Elsa Hosk versus Cobie Smulders
(Words: Emilia / Results: Lookout!)

Pre-Fight: The crowd is loud and ready for action and so are the fighters. This is Elsa’s third fight of the year with two loses and one win, meanwhile Cobie is returning to the ring after nine months and hasn’t won a fight since her 2013 match again Kaley Cuoco. Nevertheless both girls seem equally confident and ready.

Elsa: Hot pink sports bra and black bikini bottom, pink gloves with her hair in a top knot.

Cobie: Black lace bra and panties, black gloves, hair loose. 

Round 1: Action packed start for both girls as the work fast to hurt each other early. Punches are being thrown at lightning speed from both sides with no signs of slowing down. Elsa is relaxed, picking her punches and precisely choosing where they land, on the other hand Cobie is working at a 110% just to keep up and Elsa knows it but neither girl is still stepping down. The action is only brought to a grinding halt when the bell rings and the round ends in a draw. Cobie is looking overworked and tired already while Elsa takes tips from her corner: “Up the hurt, she’s can’t last much longer.” 

Round 2: Multiple jabs to the face chase Cobie to ropes early, she’s starting to look exhausted and weak while Elsa keeps rocking her hips and plexus with crosses as Cobie fails to defend. She’s moaning and her knees are starting to buckle. Elsa notices that and reaches under Cobie’s gloves and pull her up keeping her stable for a few more hooks to the cheek. Clinching proves to be the only working tactic for Cobie so far as she manages to escape while landing a few hooks to Elsa belly, hooks strong enough to make her feel it but not strong enough to stop her. Being out in the open might not be the best idea for Cobie. Elsa stalker around the ring for a bit and then moves in to swamp body blows chasing her to ropes again with ease. Elsa goes back to hooking for hips and body while Cobie returns to moaning in pain, not taking the beating well. 

Round 3: Elsa stalking her foe, smirking and moving in with a face spanking via jabs; pounding away at cheeks, nose and forehead. Elsa moving downstairs, dropping hooks to hips and ribs as she did in round two. Cobie fighting back but without positive results. She lands one adequate punch for every few Elsa lands only making it easier for Elsa to breach her defences. With Cobie still fighting back Elsa slows down, takes a few hits and waits for the perfect moment. Cobie keeps throwing punches at top speed, then BOOM, she goes down for the count via powerful uppercut by Elsa. 6… 7… 8… She beats the count but as soon as she’s up Elsa is right on top of her with more jabs to the face and hooks to the hips and ribs. She’s taking a merciless beating by Elsa which is only stopped by the bell, walking back to her corner like a wounded animal.

Round 4: More of the same; Cobie hanging by the ropes dimly while Elsa issues another beatdown. Elsa strolling around the ring drawing Cobie in the ropes, baiting her with uppercuts in succession, picking her apart. When Cobie would defend herself or when she would play aggressively Elsa had a solution for both nullifying her tactics and countering. A full minute passes with Elsa circling, stalking Cobie around the ring, jabbing and hooking, slowly breaking the girl down. Cobie’s hands are hanging to low, there’s not much she can do as Elsa throws a few more uppercuts her way and SHE’S DOWN AGAIN. 6… 7... 8... 9… Cobie rises at the last second but for what cause. She’s being beaten round to round. Too old and to slow as Elsa ties up loose ends. She easily drives the beaten girl to ropes and starts firing like a machine gun. She’s fed up already and knows Cobie can’t defend herself. After ten seconds which seemed like ten minutes for poor Cobie the ref steps in and ends the fight declaring Elsa the winner.

Post-Fight: Cobie takes the full treatment. Elsa climbing the ropes, blowing kisses to the fans, casually taking her time as the med team patches Cobie up. “It was never a contest” Elsa boasts to the press “She’s 38 and hasn’t had much fighting experience over the last few years. As a matter of fact I almost feel bad accepting the fight.” Elsa continues…