRAUD Allison Mack fighting ANOTHER girl without an FCBA win, Natalie Martinez!"



Cassie: "And, those won't be the only bantamweight bouts tonight, because Bazz's own Tracy Spiridakos is here for a rematch with Leven Rambin!"



O'Dell: "As I said, it's going to be a good one, six fights, three weight classes, two guest stables, and lord knows how may opportunities to hammer back a shot of the hard stuff, so get those shot glasses and bingo cards ready, sit back, relax, and enjoy 'The Babes Are Back At The Asylum'!"