BEFORE:
"Look," says Jessica with a nod. "I'm aware of the experience I'm giving away tonight, but, I've been waiting a long time for a chance to show I belong in the FCBA. I've got one. And, I'm about to take advantage of it."
"She's right about one thing," says Allison. "She DOES belong in the FCBA. But. She DOESN'T belong in the ring with me, as she's about to find out."
ROUND ONE:
O'Dell: "Back at ringside, and that's 'My Time' by Sucre..."
McCarthy: "Sucrets? She does music, too? I LOVE his lozenges! Especially the cherry ones. You know, I have to keep this golden throat in great shape, and, if it gets a little scratchy, Sucrets always do the trick!"
Tess: "This shameless product placement brought to you by J-Mac..."
O'Dell (sighing): "Not SucRETS, Sucre, which happens to be a BAND, not a person who invented throat lozenges..."
Cassie: "And, the song happens to be the theme song from 'Recovery Road'..."
O'Dell: "Correct, and the FCBA theme music of the star of that series, the lovely Jessica Sula who's making her way to the ring as we speak."
Tess: "And, as she herself pointed out, Sula's giving away a ton of experience tonight, but, the good news is, she doesn't have much to lose, and she's got plenty to gain if she can turn heads in this bout."
O'Dell: "Sula into the ring and helped off with the robe to reveal a lovely gold bikini..."
Oh, the shark, babe
Has such teeth, dear...
McCarthy: "It's UNBELIEVABLE! I can not believe that this tragedy of justice continues!"
Tess: "For those of you joining us for the first time, Mac remains amazed that, YEARS after the Grand Wizard of Boxing BOUGHT THE RIGHTS to this song, one of his fighters continues to use it..."
McCarthy: "Because it's MY SONG!"
Cassie: "Mac, I'm not sure you understand what the word 'bought' means..."
McCarthy: "I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS!"
Cassie: "Then, I'm not sure why you keep saying that the song is yours..."
McCarthy: "Because it IS and that Weirdo STOLE IT to give it to this no-talent wannabe!"
O'Dell (sighing): "The song in question, of course, is 'Mack The Knife' by Bobby Darin and that can only mean that Allison 'Mack The Knife' Mack is on her way to the ring..."
McCarthy: "And, that's my NICKNAME! She stole that, too. Or he did. Or they both did. SOMEBODY STOLE IT!"
O'Dell: "Mack into the ring, wearing that black robe with the gleaming silver knife on the back, one drop of blood dripping from the blade. She's helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that blood read bikini..."
McCarthy: "And a body that wouldn't get her in 'Hustler', let alone 'Playboy'!"
O'Dell (sighing): "And, we're about ready to go. Time for some picks. Tess favors Allison. Mac?"
McCarthy: "I'm not picking that PHONY! Sula!"
O'Dell: "Cassie?"
Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"
O'Dell: "Here we go. Sula wants some space here, which tells us only that she's scouted Allison Mack, because you do NOT want to get inside and bang with her. Sula moving the feet, jabbing, keeping the range with an accurate left hand. She's dropping in the odd right as well..."
Cassie: "Mack doing some recon right now. Working forward here and there. Looking for openings in Sula's defenses."
O'Dell: "No more than probing, though. Sula's getitng the range she wants and she's actually scoring pretty well with both hands at the moment. Not hurting Mack, but she's getting leather home, and, it occurs to me that this is a pretty good start for a fighter making her FCBA debut against a former bantamweight champion."
McCarthy: "Well, if Mack were any kind of fighter it would be."
O'Dell: "Thirty seconds to go in the first, and Sula can't have planned this to have gone much better. Mack not getting much done, brunette has the terms she wants and she's scoring well, seemingly settling in both well and quickly in her FCBA debut. There's the bell, and the first goes convincingly to Jessica Sula."
Tess: "10-9 for the rookie, but we have a LONG way to go."
ROUND TWO:
O'Dell: "Sula right back at it to start the second. Allison, though, a bit more aggressive now. She's working forward, bobbing the head, slipping the jab, going to work on the body. Sula tying up immediately, pinning Mack's arms, forcing the referee to break the fighters apart..."
McCarthy: "Not bad strategy for Sula. She can take away Mack's inside game this way."
Cassie: "Why didn't YOU ever try that against Mack?"
McCarthy: "Because I didn't NEED to try that against Mack!"
Cassie: "Might have stopped her from babifying you twice..."
McCarthy: "She did NOT...you LITTLE..."
O'Dell: "IF we can concentrate on the fight. Sula again tying up Mack and, I think J-Mac is right, this can be an effective strategy for Jessica to slow down Allison inside. Mack punching free, working some body, but Sula ties up again and forces the break. Mack right back forward..."
Tess: "And Sula scoring with that jab."
O'Dell: "Indeed she is, but Allison gets past it and works a little body before Jessica ties up and the referee breaks the pair apart. Very close round this time, with both fighters getting some leather home. Again, Mack in close to bang body, and again Sula ties her up before she can do much damage and there's the bell. Close. Sula again."
McCarthy: "That FRAUD is down 20-18 and I LOVE it!"
ROUND THREE:
O'Dell: "Pattern set in this one. Sula wants to work outside, Mack inside, and the results of this fight will likely depend on which of the two gets what she wants. Again, Sula's working the jab and, again, Allison is working past it. Mack BANGING some body now. Jessica tying up, and Allison punching free."
McCarthy: "Referee needs to watch her in there. Some of those punches are LOW."
O'Dell: "No, they are not, but some of them are landing with more than a little force. Sula again tying, Mack shoving off and NAILING HER WITH AN UPPERCUT! Sula hurt by that right uppercut! Brunette covering up as the blonde lets the hands go in the middle of the ring. Jessica being buffeted backward..."
Tess: "She is in serious trouble right now."
O'Dell: "Sula keeping the guard high, giving ground, trying to stay off the ropes. Doing a good job of it for a minute, but now being pinned to the cables. Twenty seconds to go in the round. Body on sale and Mack is BUYING IN BULK. Allison HAMMERING away, looking to bring that guard down, but Jessica keeping it high right to the bell. Mack. Wide."
Cassie: "And Sula's lead is one point, 29-28."
ROUND FOUR:
O'Dell: "Mack after Sula aggressively to start this stanza. She's walking forward now, letting the hands go, forcing her opponent back. Jessica backing and covering, trying to counter in spots. Mack crowding, thumping body, lands a good right hook that sent sweat flying. Sula clinches, hangs on, forces a break."
McCarthy: "All this kid needs is time. Get her legs back, weather this storm, and she'll be fine."
O'Dell: "Storm still ranging, though. Mack sitting down on her punches, looking to finish this thing. Sula ties up again and Mack shoves off and goes body. Jessica again tying up, and Allison backs her up with a solid flurry to the head. Brunette may have been shaken a little by that one."
Cassie: "A lot of bantams would have gone DOWN on that one, just like they would have on the uppie last round."
O'Dell: "GOOD combination, Mack! Backs Sula up again. Jessica firing back and lands a solid right but Mack a GOOD right hand that wobbled the brunette's knees! Fifteen seconds to go in the round and Mack letting the hands go again. Sula being banged around, but she'll HANG around to the bell. Mack. Wide again."
Tess: "And, we're even at 38."
ROUND FIVE:
O'Dell: "Mack in seek and destroy mode now. Sula back to that jab, trying to create space, using her legs, which seem to have recovered some now. She's working to stay both at range and off square, but Mack so efficient, working past that jab, closing, squaring up and going to work..."
Cassie: "And, again, not where Jessica wants to be with Allison."
O'Dell: "In that phone booth where Mack excels. Allison going body, then back upstairs. Sula tying up, creating a break here, then back to work with the jab. Mack quickly closes and DROPS SULA WITH A RIGHT HOOK! Mack a BLISTERING right hook and Jessica is blown to her back..."
Tess: "You can start singing any time BFF..."
O'Dell: "Count is at three. Four. Five. And, a song might not be out of place at this point, as Tess points out. Six. Seven. Sula not moving at all and it's no wonder, that one landed on the button. Eight. Nine. TEN! It's OVER!"
Cassie: "Mack, tell us how it feels to get starched with one punch by Allison Mack..."
McCarthy: "YOU LITTLE..."
O'Dell: "And, your winner by KO5 is Allison 'Mack The Knife' Mack!"
AFTER:
O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"
Tess: "I have our winner, Allison Mack, and, Allison, slow start, but after that..."
Allison: "She can box some, Tess. Give her some rounds, and she's going to give people problems around here. I just wanted to take my time and get the lay of the land. Once I did, well."
Tess: "That right hook was just about as perfect as it could be."
Allison (nodding): "I got her clean with it. Needed to. She has a chin, no doubt about that. But, no bantam in the FCBA was getting up from that one."
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