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5 August 2020 Adrianne Palicki vs Jennifer Lawrence

Page history last edited by caspian2 3 years, 4 months ago

CELEBRITY BOXING AFTER DARK

Posted by Lookout! Boxing on Aug 5, 2020 at 9:31am

Adrianne Palicki vs Jennifer Lawrence (result:Lookout, writing:simgrrl)

Tale of the Tape
Adrianne Palicki (Sceej): (37yo, 5'11", 139#, 35-33-0; w/30KO) Boxing World #5
Jen Lawrence (Chimera): (29yo, 5'09", 139#, 34-25-1; w/31KO) Boxing World #8

Before: A rematch of their September 2014 lightweight fight that went 10 rounds and ended in a KO by Palicki. This one will be at their natural welter weight, with both just slipping in below the 140 limit. Jen Lawrence has youth, and a slight edge in punching power, on her side; but Palicki's been more active lately. She's fought every month since a two month break for the New Year holidays, hoping to shake off any lingering aftereffects of a 1-5 record in 2019.

Lawrence has gone 11-14 since she got off to a 23-10 hot start from 2012 to 2016, but lately there's been some talk she may have lost the edge she had campaigning at lightweight against smaller women. Opinions vary about that, with theories that include her having gained too much weight that's cost her quickness....or the more likely one that she's facing tougher competition at welter than at the lightweight, where she often outweighed opponents by as much as ten pounds.

Palicki never enjoyed the success predicted for her after she broke into the FCBA in 2008 by going 25-19 in her first 6 years - including winning two lightweight titles (Diaz in 2011 and Biel in 2012). Since her second lightweight title, she's lost both times she challenged for the title - to Biel in 2012 and Strahovski in 2013. After an 18 month "retirement" following 2014, Adrianne returned in June 2016 with a loss to Anna Torv. She struggled below .500 until her stunning upset of Righetti which won her the welterweight crown; a title she lost in her second defense (to Decker). Since dropping the title Adrianne's lost three straight coming into tonight's contest.

Jen's results, like her weight, have been up and down the last four years. She's only 10-14 since her win over Peregrym in May of 2017, but she's won two of three since coming back from a break to shoot a film between Nov 2019 and March when Jen shook off the rust in a hard-fought tilt with Courtney Tailor. Lawrence dropped Tailor in the 5th only to lose in a 7th round KO.

Since that loss, however, J-Law's 2-0 against Barros and Mandy Moore, working her way back into fighting trim and earning this fight against the #5 ranked welter. With a win here tonight, Lawrence looks to move into the top five - positioning her for yet another welter challenge. If she gets it, this would be her fifth try for a belt after two failed attempts at light (Strahovski and Yustman) and two previous ones at welter (Upton and Righetti).

Palicki is flanked by Sceej's trainer Scrubby McGee with his close friend "Jim Beam." Sceej's assistant trainer, G.L.N. Nolin trails along, glancing over her shoulder frequently like she's looking for someone to jump her back. Adrianne's wearing her orange boxing trunks with a shimmering white halter and white gloves. Her long blonde hair is wet and pulled back in a fighting ponytail secured by a white scrunchie. A big fan of nicknames and walk out music - ala boxing and wrestling - Adrianne's nickname (thanks Simguy) is "the Chin Checker" though in the Sceej corner, Scrubby often calls her "Addie." She's chosen for her walk-out music, LL Cool-J's "Mama Said Knock You Out!"

Lawrence fronts Charlize Theron and Christina Hendricks coming out of her locker room. She's in her green Theron-look bikini wearing green gloves with a white striking surface. Jen's bare feet are wrapped Muai Thai style; her honey-blonde hair in a tight French 'battle braid.' Chimera, having extensively scouted Palicki, wanted to make a statement of their own and are playing a walk-out song for the first time in a J-Law fight. "I Fought The Law And The Law Won!" was the consensus choice (the cover version by Green Day, since nobody at Chimera - despite being the FCBA's oldest stable - is old enough to remember the original Bobby Fuller Four version.)

And by all means - Nolin and Theron exchanging shoves during the referees instructions is very in character! It gnaws at GLN that Theron is recognized as the GOAT and she's an afterthought - not in HOF despite qualifying (did somebody say Pete Rose?). Gena Lee will surely be remembered (fairly) as the dirtiest fighter in FCBA history. It KILLED her when Tess interviewed Charlize and inquired about memorable opponents and GLN didn't even get mentioned!

After her loss to Gerber, Nolin is likely to stay retired, but she'll almost certainly remain a presence at ringside for the foreseeable future - at least for as long as she can help 'stir the pot' for Sceej fighters. And if Gena Lee needs any help, Jenny McCarthy is sitting ringside in the Sceej corner, looking dour after her 3rd round dismissal by Kira Kosarin in what may have been 'Mac the Knife's last failed try to win any kind of an FCBA title!
* * *
During Rd 1: Both women cautious from the bell, staying well outside - circling, feinting... both missing combinations. It's a methodical, yet menacing, pace as they duel at long range. Soon, however, they settle down and harder punches are exchanged. There's less movement and more punching as the round goes on. Palicki steps in with a right hand to J-Law's belly, but eats a chopping right to chin in return.
They trade combos; Ad's a clubbing left hook and Jen's a straight right; both blows land flush and do damage. Spirited exchanges continue as Lawrence presses action with Adrianne stubbornly holding her ground, slugging back.
Down the stretch, J-Law hurt to the body, pushed into the ropes hunched over. Palicki straightens her up with a short left, then turns her hips into a brutal overhand right - driving her fist to a CRASH LANDING on Jen's jutting chin. J-Law hurt; staggered; her gloves up to protect her head as Adrianne squares away, HEAVING in right/left/right/left/right/left to the breadbasket via pumping arm action - her left cheek nuzzling against J-Law's neck throughout the pounding. Adrianne bracing J-Law upright with left forearm in tits, feeding Lawrence the right hand to belly thump-thump-thump: AP shifting weight to brace a sagging Lawrence upright with both hands, then getting back downstairs left/right/left/right. J-Law ashen faced - eyes closed in cranky little frown, lips curling off teeth...bell sounds - Adrianne practically frothing at the mouth to bury extra insurance to paunch...ref pulls her off from behind as Lawrence hugs herself, sags in ropes gutshot! Adrianne's huge opening round battering Lawrence easily garners the points by a wide margin, leaving Jen in a big hole after just one round.
**
Rd 2: J-Law still a little green around the gills rising from the stool; out pawing her left in Adrianne's face as she retreats to her right. Palicki walking her down - stabbing open-handed palms into Jen's chest, then jabbing her breasts when she manages to close the distance. RIGHT HAND, LAWRENCE! Shattering blast to chin sends Adrianne reeling back against the ropes - her head bobbing groggily. Her elbows in, gloves at her cheeks as Jen wades in behind flashing leather. BIFF! BANG! POW! Adrianne reeling back under a barrage of blows! J-Law squaring up; taking advantage of Palicki's exposed belly with piston-punching arm-action. Jen levering Adrianne erect, then slamming her left forearm across her bosom in payback for the earlier abuse of her 'puppies'. Lawrence gets in several devastating rights to Palicki's paunch....one, two, three... backs off, then steps back in for one more...four!
Like a blacksmith hammering an anvil, Lawrence jacks Adrianne up to pound her body. Jen forcing her way inside, prying apart Adrianne's defenses, drives three more body busting blows to her belly!
Palicki rag-dolled, her cheek on J-Law's shoulder; mouth gaping as she gulps air while J-Law's fists dig deep into the softness of Adrianne's abused abs. Palicki, mouth open, body limp has her butt stuffed in the ropes as her arms slip-slide down off Jen's sweaty shoulders. A final overhand is too much for Palicki as J-Law finally beats the older veteran to knees. As the referee jumps in, Adrianne slumps forward on her elbows and forearms, her forehead on the canvas; her body shuddering in pain. As the count reaches seven, Palicki looks up at the referee...just as the bell rings ending the second round! Adrianne drags herself up ropes, pulling herself together as she stumbles to her corner...a ragged beauty who's been 'saved by the bell'...or has she only delayed the inevitable? Lawrence overcomes a slow start to win the second on points wide!
**
Rd 3: Adrianne rallys! Doubling up her jabs, Ad begins to target Jennifer's breasts, hoping to distract her with J-Law swinging for the fences hoping to end it right here and right now! But Jen's wild offensive plays right into Adrianne's hands, giving the battered beauty the time she needed to recover and clear her head... right up until Lawrence lands another right hand. Again forced to clinch Adrianne, hangs on grimly; their sweaty bodies grinding and rubbing against each other. The ref has his hands full as he struggles to pry their slippery torso's apart. Once that's done, Lawrence gliding smoothly away, hands jangling loose at her waist, then snapping the jab up off her left hip as she circles.
Palicki, forced to try bulldozing her way thru J-Law's steady drumbeat of jabs, exposes her left flank to Lawrence's right cross as she determinedly walks her down, being pot-shotted at every step of the way.
Once more at close quarters, they clinch with Lawrence digging hooks beneath Addie's right elbow or chopping down wide sweeping rights over the chin checker's left shoulder. Palicki finally ties Jen up; the wily veteran putting her weight on Lawrence, taking a break to get her legs back under her; but giving up her body and J-Law takes advantage, thumping the older woman's body to the end Bell, the the round to Lawrence wide...a heavy price as Palicki's fighting to survive.
**
Rd 4: Palicki off her stool before the bell, her ears burning from Scrubby's between bells scolding. Adrianne getting right back into J-Law's jugs, where she thought she'd had some success before - until things went South on her late. Lawrence turning into a crisp right that Adrianne was ready for; she slipped it and shot a left hook of her own to Jen's paunch. Lawrence grunting on impact, grabs Palicki up high and whirls her around riding her back into the ropes.
J-Law with a two-fisted body attack; Adrianne ear-muffing her gloves as she shields her midsection with her elbows, letting Jennifer spend her energy. Adrianne coming up off the ropes with a sweeping left that catches Lawrence high on the head, stunning her momentarily before answering with a left hook of her own to Adrianne's body and a right to the chin. Palicki not backing down, trades a left-right combo for a J-Law right, coming off with the better of the trade as Lawrence's thighs jiggle from the impact of Adrianne's right to her belly!
Jen bending forward, manages to lift a quick right inside Palicki's guard to snap her head back, but Adrianne's got her back up and immediately answers with a straight right/left hook combo of her own. Jen replies with her own combination, then both women fall together, battering hammer and tong to the others body!
Adrianne snaps a right to J-Law's chin and Lawrence answers with one of her own! The fight turns into a pier six brawl as both women forget defense to try to hurt the other as much as possible in the little time remaining in the round. This affair's got the crowd on their feet as the two women go toe-to-toe, bodies arched over, head-to-head trading right hands to the body for left hooks to the head, and vice-versa...just pounding each other, taking turns; one with a left, the other with a right, then they change and repeat. It's a barn-burner to the bell with both throwing with both hands has to push in between them and push them back. At the bell they're still trying to reach over the ref to get at the other.
Score goes Palicki's way wide, thanks to her pressuring Lawrence relentlessly from the opening bell despite being stymied several times by Lawrence's counter-punching.
**
Rd 5: Palicki opens the fifth right where she left off in the fourth...on the attack...tall and limber... on her toes...eyes flashing with indignation! Taking advantage of her length, Addie leans in, flashes some leather then leans back to make Lawrence miss the counter. Frustrated Jen, loading up and heaving bombs that will stop Palicki in her tracks...if they connect...but Jen's right misses the mark and Adrianne's counter right cross explodes flush on J-Law's chin as she's leaning in and LAWRENCE HITS THE DECK!
Jen stumbles, staggers, then crumples to all fours as Palicki's 'go home' left hook sails harmlessly over her head. Jen shakes her head and, blinking, looks around as the referee picks up the count at three. Jen sits back on her haunches, then slowly climbs back to her feet; her eyes blinking as the referee asks if she's OK. Nodding, she holds up her gloves and he motions for them to continue.
Adrianne limber on her toes, glides forward, leaning in and out as she jabs Lawrence's plump lips with her left; keeping her right locked and loaded at her shoulder. Lawrence allowing Palicki to pitty-pat her back across the ring, using the time gained to try to clear her head. Backed to the ropes, however, Lawrence is out of room and has no choice but to stand her ground and fight.
Adrianne helps herself to Jen's lush body as Jen leans back trapped on the strands. Palicki rocking Jen time and again with heavy rights to the head and drilling into her body with laser-like lefts. Jan resorts to clinching to save herself, but at the cost of giving Adrianne free shots at her body. Palicki loading up, putting her left cheek on Jen's right cheek; her left shoulder in Lawrence's chest, then drilling her body with rights until the referee backs her off.
Jen winded, wobbly, turtles with her butt in the ropes; gloves at her temples; ducking, bobbing and rolling her shoulders; not giving Adrianne an easy target. Palicki happy to take what she can, bangs away at Lawrence's once-suspect abs. But Jen's gym time pays off and Adrianne can't make any headway there. At the bell, Palicki's bouncing up and down on her toes, whistling punches with both hands as Jen stands motionless and takes it. Adrianne's knockdown in minute one, and her subsequent domination, earn her the round wide!
**
Rd 6: OH MY! Lawrence lights Adrianne up with another overhand right in the first minute, her glove flattening itself upside Palicki's jaw...the impact left the veteran on silly street, swerving blindly back and forth across the double center line. Adrianne - somehow - doesn't go down but only because she grimly wraps Jen in a bearhug, both arms clamped on Lawrence's chest, her head on Jen's chest with her nose in the young blonde's sweaty cleavage.
J-Law hooking Palicki's flanks with both fists, her bare feet digging into the canvas as she slowly backs Adrianne into the ropes where the referee is forced to break them apart. Jen takes a step back as the referee studies Adrianne's eyes, but the moment he steps away and turns to gesture for them to resume, Jen's right back on Adrianne with a short right that almost smacks the mouthpiece outta Ad's mouth. Palicki bites down on it, with the mouth guard half out between her teeth... Lawrence leaning into Addie who, hands up at her face, her mouth working the rubber guard, is being rag-dolled by Jen who pumps lefts and rights in downstairs.
Jen shoving Adrianne's shoulders back, propping her upright as the referee steps in to stop things while he replaces Palicki's askew mouthpiece. Then Jen's back on the attack - fists pounding dimples into Palicki's smooth, round, paunch! Palicki, her eyes dimming, her lips parted in a snarling grimace, has no answer except to hang on as Lawrence keeps pounding until her right cross swivels Adrianne's head around.
Palicki, lashes fluttering groping with her left hand beneath Lawrence's right elbow, can't finish the clinch as Jen shakes her off, steps back and piston-pounds her fists right/left, right/left into Palicki's belly, softening up her abs. Palicki, doubled over, stumbling as she's taking heavy body blows but refusing - or unable - to take a backward step! DOWN GOES PALICKI! Palicki drops to her knees, her hands clasped to her stomach, then slumps forward on her elbows and knees, shaking her head as her mouthpiece slips from her trembling lips as the referee hurriedly backs Lawrence away. Jen's mouth breathing as the referee starts to count.
Palicki struggles to her feet, ruined, staggers back to sit with her butt on the middle rope as the referee picks up her mouth guard As he turns, Theron tosses him a water bottle from the Chimera corner that he uses to rinse Palicki's mouthpiece with a quick squirt. Theron's attempt to hurry things along pays dividends as he pushes Adrianne's mouth guard in and when he asks if she's OK, Adrianne replies with a curt nod and lifts her gloves.
Lawrence lunges back in to finish with another wide, sweeping, overhand right. Palicki recoils to the ropes in disarray as J-Law surges in with a left to Adrianne's right ear and a second right to the jaw - draping Palicki backward over the top rope. As Palicki rebound back upright with her arms at her sides, Lawrence reaches back to throw a massive right...but at that moment the bell rings and although Jen was already letting the punch fly, she managed to pull it short avoiding Adrianne's unprotected face.
Saved by the bell from certain defeat, Adrianne Palicki weaves her way off the ropes, aided to her corner by the referee who's met halfway by McGee and Nolin who support Adrianne back to her stool with J-Law's 'bell-to-bell' beat down easily earns her the points.
**
Rd 7: Desperate times call for desperate measures. It's clear by GLN's reaction to Jenny McCarthy's unexpected visit that the two blondes have come up with some kind of plan to pull Ad's chestnuts out of the fire. Scrubby McGee shaking his head in dismay as he sends her out for the seventh after a final word or two from the two blondes.
Surprisingly, whatever GLN and Jenny Mac had cooked up seems to agree with Addie. Palicki starts like a house afire, winning the opening exchange and LAWRENCE IS HURT! Ad's left hook feint draws Jen's attention, then her straight right buckles the young blondes knees! Adrianne doubling up with the right, rocking J-Law back on her heels! Palicki steams forward but Jen, unsteady, keeps fighting back, stubbornly coming off the ropes with a left/right of her own to stop the veteran brunette's advance in its tracks.
Lawrence, with a right staggers Adrianne, but the wily old vet shakes it off and wallops a big right to Jen's left temple and, again, Lawrence is wonky. Girls lean on each other, both hurting from the heavy blows exchanged; swapping body shots, the grueling action having taken a toll on both fighters. And we're just one minute into the round.
Palicki's face in a determined grimace; her fists sweeping lefts and rights back and forth across Jen's heaving bosom, sloshing her juggs to the delight of the blondes in Palicki's corner. They're jumping up and down clapping excitedly at the sight of Jen's madly juggling jubblies.
Her eyes tearing, Lawrence blinking as she digs down deep to hammers Palicki back with three rights to Adrianne's belly. The bigger fighter falling forward as her right slips harmlessly over J-Law's left shoulder. Adrianne grabs the back of Lawrence's head and pulls her in to clinch, but J-Law shoots a right up between their chests and her uppercut buckles Palicki's knees!
Hanging onto Jen's neck, Adrianne slumps against her, her head rolling groggily on her shoulders. Jen fights to pull away from her as the referee starts to move in just as Lawrence slaps a left jab between Palicki's eyes and Adrianne sits down hard at the referee's feet!
The referee steps and points J-Law to a corner as Adrianne sits up and rolls over, struggling to her knees, then using the ropes, regains her feet.
Over in the Sceej corner, McCarthy grabs GLN's arm and screams, "GET UP! OHH... DO SOMETH... ANY...THING..." Then shakes her head and mutters, "...stupid cow!"
The referee waves them together once more. Palicki swaying, steadies and flicks a left and a hard right hand across J-Law's mouth, swiveling her head. Palicki trying a second right hand that misses as Lawrence leans back just out of reach. J-Law's left hook staggers Adrianne who has to clinch, giving Jen several shots to Palicki''s belly! A left-right clobbers Palicki, then another left hook to the jaw has Palicki stepping in fence post holes! Adrianne, hands at waist, mouth open gulping air, misses a left hook that she pulls short.
Jen leans into a straight right hand to Addie's head hurts her... reloads and throws again! Lawrence's looping right to Addie's ear has Palicki hurt. Sceej's trainer McGee reaches for the towel, but McCarthy grabs it away. J-Law jacks up Adrianne on the ropes. With her left in Addie's face Jen drives a right to the chin and Palicki's hands drop... her sleepy eyes blinking; her body wobbling; ready to go! Lawrence steadies Palicki with her left glove on Adrianne's forehead, looking to the referee whose looking into Sceej's corner where McCarthy and Gena Lee are having a tug-of-war over the towel. Jenny screaming at Palicki in frustration, "FIGHT BACK YOU BUM!" even as the referee steps in to grab a groggy Adrianne Palicki and pulls her away from Lawrence while waving a hand overhead to call off the rest of the fight.
Theron and Hendricks come bounding into the ring to congratulate the winner as Scrubby McGee is busy getting the towel back from McCarthy and Nolin. Palicki, swaying unsteadily, is barely aware of what's going on around her. Not realizing the fight has been stopped, and seeing Jen's smiling face in front her, Adrianne throws a wild punch that smacks J-Law in the head! Jen reels back in shock, then puts up her fists and goes after Palicki again. Charlize grabs Adrianne in a front bearhug as Hendricks steps in front of Lawrence with her hands out. The referee, nearly trampled in the crush of pulchritude, backs off and turns to give the official result to the ringside officials: TKO7 Jennifer Lawrence.
**
After: But as soon as the referees back is turned all hell breaks out in the ring! While Theron is wrestling Palicki into control, her arms clamped tight around her chest, she's screaming at Adrianne, "CALM DOWN... IT'S OVER. HE STOPPED THE FIGHT!"

Palicki shakes her head, unwilling to accept the reality that the referee stopped the fight with her still fighting and wanting to continue. When Adrianne stops struggling Charlize relaxes her bearhug, but just then Gena Lee and Jenny "Mac" arrive on the scene.

Nolin crashes into Theron from behind, grabs a fistful of her hair and pulls her away from Palicki, then swings her around and flings her face first into the ropes. Charlize reaches out to catch herself. but her hands slide over the ropes and her chest slams into the top rope, leaving her draped over it with her arms outside the ring. Gena Lee quickly slips her hands under Charlize's arms and pulls her into a Full Nelson, pulling her backward into the ring and turning her around to face Jenny McCarthy who has been screaming at GLN, telling her, "Get her under control...dammit!"

Jenny leers at Charlize as Gena Lee tightens her Full Nelson, forcing Theron's back to arch, exposing her upper chest as Jenny winds up. SMACK, she drives her right fist into Charlize's belly and Nolin staggers as Charlize is slammed back into her. Gena, however, maintains her grip on the G.O.A.T.

"Hold her still!" Jenny huffs as she winds up again. WHAP! Jenny slams another right into Charlize's chest and then grins as she sees Theron's mouth open in silent protest to the punch. As Jenny's winding up for a third punch, Palicki, Lawrence and Hendricks are standing by the ropes with J-Law between the two bigger woman, her hands on their arms to restrain them as they both want to get into the action and help Charlize.

"Hold up," Jen tells them. "She won't like it if you spoil the party...wait and watch."

Before Mac 'the knife' can throw a third punch, Theron snaps her head backward, smashing her skull into GLN's nose. Gena Lee loses her grip on Charlize, who spins out of her grasp just as Jenny's fist comes flying toward her. THUD! Instead of Theron Jenny's fist hits GLN's chest and she groans as she staggers back, holding her bosom with both hands.

Charlize kicks out her right leg, her foot sweeping up between Jenny's firmly planted legs. The impact lifts Jenny up on her toes, leaving her perfectly set up for a Theron right cross that sends the trouble-maker flying backward to land on her ass. Turning around, Charlize pulls Gena Lee forward with a handful of golden hair, then Hair Mares her halfway across the ring to land on her butt beside Jenny.

Before anything more happens, FCBA security arrives at the ring, saving Jenny and Gena Lee further humiliation.

Jen and Adrianne shake hands and agree the fight was a lot of fun, "Maybe in a year after we both have a chance to recover." They shake hands laughing and head back to their dressing rooms to get ready to meet the media for their postfight press conferences. Hendricks congratulates Charlize who thanks Christina and Jen for, "staying out of my way."