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12 October 2016 Lindsey Pelas vs Keeley Hazell

Page history last edited by Vassago 6 years, 10 months ago

 

JMD(D) QUEENDOM IV: HALLOWEEN HAVOC

 

Posted by Los Ingobernales on October 12, 2016, 5:46 pm

 

 
Lindsey Pelas v Keeley Hazell (JMD) by simgrrl/result: Lookout!
Pelas: 25yo, 5'3# 105#, 32F-22-31, 1-1; 1KO vs. Hazell: 30yo, 5'6# 117#, 32F-24-32, 3-8; 2KO


Before: Pelas in just her 3rd fight (1-1) at 25 yrs old; Hazell her 12th (3-8) at 30 yrs! Clearly, Hazell has an edge in both height (3#) and weight (10#)! Both sporting massive, heavyweight bosom's which are rated as ìevenî - by the people hired to look into those things for the FCBA!

But where Hazell has the clear advantage is in experience. Among her 11 fights, Keeley has faced Katy Perry (2x), Adriana Lima, Claire Danes, Gemma Atkinson, Laura Pausini, Kendra Wilkinson, Jennifer Ellison, Rhian Sugden and Kat Dennings.

Pelas' only two opponents have been Ariel Winter (AW's first fight ever) and Kim Kardashian, a veteran. Pelas, to her credit, battled the wily KK on even terms thru four rounds, but it all came apart (literally) in the fifth round when KimK shredded Lindsey's top. Then the blonde made a rookie mistake, catching her free swinging breast and forgetting all about defense!

What followed was a Master Class taught to the young blonde on the subject ìprotect yourself at all timesî by Professor Obvious. In the space of two rounds, Pelas was knocked down twice, her bra busted open twice, then in the 8th - and final - round, her bra once more gave up the ghost leaving her unprotected bosom to be pounded flat before Kardashian (mercifully) knocked her blonde down for the third time...and O-U-T!

That beating came at the hands (fists) of a fighter, Kim Kardashian, with twice as many fights as Hazell, but less than twice as many wins. All of Hazell's fights have either been officially JMD - or the BBU equivalent, given that all 'big bust boxers' in the BBU take their racks very seriously!

So there's concern on the part of the 'Pelas Posse' about what their favorite may be in for stepping up in 'class' against another tough veteran 'bosom boxer' like Keeley. Still, Lindsey remains quietly confident - a confidence her friends and fans hope is not misplaced.

Pelas in pink bandeau top; hip-hugging boy-cut shorts; white gloves/shoes; blond hair pulled back and secured with a pink scrunchie. Hazell back to the white bikini she wore to crush Sam Cooke; blood red gloves and hi-top 'black as her heart' shoes!
* * * *
During R1: Pelas charges out all full of 'piss & vinegar'...and runs into a brunette buzz saw in Hazell who pretty much has her way with the busty rookie for the full three minutes! Only things missing were: 1) a knockdown, and 2) Pelas' top giving way. Otherwise, the fans might as well have been sitting thru a re-run of Pelas-Kardashian, but without the Kardashian class (ouch)! Pelas' puppies being bounced around like DD beach volleyballs at the Rio Olympics, but without the Olympic class (DDouble ouch!)
Fans on the edge of their seats eager for a last minute comeback by Lindsey are disappointed as she continues to get worked by Hazell with a veteran's savvy; not giving the youngster a moment to catch her breath as she continues her bell-to-bell beating of the young blonde. Bell: Pelas wandering lost, gets a theatrical 'boot in the butt' from Keeley to the delight of the crowd. Pelas, head hung in shame, shambles to her stool and flops with breathless sigh where she gets a right proper 'talking to' from her handlers. Hazel wins the round (wwwwwwwide!!!!!) without a knockdown.

R2: And the beat goes on! Hazell using her height/weight to full advantage this round, getting on top of petite little Pelas and staying in the saddle like the bare bronc champ at the Wyoming Finals Rodeo! Pelas putting up resistance in spots, but then being rolled up and puppy-punched back onto the ropes where Hazell has her way with Lindsey's ìladiesî and her mid-section. Pelas demonstrating her 'grit' if not a lot of boxing skill, with Keeley hammering those awesome Pelas' pups with both hands. A lot of Hazell holding Lindsey's head with her left and smashing her abs with the right as the ìrefereeî (note quotes?) stands around admiring Pelas' lush lady parts jumping and jiggling. It's not a pretty sight (unless you're a Hazell fan, and the few of them at ringside are having a ball thru two rounds!) Keeley again wins the round, but with less offensive firepower and in the face of more Pelas resistance this time, which only made it (close) rather than another landslide.

R3: Maybe it's age; perhaps conditioning; but this round begins with a brief offensive by Pelas, her first sustained showing of any spirit in the fight so far. After landing several hard body shots, Pelas tries head-hunting and quickly finds it not to her liking as she is forced to stand upright on her tip-toes to reach Keeley's chin! Exposing her torso to a veteran like Hazell is a recipe for disaster, as she finds when Keeley tee's off on her taa-taa's! Hazell rampaging to Pelas' torso midway battering her boobies around the ring as the smaller, lighter, blonde can't come up with an answer.
Late in the round, Hazell running on fumes, is rocked by an overhand right from Pelas who then snuggles up with her forehead in Keeley's overflowing bra to pound away at Hazell's belly button (and below!) Keeley Hazell being wrecked to the body by Pelas' two-fisted attack, forced to clinch up high around Lindsey's head while Pelas' concentrates on the waistband of Hazell's bottoms! Good, close, back-forth action perceived a draw by the judges, but the fans were vocally all-in on Pelas!

R4: IF round three marked the start of Pelas 'comeback', then we can say ìthe comeback continues.î Lindsey again comes out aggressively, only this time when Hazell fires back, they exchange punches more or less evenly. Hazell uses reach to her advantage at long range, and weight when she gets in close to Pelas, making it hard on the 3î shorter and 10+ pounds lighter Pelas.
At least Lindsey has youth (and probably conditioning) because as the fourth round winds down, Pelas' punch rate is increasing while Hazell's throwing fewer and fewer punches.... and she's being hit more! Pelas looking like a different fighter when she can unleash on her opponent and at the bell, it's Hazell who's backing up while Pelas is surging forward! It's a second consecutive close round, but this one has a totally different feel than the previous one and the fighters 'body language' shows it as Hazell slumps onto her stool while Pelas is sitting up grinning and soaking up praise from her corner (close).

R5: Cue 'Comeback Keeley'! Hazell looking far from “done” as she comes out more aggressively than she's shown in the last three rounds, taking the fight to Pelas who is almost blown off her feet several times in the first thirty seconds of the round! Hazell catching Lindsey on the left temple with a Right Cross in the opening moments, then as the young blonde struggles to clinch to buy time to recover, a hard Left Hook nearly unhinges her knees. There's no faking by Pelas who wraps her arms around Keeley's chest and presses her cheek to Keeley's F-cups as she tries to avoid giving the raging brunette another clean shot at her. Referee standing by uselessly as Pelas bogs Hazell down... at one point, holding onto the rope behind Keeley as Hazell struggles in vain to free herself from Lindsey's fanatical grasp.
By the time the penny falls and the referee slaps at Pelas' hands and calls on her to break, Pelas has mostly recovered her senses and quickly ducks under a hasty, and poorly timed, Left Hook by Keeley who tried to catch her unaware. Pelas spins out and bounces away, leaving Hazell behind her on the ropes. Lindsey dances around the ring with Keeley in red-faced pursuit, furious at being shown up by this ìbeginnerî while Lindsey runs and avoids engaging, making Hazell wear herself out in fruitless pursuit.
Down the stretch, Pelas again engages, ducking inside to hammer away at Hazell's torso, targeting that suspect mid-section while forgoing the to biggest, and most obvious, targets right there staring her in the face! Huffing and puffing, Hazell stubbornly continues to try to close with Pelas who either strafes her body with quick hit-and-run attacks; or lands a single solid, shot that stops Hazell in her tracks, then bodies up to bludgeon the brunette with a series of hard body shots before bouncing away, leaving Keeley trying to figure out a response as Lindsey wins another round (wide).

R6: Between rounds Hazell's corner emploring her “work the chest” and Keeley comes out to do just that! Right from the bell, Keeley Hazell going 'all in' for Lindsey's juggs; hammering her with a constant barrage of lefts and rights! Not giving the shorter Yank a chance to set her feet to punch, Keeley keeps Pelas reeling back in disarray as she pounds her puppies with a blind vengeance!
Time and again Pelas attempts to fight back short-circuited by one of Keeley's ìpancake punchesî and after nearly two minutes of non-stop abuse, Pelas can barely see thru the tears streaming from her blue eyes. The few times Lindsey is able to clinch, Hazell quickly wraps her up and buries the little blondes face in her cleavage, cutting off her oxygen and weakening her even further. Referee lets it go too often - and too long and after two minues, Pelas is reeling and ready to go!
Keeley Hazell, knowing she has the fight win, can't resist playing to the crowd, slapping at Pelas' puppies and mugging as the huge flesh bags bounce crazily and jiggle. Keeley doing the “Hazell Shuffle” winding up for a bolo punch and shuffling her feet as Pelas sways nearly defenseless in front of her. DOWN SHE GOES!
Pelas, stumbling forward, tilts to her right at the last second as Keeley's right hand sails past her right ear, then leans into a right hand low (LOW!) into the front of Hazell's bikini bottom. Keeley's eyes open wide, her mouth gaping as her mouthpiece is blown out by the force of the gale of wind driven from her by the punch. Keeley doubles forward, hands fluttering to her tummy, her face crashing down on the top of Pelas' head. The head-knock buckles Hazell's knees and she's only dimly aware of what happens next.
A short left uppercut on the chin puts an end to Keeley Hazell's evening as she crashes onto her back, arms spread-eagled, right leg folded under her left knee, her left foot spasming in its attempt to comply with the garbled signals being sent to it by Hazell's already shutting down brain!
Lindsey Pelas stumbles over Hazell's prostrate body, falls to her knees and crawls on all fours to the ropes where she struggles to get to her feet as the referee picks up the timekeepers count at ìFOUR!î
Pelas' knees come off the canvas at “EIGHT!” while Hazell hasn't moved since she hit the canvas. When the count reaches “TEN!” the referee raises Pelas' hand - and again she almost collapses, grabbing the referee to hold herself up.
* * *
After (1): Pandemonium in the ring! Hazell's seconds screaming FOUL while Pelas' people are dancing and waving towels in celebration of their girls' shocking comeback victory. At ringside, officials huddle and, after a long conference with the commissioner, a final ruling is issued eight minutes after the bell. Lindsey Pelas is the winner by a KO in minute 3 of Round Six!

Neither fighter is in any condition to meet the media, whose questions about the fight would more properly directed to the FCBA officials anyway. The commissioner issues a statement reiterating the announced result and leaves it at that. The scorecards, when revealed, show Pelas ahead on points at the start of round six... which was never officially scored due to it ending before time expired.

After (2): Video of Pela's controversial punch to Hazell's belly “was inconclusive due to the camera angle”
while several reporters ringside disagreed on whether it was “low”, “very low” or “only marginally low.” Everything after that punch was clear, however. The impact of Hazell's face/chin on the top of Pelas' head was directly due to Hazell folding forward, making it “accidental contact” and not a “head butt” as Hazell's handlers (hopefully) tried to claim. The knockout left hook by Pelas was clearly a legal, clean, punch and therefore, the announced result of a Pelas KO victory was allowed to stand.

After (3): What, no, JMD? In the days following the fight, Pelas was asked why she didn't ìJMDî Hazell afterward. “To be perfectly honest,” Lindsey said. “I was in no condition to do anything to Keeley. It was all I could do to stand up when the referee raised my hand.”

She added, “Hazell's a much bigger girl than me; a bona fide bantam while I'm a mid-size flyweight. In the future, I'll pay more attention to my opponents size than just her bra or cup size. A girl might get killed if she's not really careful about who she's being matched up against!”

 

 

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