Emma Watson versus Holland Roden
(Words: Caspian / Results: Lookout!)



Emma:
(27, 5’6, 13:19 FCBA, VIXENs)


Holland:
(31, 5’3, 1:0 FCBA, Free Agent)


BEFORE:
Cutie-pies looking to make a mess of each other’s pristine outlooks tonight, but for now, both girls willing to snipe at each other from across the press conference table. 

“Emma’s nothing but a washed-up, entitled Brit who’s gone WAY past her prime in the fame and fighting department. She started this whole ‘#MeToo’ campaign just to stay relevant in the public’s eye,” Holland says, getting personal early as she gestures wildly in the air with both hands, as though Ms Watson were pulling some trick wool over the eyes of all her admirers. “She’s facing a *real* American woman tonight!” Roden proudly declares, standing up abruptly from her seat and showing off that toned bikini figure wrapped in red to complement her equally-fiery head of hair. 

Emma as usual showing restraint as she smirks through most of the useless noise, content with letting her opponent make a fool out of herself.

“My my - guess I might be following in Lily’s footsteps and taking out the American trash one bag at a time…” 

Hearing the roar of protest from the US of A supporters in the audience only emboldens Ms Watson to continue. “While Lily’s busy with Vanessa tonight, I think I’ll settle for you, Holland.”

In typical American fashion, Holland responding to Emma’s words with a SLAP to the face followed by a shrill shriek of “You crazy British b*tch! Who do you think you are?? I’ll f*cking murder you and ship you back to London in a BOX!” when the two girls finally come face to face at the podium later on.

However, rather than retaliate, Emma, in a show of great restraint, doesn't respond in kind, instead rubs her cheek with one hand whilst smiling wickedly at the ring officials, who are trying to pull Holland away from her. She’s truly looking goddess-like in her white bra and panties set, donning black gloves later on when they’re in the ring and prepping to begin this duel. Referee rings the bell and here we go with ten rounds of Flyweight action!

ROUND 1:
Holland impresses the crowds with some early shots at Emma’s face - she doesn’t seem like she’s the type of fighter who’ll hang back and let her opponent dictate terms. No siree. Holland coming out strong and swinging, giving Emma trouble early as she has to deal with newcomer enthusiasm. Watson more of a defensive fighter, we all know that, but even then she’s being tested here with the redhead’s aggression: parrying away rough jabs and hooks thrown at her head then doing her best to block incoming shots to her tummy as Roden just simply refuses to give up her quarry. Watson getting into the rhythm towards the end of the first round, however, predicting her attacks with greater and greater ease and accuracy, pays Roden back with a one-two punch combo straight into the face! OUCH. Roden’s eyes water with mixture of hatred and pain, but before she can rush the Brit again, the bell rings, signaling the end of the round. Close round to Holland though truth be told she was expecting Watson to have wilted a lot more, a little earlier. 

ROUND 2: 
No change in tactics for Holland when she barrels straight ahead at the opening bell of the second. By now, however, Emma fully aware of what to expect, takes the rapid jabs comfortably on her guard whilst scooting backwards and sideways on her light feet, refusing to give Roden the satisfaction of landing a clean punch. Roden thinking to herself that this fight is going just swell, racking up points for herself by pushing Watson backwards constantly. What she doesn’t realise is that it’s all part of Emma’s plan, drawing her into a false sense of security... before BLAM - power right hand lands straight to Holland’s mouth; BAMM - another hook to the side of head RATTLES Roden and sends her reeling from the double whammy! UGH! The redhead like a fly caught in sandpaper, wondering what just happened to her flight plan as she gets pushed back now, with Emma picking her off bit by sorry bit from afar. Textbook Watson as she retakes this round by doing what she always does best: letting her opponent make the mistakes and punishing them for it.

ROUND 3:
Holland suddenly not looking as cocky as before, warily stepping out of corner, unsure of what her fight plan should be any more. What confuses her further is Emma still refusing to come get her still, defying the playbook and forcing the first minute to go slow between the two girls. Holland first to break character yet again, venturing a few tentative jabs at Watson before going chips all in with a double hook to her guard. Emma anticipating at last moment, taking the blows to the forearms as she’s rocked about but not quite hurt. Just as Holland about to return swing for a third time’s the charm manoeuvre, she EATS an uppercut straight to the chin, making her swing go wide! Emma stepping in and cleaning house, steady straight hand into the face, step forward, a cross into the nose, step forward, all the while dodging her opponent’s wild fling of arms. Rosen in danger for certain - back hits the ropes and she stays rooted in place, frozen and panicked - prime chance for Watson to RIPP A RIGHT HOOK STRAIGHT THROUGH THE GUARD - it lands flush on her face, blows her down to the side! She’s down, folks, and she seems like it’s lights out! Referee takes a look and concurrs! It’s over!!

Official Decision: Emma Watson defeats Holland Rosen via KO3!

AFTER:
WOW - ROUND 3 and Emma walks away not just victorious but looking like she’s got something to prove! Wiley Brit takes to the turnbuckle, wide smile on her face, acknowledging the crowds with a raised hand high up in the air. Magic in the air as she’s definitely finding newfound success in this newfound stable of hers. Hopefully she can keep the momentum going here.

“Lots of girls underestimate us defensive fighters - they just wanna rush us headlong in. Then they realise their mistake only when it’s too late,” Emma saying with a smile to reporters ring-side. “Holland found out the hard way. And fortunately for me, I don’t think she’ll be the last to learn this lesson!”

Holland definitely will remember this humiliation for the rest of her career. She certainly expected to do better, has to now get herself home and review her performance if she wishes to get back into the ring in the future. Hard to fault her though - her aggressive tactics certainly have their time and place, just that they had little effect against someone like Watson tonight. Maybe next time will be different!