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16 July 2020 Rashida Jones vs Milana Vayntrub

Page history last edited by caspian2 3 years, 5 months ago

CELEBRITY BOXING AFTER DARK

Posted by The Comediennes on Jul 16, 2020 at 4:04pm

Rashida Jones
(44 / 5’4” / 0:0 FCBA / The Comediennes)

Milana Vayntrub
(33 / 5’3” / 1:4 FCBA / Free Agent)

Results: Lookout! / Story: The Comediennes

Pre-fight:

There isn’t much interest by the media in this fight except for Rashida being the member of a brand new stable. It’s clear they want to ease her into the FCBA with a fight against a low ranking fighter with only 1 win to her name. The only other angle is that The Comediennes were eyeing Milana before they signed their core four. A win for her tonight could have the stable questioning their very early roster choices.

The media consists of a handful of writers for blogs and not much else.

“You know, I’m just grateful for this opportunity,” Rashida says. “I’m trying something new at the age of forty-four! It’s exciting. A little scary. But I know Milana isn’t exactly a world-beater, so hopefully I’ll be able to start off right.”

“I’m here to prove one thing and only one thing,” says Milana. “The Comediennes made a HUGE mistake picking Rashida over me. I mean she’s almost FIFTY! What are they going to do with a fighter like that? She’s pushing retirement age already. When she’s sleeping on the canvas MAYBE I’ll entertain a call from them. Or maybe a better stable will reach out…”

R1: Milana’s best feature is her movement and she tries to show it off in the opening round. Perhaps a little too much. Rashida, being older, can’t quite move as quick as Milana. But as Milana dances around Rashida, peppering her with jabs, it becomes clear that they’re not bothering her much. Plus, Rashida’s southpaw style is giving Milana some fits early.

Rashida on the other hand waits, bides her time… and then PLOW a left hook catching Milana off guard. Milana takes another hard hook from the other side as Rashida is throwing absolute bombs early on. She wants to make the most out of this! Rashida goes for another huge hook, but Milana blocks this time and counters with a jab. Rashida’s head snaps back and she backs up. The first real good shot by Milana in this early fight. Milana follows up, trying to knock Rashida’s head around. She can’t quite sneak through the defenses, though. Rashida holding up tight.

It’s an even round so far. Rashida has drifted close to the ropes, but all of a sudden steps in and sinks a left handed shot to Milana’s ribs. Milana clutches a bit and then eats two quick jabs from the older woman.

The bell rings and Rashida walks away up 10-9 after a close first round.

R2: Milana frustrated by the turn of events at the end of that round. She ignores her trainer’s advice and stands up ready to roll.

Rashida comes in, again lagging in speed. Milana is determined not to make the same mistakes again. Rashida goes for a huge swing. She misses. Rashida throws a right hook. Milana dodges. Rashida comes in, gets off a couple of jabs to a blocking Milana and then is met with a jab back. It snaps Rashida’s head back, but it doesn’t do much else. Milana is getting frustrated with how little her punches seem to be affecting Rashida.

Rashida gets off a nice combo to Milana’s stomach, a jab and a follow up swooping blow to the ribs. The same side she hit before. Milana clutches her side again. Rashida now coming in with a huge left uppercut! But she hits nothing but air as Milana side-steps and fires off a rocket of a right cross to Rashida’s forehead. Now that snaps her head back and then some!

Milana moves in, dodging left, right, left, left again. Then BAM. Another right cross to Rashida. Rashida struggling to maintain the pace. BAM another blow, this time a hook to Rashida’s ribs. The older woman definitely felt that one. A few more jabs by Milana. Rashida lands a couple of light hits back in a flurry. They’re standing in the middle of the ring, trading punches.

Rashida getting marked up. Milana now using her movement and superior footwork to dance around Rashida. Jones looking weary already and it’s only round two. A few more jabs to Rashida’s temple and a follow-up uppercut that rings her bell! But Milana doesn’t have enough power to knock her down.

The bell rings as Milana walks back to the corner fairly confident she’s taken this round and tied it 19-19.

R3: Rashida got absolutely tagged last round and the start of round 3 is more of the same. Milana’s speed wreaks havoc on Rashida. It doesn’t help that Rashida is coming out of her corner hesitant. She doesn’t look nearly as confident as when the fight started. With every jab to the face and shot to the body she takes, the more it looks like Rashida is regretting joining the FCBA.

Milana presses, stepping up as she tries to get Rashida to the ropes. She starts to bully her back. Rashida leans forward and clutches her in a tight clinch. Rashida’s jaw hanging open. Is she worn out already? The ref steps in and they break. Milana continues her strategy. Rashida throwing only a few punches here and there, enough to keep Milana from completely rushing her. But she runs out of space and now Milana starts to hammer her. Two hard uppercuts to the ribs and Rashida goes bug-eyed. She clinches Milana again. It’s a smart move as she’s able to walk them around a bit.

They break and Milana goes in for a huge right hook but Rashida blocks it! Rashida counters with a left cross. And now it’s Milana backing up! What a precise blow by Jones… she’s got Milana on her heels from that one shot. Rashida finding her confidence now. Another cross, a few jabs, and Milana’s defense raises. Rashida begins working the body. Those ribs are taking a pounding. Milana clutches again. Rashida pushes her into the corner. Milana taking some pretty heavy blows now and the bell rings, potentially saving her!

Rashida’s comeback that round was impressive, but Milana’s control of the first two minutes gives her a close win. 29-28.

R4: Milana was stunned at the end of that round. She comes in a little more hesitant, trying to use her speed to keep her distance. Those ribs are aching something fierce and she’s showing it. The question is will an inexperienced fighter like Rashida notice it?

Milana keeps Rashida at bay early in the round. A couple of jabs, using her mobility to stop any heavy stuff from landing. Rashida sure is a swinger.

It’s only a matter of time though before Rashida feigns a right and wallops Milana with a left to the ribs. The younger girl lets out an echoing yelp. If Rashida didn’t know Milana’s side was hurting before, she does now.

Rashida ups the tempo a bit as a now sluggish Milana isn’t doing nearly as much dancing. Rashida with a right jab. Then another. Backing Milana up until Rashida comes in with one more brutal left shot to the ribs. And Milana goes down!

Collapsing onto her knees. She can’t believe it. She’s clutching her side with one hand while keeping herself on the canvas with the other. Milana pants. She winces with every breath she takes. The ref counts all the way to 10 as Rashida stuns Milana with the knockout!

Winner: Rashida Jones KO Round 4

Post-fight:

“I… I just got battered,” Milana says, still in disbelief. “Her southpaw style really threw me and that hook to the ribs. I didn’t have an answer for it. I’m not sure what I’m going to do next… doesn’t get much worse than losing to a 44-year-old rookie from a brand new stable.”

“Listen, Milana talked a lot of trash coming into this,” Rashida says as she flashes her radiant smile. “But now she knows that she doesn’t belong in this stable. I do. And after seeing Elyse pound Jenette McCurdy, I think we’re going to make a real mark on this league. Sure, Milana is nothing special, but any girl in the flyweight division who wants a shot at me feel free to take it. And that’s not a joke!”