BEFORE:



"Well, I'm definitely happy to be getting another shot in the FCBA," says Rachel with a smile. "And, I know that, if I don't take advantage of this one, it might be a long time before I get another, so..."



"I like this girl," says Kat with a nod. "So, it's all been good before the fight, and, after it's over, it'll be good again. In between, though, I've got to take care of business, you know?"



ROUND ONE:



O'Dell: "We're back at ringside and that's 'Fight Song' you hear, and down the aisle comes the singer of that hit tune, the lovely Rachel Platten..."



McCarthy: "Who is...wait for it...a typical Dancing Hooker opponent with NO FCBA WINS!"



Cassie: "In Rachel's defense, she only has ONE FCBA fight, and it was against a lightweight, Taylor Swift..."



McCarthy: "What's that in her 'win' column? Big goose egg!"



O'Dell: "Platten into the ring and helped off with the robe. She's wearing a black bikini tonight, and, if history is any guide, she won't be the only one in the ring doing so. And, that's 'I Don't Feel Like Dancing' by Scissor Sisters pounding through the arena, and here comes Kat 'The Rack' Dennings!"



McCarthy: "Maybe the most overrated of all the Dancing Hookers in Weirdo's overrated stable of, yes, Dancing Hookers!"



Tess: "You mean, now that Decker's gone?"



McCarthy: "Decker was the most inSUFFERABLE, most EgoTISTICAL...I mean...that entrance...she's just...she...I HATE HER..."



O'Dell: "Really, Tess? She doesn't even WORK here anymore. ANYway, Dennings into the ring and helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve..."



Cassie: "And, 'Neve' would be HALL OF FAMER Neve Campbell..."



McCarthy: "Who shouldn't be anywhere NEAR the hollowed halls of the Hall of Fame!"



Tess: "The HOLLOWED..."



McCarthy: "While I, the GREATEST FIGHTING PLAYMATE OF ALL TIME am unfairly BESMIRCHED by my ABSENCE from those hollowed halls! It's a TRAGEDY of JUSTICE! I'll SUE! I'll SUE!"



Tess: "Here's your ten dollars, BFF..."



Cassie: "Thank you."



O'Dell(sighing): "Dennings wearing that curve-hugging black number we've seen before, and the ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess favors Kat. Mac?"



McCarthy: "ANYone but Dennings and her mentor, that PHONY Campbell! Platten!"



O'Dell: "Cassie?"



Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"



O'Dell: "Here we go. Dennings immediately looking to pressure. Platten wants some distance, making with the jab, using those legs, not in the jab and circle, but to stay off true and force the brunette to work to both close and square. NICE right hand from the blonde and THERE'S ANOTHER AND SHE MAY HAVE HURT DENNINGS!"



McCarthy: "She DID! And Campbell's little pet is going to get taken out of here in the first round and I LOVE it!"



O'Dell: "Kat covering up as the blonde goes all in looking to pull off a big upset! Rachel letting the hands go, backing up Kat, pinning her to the ropes. Dennings keeping the guard high, rolling with, jabbing back in spots, but it's Platten who's doing the damage here. Referee keeping a close eye on things..."



Tess: "He should be, because Dennings is DEFINITELY wobbly right now..."



O'Dell: "Platten trying to find the finisher. Kat in a tight earmuff. Rachel digs some body, then goes right back upstairs. Blonde plenty sturdy with those legs of hers and she's getting some serious power on those punches. Brunette running clock, and, with just seconds to go, she'll survive the first. There's the bell. Rachel wide to start it."



Cassie: "Wow! Did not expect to see THAT."



ROUND TWO:



O'Dell: "Second round underway and Platten on the attack. Kat giving some ground, playing defense at the moment. Blonde staying sound. She wants to press her advantage, but not get sloppy in the process. Dennings counter-punching now, stopping the blonde in the middle of the ring."



Cassie: "Kat seems to have shaken most of the damage from last round. And, boy did Rachel pile it up."



O'Dell: "Platten still the aggressor, though. She's fighting lead right now and Kat, again, working the counter punch. Not what we're used to seeing from Dennings, who's always looking to pressure, but, we're seeing it now. Blonde really showing some chops in there, ladies..."



Tess: "She certainly is, especially for a girl in her second FCBA fight."



O'Dell: "Final thirty seconds of the second. Platten and Dennings exchanging in the middle of the ring and BOTH land some heavy shot in there. Kat digging some body and Rachel responding in kind. Ladies fall into a clinch, punch their way out of it. Kat a SOLID right hand, and there's the bell. Close. Platten again."



McCarthy: "And Campbell's mini-me-with-actual-boobs is now down 20-18."



ROUND THREE:



O'Dell: "Third begins with pressure from Dennings. Brunette coming forward aggressively, working past Platten's jab, getting in close, and working some body. Rachel, as we said, plenty sturdy herself, and she's banging back in kind and we are in the phone booth, ladies..."



Tess: "And, not many fighters like being in there more than Dennings."



O'Dell: "True, but the blonde's giving as good as she gets against the brunette at the moment. Rachel digging body, then going back upstairs. Dennings answering back with the same tactics. Ribs getting punished. Mid-sections taking lots of leather as the ladies do more and more body work as the round goes on."



McCarthy: "And, Dennings getting low with some of those punches. No surprise from a girl who learns from that dirty cheat Campbell!"



O'Dell: "I have not seen a single low blow, but I've seen plenty of hard ones from both fighters. Kat a good right hook to the head there, and that backed Rachel up a step. Dennings following with a hard flurry, forces the blonde to cover up, and there's the bell. Close again. Dennings."



Cassie: "And it's now a one-point lead for Platten, 29-28."



ROUND FOUR:



O'Dell: "Dennings wants to close and bang again, and she's enforcing terms on Platten, crowding her, getting her into the phone booth once again. Rachel may not want to fight this way, but, again, she's doing pretty well in close quarters, working body right along with Kat, who ROCKS RACHEL WITH A RIGHT UPPIE!"



Cassie: "Caught her dropping the head and landed that one pretty cleanly!"



O'Dell: "That she did and Platten's in trouble! Legs almost went on her and Kat's now sighting the big guns and letting the shell fly. Rachel quickly backed to the ropes and Dennings absolutely abusing her there. Platten clinching, trying to slow the brunette down, but Kat shoves off, gets back to work..."



McCarthy: "Just LIKE a Campbell clone! She's working too much body when she should be going for the finisher."



O'Dell: "Kat doing plenty of work downstairs, but she's coming up fairly often, too, looking for the 'off' switch. Platten hanging on, keeping the guard up despite the abuse she's taking to the chassis. Ten seconds to go in the fourth. Blonde's going to survive it. There's the bell. Kat. Wide."



Tess: "And, we're even at 38."



ROUND FIVE:



O'Dell: "Dennings upping the pressure now. She's got Platten in retreat and she aims to keep her there. Rachel giving ground both because she's being forced to and because she wants some space. Brunette, though, not going to give her any. Kat right in the blonde's grill..."



Cassie: "Right where she wants to be. Going to work body, go upstairs with hooks and uppercuts."



O'Dell: "And, that's exactly what she's doing, swarming Platten, forcing her to the defensive. Rachel basically reduced to the counter-punch now, can't get her own offense off under all the fire she's getting from the brunette. Kat hooking ribs with a vengeance in there now, trying to bunch Platten up..."



Tess: "Give Rachel credit, she's shipping a lot of punishment here and staying afloat."



O'Dell: "No question about it, but Dennings piling up the points and piling up the hurt as we go down the stretch. Platten tying up, trying to shove off for space. Dennings punching free, working more body. Kat just DIGGING with those hooks right now and the blonde unable to slow this down. Looks like only the bell will do that and there it is. Dennings and wide."



McCarthy: "Platten's still only down a point, 48-47."



ROUND SIX:



O'Dell: "Second half of the fight begins the way the first half ended. Kat forward, crowding, making this a phone booth fight. Platten trying to slow the brunette down, trying to find a way to get some space, but she can't get it done. She can't shove Kat off and she can't find a way to keep her off."



McCarthy: "And, Dennings keep digging low blows at this bought-and-paid-for ref won't DO anything!"



Cassie: "That's because none of the punches are low."



McCarthy: "You're not just DUMB, Scabbo, you're BLIND, too!"



Cassie: "I'm not the one who needs bifocals."



McCarthy: "BIfoc...who told you...I mean, I DO NOT need BIFOCALS!"



O'Dell: "Dennings hooking body, trying to bunch up Platten, but, while Rachel's pinking up plenty, she's taking the punishment and managing to keep firing back in the counter. Dennings just keeps digging away, thumping the flanks and midsection with hooks and DROPPING PLATTEN WITH A RIGHT UPPERCUT!"



Tess: "WOW! Cassie, you might want to start singing..."



O'Dell: "Dennings again catching Platten bending the head and she blows Rachel right to her back with that uppie! Kat to a neutral corner. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. Rachel's head lolling back and forth, eyes closed. Seven. Eight. Nine. TEN! It's OVER! And your winner by KO6 is Kat 'The Rack' Dennings!"



AFTER:



O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"



Tess: "I have our winner, Kat Dennings, and Kat, were you surprised by how strong she is?"



Kat (nodding): "She's very, very sturdy. She hits hard and she can take a punch. If she'd have started her career five years ago, I think she'd be a threat in this weight with enough work."



O'Dell: "People have been talking a lot about the new Front Street bantamweight division and where everybody fits, so, where do you fit right now?"



Kat: "I don't worry about that. I get in the ring and do my job and let management figure out the rest."