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1 August 2017 Amy Acker vs Milla Jovovich

Page history last edited by Vassago 4 years, 9 months ago

 

CELEBRITY BOXING AFTER DARK

 

Posted by Punchaholics Anonymous on August 1, 2017, 6:55 am

 

 

As is tradition, Jovovich made an appearance in the ring to promote the latest Resident Evil sequel. Unfortunately, the match was postponed for months during a scare where the Punchaholics Anonymous legal team erroneously believed that they had lost the ability to display anything related to the concept of punching for copyright reasons. Acker and Jovovich insisted that the match take place, rather than taking the easy way out. "Look, when I say I'm going to punch Amy Acker's lights out, I don't let her incompetent management stop me," explained Jovovich. Amy Acker partially disagreed. "It's been a bit of a mess. But I've been patient and now I get to have my fun with her!"

Jovovich made her entrance in dark blue athletic wear, greeting the crowd with a wave and a big smile before getting down to business and performing her last minute warmups. Acker walked down the ramp when it was her turn, with Zooey Deschanel clinging to her arm; in their previous boxing match, Deschanel earned herself an internship at Punchaholics Anonymous, supervised by Acker, who had apparently trained the new girl well. Acker wore red athletic wear, while Deschanel stood at ringside in a black one piece swimsuit.

Round 1:
Acker aimed for an uneventful start to the fight, but her opponent wasn't having it. As the smaller actress made a steady, careful approach, Jovovich surprised her with a ferocious charge. Acker, standing her ground and attempting to counter, took a right hand to the jaw despite her solid effort. Jovovich continued to apply the pressure, but Acker was able to stand up to her, solidly hitting back to Jovovich's ribs and avoiding the worst of her offense. In the final seconds, Jovovich increased her efforts, trying to swing the round back, only to be matched by Acker. Despite the intensity, the women parted voluntarily at the bell.

Round 2:
Seemingly encouraged by seeing her opponent struggling, Jovovich charged in for a second try at the bell. Acker, options limited, quickly pivots from playing defense to slugging it out with her opponent. Neither woman emerged unscathed, but Acker blinks first, backing off and cutting her losses as Jovovich pursued her before the bell.

Round 3:
Jovovich got off to a strong start in the third round, beating Acker to the punch and landing a solid right cross to the shorter brunette's nose. Acker's attempts at recovery faltered as the round progressed as Jovovich remained one step ahead, keeping control with her reach advantage and landing a body shaking right hand to the jaw midway through the round. With time running out, Acker made a final push, only to be driven back again by Jovovich's one two combo.

Round 4:
Acker showed enough aggression early in the round to keep Jovovich guessing, slowing the taller woman's own offense down. However, the round was hardly painless for Acker; though she managed to peck at Jovovich's face at arm's length, Jovivich's counterattacks did strike her face as well, if inconsistently. Jovovich, as the clock ticked away with Acker stalling her advance, seemed to lose her temper, but Acker held up perfectly well against her furious opponent if nothing else.

Round 5:
Jovovich proved that making her mad is not a good plan in the fifth round, charging Acker and initiating a brawl early in the round, and shaking the smaller woman with a solid punch to the ribs after a chaotic start. From there, Jovovich was able to build on her momentum against an off balance Acker, sneaking another solid hit to the body through her guard and striking her on the mouth in the following exchanges. Acker stood her ground, but could not seem to punish her rampaging opponent, and was responding much more weakly at the bell.

Round 6:
Again, Jovovich attempted to finish the job, but in the opening seconds Acker beat her to the punch by a hair, stunning her and putting a stop to her offense for the moment. Jovovich, not discouraged, rallied and pushed Acker hard. The two actresses fought to a standstill, landing indirect blows from up close in an energetic battle. In the end, Jovovich has to back down, but the process was hardly painless for her opponent.

Round 7:
Acker and Jovovich traded jabs in the opening, before Jovovich decided to apply pressure. Acker met her directly, slipping past the taller woman's punch and striking her on the jaw. Stunned, Jovovich blinked and jerked her head to the side, but Acker's follow up was already on the way. Her fist smashed into Jovovich's cheek, driving her back on unsteady legs. Acker struck her with a straight armed punch and she collapsed on her side, groaning. Unable to rise, Jovovich rolled onto her back, catching her breath and grimacing -- KO7 Acker.

Deschanel efficiently took her place at Acker's side in the ring as the victorious actress took a victory lap, strutting around Jovovich with one fist raised. When Acker and her so called intern left the ring, they were quickly surrounded by reporters. "She's much prettier up close!" commented a happy Acker. "I expected her to give me some trouble thanks to her size, but it wasn't anything I hadn't prepared for!" Deschanel, rarely seen in public unsupervised by Acker these days, didn't add her two cents.

 

 

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