(Words: O & E / Results: Lookout!)
Before: “Just saying our names in the same sentence is exhilarating. It’s been a dream of mine ever since we both tried to take the Ice Hotel that first time. After this fight, I truly believe that I will finally claim my spot at the top of the foodchain. Everything I've fought for comes down to beating Jessica Biel in the boxing ring, so that's just what I'm going to do!" "No combination fighter in the world can beat me," Jess happily proclaims in prefight. "I lost to Laetitia when we had REAL Queens. Adriana's little lashings aren't going to cut it: I won't be there for them. Plus, she's going to be too hurt to think about getting off herself...when I start having my way, all she's gonna be thinking about is keeping her arms in tight, and how best to get out of the fight without looking like a punk. Good luck with that, honey!" Jessica emerging first in black “backflip” bikini, shoulder-length hair loose. Champ Adriana comes out in leopard-print bikini, hair in wild cascades, black gloves all around.
R1: Jessica easing inside, right under her chin; left across waist; left shoulder pointed at Adriana. Lima showing earmuff when weight's on front foot; mirroring Biel's hand-position when weight's on right (back) foot. Adriana may be spooked by HOFer’s reputation, uncharacteristically cautious, waiting on Jessica, answering when it's her turn. Biel initiating - rotating clockwise - lifting pesky up-jabs into Lima's guard, feeling her out. Jessica mounting sudden, slashing attacks from well outside - jumping in lead right hands, or leading with hooks-off-the-hip. Adriana well covered up, defends nicely, but doesn't offer much in the way of receipts.
R2: Jessica jabbing cute while pivoting clockwise - touching Adriana's body and raised guard. Right hands twitch off Biel's shoulder, pounding against Lima's defences: biting left hooks swipe at Champ's waist, taking her in the tummy. Adriana sturdy as advertised, touched up and potshotted, but always inching forward: she's dropping the jab onto Jessica late, spoiling blonde rhythm to avoid the shutout.
R3: Adriana locating Jessica with a jab, then jolting her chin with the right cross, sending her onto the ropes. Biel electing to stand-fast in the pocket, dipping and rolling as Lima works, then coming up underneath to bounce heavy hands off sturdy Brazilian ribcage. Battle drifts inside, two of the brawniest infighters in the division rubbing and bumping as girls swap it up. Adriana leans in close, taking blows on her arms, then looking to dig back short, pumping right/lefts to Jessica's breadbasket. Biel cuter in the pocket - edging in the left shoulder, keeping right at her cheek while leaning weight onto right leg, swatting & cuffing little hooks inside, worrying Lima's ribs; nudging with the extended chicken-wing left elbow; fitting in opportunistic right uppercuts with little chip-shot deliver. Toe-to-toe, Adriana more supple, a little more emphatic inside with her lashing blows and slick shoulder-rolls. Kaley Cuoco in the front row standing, shouting "COME ON, ADDY!" blatantly disregarding stable-solidarity.
R4: Adriana pre-empting Jessica, spoiling her pounce. Lima digging hooks to Biel's waist: brunette in there close, punching blonde off her stance. Jess tries to shake pursuit by hopping side to side: Adriana chests up, staying in touch, driving her blonde before her. Fight drifts to ropes, Biel crouching in the pocket, rolling her torso. Good thumping work down the stretch, Lima on Jessica: Champ able to deploy both hands in bouncing salvoes against blonde's brawny flanks, beating Biel cranky at bell. Bright smile, flirted bum, Adriana Lima, Jessica blushing as she drops a second round to hard working brunette.
R5: Jessica cagey, pawing the jab, retreating in front of Adriana, drawing her forward, looking to duck under Lima's work, come up with the left shoulder in her tits and engage her at close quarters. Adriana’s more than willing to trade with her...leads to bruising bump-n'-slug as girls hook each other's breadbaskets. Jess just a little niftier - cuffing that hook across Lima's breasts to startle the Champ; swatting hooks to jaw; wedging hooks in behind right elbow. Biel doing a good job shoulder-rolling with Adriana’s incoming, meanwhile, Champ's taking stiff right uppercuts to her body or chin as opportunistic Challenger finds the openings.
R6: Adriana getting her shoulder into Jesscia's chest, dipping in close, Champ trying to bash her girl down, but can't quite get the leverage she needs. Lima timing her bursts, short right hands on the chin, lashing hooks on the chin, shoulder bump in the chest and that vicious full-body hook to the body. Biel’s eyes growing distant, punches becoming slaps, Adriana keeps on her, dipping, rolling, then banging away. Another right hand - a little wide - takes Jess on the ear, staggers her to the left. Another right hand, straight up the middle, splits Biel's gloves, pounds back her face and DOWN SHE GOES! Jessica drooping sideways, then sprawling to the matt AND IT'S OVER! Biel in tatters, tears welling up as she can't get off her knees – KO6 for the winner and STILL lightweight champ – Adriana Lima!
After: Swan. Strahovski. Now Biel. Adriana Lima has battered her way through the best of the Tiffany division! Jessica spared the humiliation dealt out to Yvonne, spirited out of the ring just in case. But Adriana is too busy absorbing the adulation of the crowd. Undefeated for a YEAR! and the pundits have called it wrong since February! This champion has given every late-bloomer and no-hoper a new lease on life, and they’re on their feet showing their devotion!
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