O'Dell: "You are looking LIVE at the sold out Asylum Arena in Philadelphia! I'm Jennifer O'Dell, and I'm here along with Tess Valmore, The Bad Girl Of Bazz, Cassie Scerbo, and The Loose Cannon Of The FCBA, The Straw That Stirs The Drink, Jenny McCarthy, and ladies, we have quite the card this evening, one with a musical theme theme..."



Cassie: "That's right, Jenny, and we'll be starting the card at bantamweight, where Charli XCX will make her return to the Asylum against Front Street rookie Hunter King!"



Tess: "We'll have more bantamweight action next, as Rachel Platten will make her Asylum debut against Front Street's Kat Dennings!"



McCarthy: "And, if that's not bad enough, we're going to have to suffer through a welterweight bout between Jessie J and one of Weirdo's newer Dancing Hookers, Antje Utgaard..."



Tess: "And, here I thought you were going to talk about the bantamweight bout between Gwen Stefani and your good buddy Allison 'Mack The Knife' Mack!"



McCarthy: "That FRAUD is no friend of mine and DON'T YOU CALL HER 'MACK THE KNIFE!"



O'Dell: "We've got a lightweight bout on the card, too, matching two of the biggest stars of music, Beyonce Knowles and Katy Perry!



Cassie: "And, let's not forget that the most-exciting division in the FCBA, flyweight, will be represented as well with my compadre, Brenda Song returning to the Asylum for a bout against Jane Levy!"



O'Dell: "Six fights in four weight classes. So, get those shot glasses and bingo cards ready, sit back, relax, and enjoy 'Singers and Song at the Asylum!"