BEFORE:



"Well, the last time I was here," Minnie says with a shake of the head, "I did not cover myself in glory. But. That was Anna Torv, who's a great boxer. This girl is...um...no Anna Torv."

"I may not be Anna Torv," says Charlotte with a hint of a smile. "But, I AM going to be the next girl to knock Minnie Driver on her a**"



ROUND ONE:



O'Dell: "Back at ringside..."

McCarthy: "AHHHHH! I'd forgotten about that AWFUL SCREECHING..."

Tess: "And, once again, I'll remind you that this was a Top 40 song in the UK..."

McCarthy: "And, apparently they have NO musical taste at ALL over there!"

O'Dell (sighing): "The song is 'Everything I've Got In My Pocket', and the singer of same is bouncing down to ringside right now, the lovely Minnie Driver, star of ABC's 'Speechless'!"

Cassie: "The Beatles. The Rolling Stones. The Who. The Kinks. The Clash. Just a few of the bands that came from the UK, where they don't have any musical taste according to Mac..."

McCarthy: "SHUT UP, SCABBO!"

O'Dell: "Minnie into the ring and helped off with the robe to reveal that sky blue number we've seen before..."



All I want to eat is cherry licorice

I don't care if it sounds ridiculous

Even the birds and the bees

Eat how they damn well please



McCarthy: "And, speaking of stupid songs..."

O'Dell: "That would be 'Cherry Licorice' by the Felice Brothers, and that means that 'Agent 00DDD' herself, Charlotte McKinney is on her way to the ring."

McCarthy: "And, that's a stupid nickname!"

Tess: "McKinney in a suddenly crowded Front Street welterweight division, now that Katy Perry's made another appearance there. Pressure's on her for a result tonight, no question.

O'Dell: "Charlotte into the ring and helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that admiral blue number she prefers, and the crowd pops as usual for that body..."

McCarthy: "Overrated."

O'Dell: "And, the ladies are about ready. Time for some picks. Tess likes McKinney. Mac?"

McCarthy: "I'm going with Driver for the upset!"

O'Dell: "Cassie?"

Cassie: "I agree with Tess!"

O'Dell: "Here we go. Driver wants to use that long left jab of hers, establish some space early, but Charlotte is having none of it. McKinney working right past, getting inside, and banging. Blonde has a LOAD of power, and she plans to bring it to bear early in this one, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Not a surprise, but might be a mistake."

O'Dell: "Driver tying up, McKinney shoves off, lands a nice left hand. Minnie gives some ground, turns, sets up behind the jab again, but, again, blonde just walking through it to get inside and thump some body. Driver tying up again and MCKINNEY WITH A RIGHT HOOK AND DOWN GOES MINNIE!"

Cassie: "Referee's not going to earn his pay for this one, because he's going to work about two minutes.."

O'Dell: "Driver just dropped face first to the canvas. Charlotte quickly to a neutral corner, but, as Cassie indicated, I don't think she needs to hurry. Count at three. Four. Five. Six. No movement at all from the brunette. Seven. Eight. Nine. TEN! And it's OVER. That quickly, it's OVER! And your winner in one-punch fashion is 'Agent 00DDD', Charlotte McKinney..."

Tess: "And, it appears she did NOT make a mistake by going after Driver early..."

McCarthy: "Shut UP, Walmart!"

O'Dell: "And, feel free to drink up, boys!"



AFTER:



O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore."

Tess: "I have our winner, Charlotte McKinney, and, Charlotte, you didn't waste any time in there..."

Charlotte (nodding): "Look, up here, everybody's got power. You don't want to muck around in there. If you have a chance to take a girl out, you DO it."

Tess: "There's been a lot of talk about Front Street reentering the welterweight division in a serious way, and I suspect you're a BIG part of that plan..."

Charlotte (nodding): "And, I have big plans of my own, Tess. BIG plans."