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Tale of the Tape
Michelle Ryan
Age 39
Height 5’7”
20-25-0

Charlize Theron
48
Height 5’9 1/2”
336-128-12
2 Universal Featherweight Titles 1999. 1999 Titles are not recognized as official
1 MTV 116 Lbs Title 1999
1 Playboy Title. 1999
1Nike 122 Lbs Title 1999
1 Studio Lightweight Title 1999
8 Unified Lightweight Titles
7 Unified Welterweight Titles
1 Unified Middleweight Title
3 Maxim Lightweight Titles
2 Paramount Lightweight Titles\
1 Reebox Lightweight Title
2 Reebox Welterweight Titles
2 Paramount Welterweight Titles
Mistress of the Body Saddle 1/26/08-1/11/15
Original Member of the Hall of Fame
Recognized as the Greatest of all Time (GOAT)

BEFORE

It’s late evening and the sun is going down on the Caribbean Sea and the white sand of the Redneck Riviera beaches. The bleachers, which surround the ring are full of spectators. They are there to see a fight. The only one of the night. They have been entertained for the last hour by a couple good local rock bands. Down the aisle between the bleachers comes a very attractive brunette who climbs into the ring. She drops her robe revealing a firm fitting green bikini. She takes a microphone “For those of you who don’t know who I am, I’m Michelle Ryan. Charlize, being who she is, is able to bar announcers from her fights. She doesn’t want her first name drawn out for five minutes by some loudmouthed guy who like to hear himself talk.

Well six years ago Charlize and I fought. In the fifth, she knocked me down, but I beat the count. Then I knocked her down, but like me, she beat the count, Then I blasted her in the face and her nose started bleeding. I’m not talking a little stream I mean, it was like someone turned the faucet on. I was shocked at how much blood she was losing. The referee immediately stopped the fight, awarded me a TKO. By time he got her to her corner, his shirt was soaked with her blood. I was hyped that I had beaten the GOAT and let that get the best of me and I did some humiliations that I shouldn’t have done and I regretted it later. I fully expected a demand for a rematch but it never came…until a couple month ago. She called and asked it I wanted to fight her. She didn’t phrase is like it was a rematch. Well I said yes and here we are. Michelle’s comments where sent back to Theron’s trailer via iPhone. Charlize commented “that was fair’ and her entourage headed to the ring. In the ring, Charlize dropped her robe revealing the usual red bikini, gloves and boots. She meets Michelle in the center of the ring for the usual instructions which Charlize has now heard 477 times. They touch gloves and head to their corners.

THE FIGHT

Round 1.
At the bell both move to the center of the ring. Charlize starts to push out her usual right jab, but Michelle beats her the the punch with a left jab to the mouth. She follows up with a left cross and a right to the midsection. Charlize manages a right to the head but Michelle takes the play away with a right hook to the chin followed by a left cross sends the blonde to the ropes. Michelle then stuns Charlize with a fight upper cut and a left cross. Charlize has her guard up protecting her face and Michelle goes to the body with a series or punches to the midsection and then to the chest, Charlize is irate and finally catches the brunette with a right cross and follows up with another right and then a left. Once again the brunette takes the play away with a set of body blows ending up with an uppercut to the chin and depositing the blonde back on the ropes. Charlize trys slugging back and the two or suddenly slugging it out. Michelle is getting the best of it landing punches with a two to one advantage. The blonde is beginning to look a little out of it as the bell rings, Ryan’s corner is happy, but the tone is different in Theron’s corner. Kate Upton ranting at the blonde. “What are you doing. Your offense is awful. You defense if pitiful. She has never held a title. You have held at least twenty six. You know what you should do. Now go out there and do it.

Round 2. The two once again meet in the center of the ring. This time it is Charlize who gets in the first punch and the two are face to face swapping punches to the head and body. Charlize is getting the best of it this time. Michelle wants to break it off and turns her back of the blonde. Charlize is in hot pursuit when Michelle turns around with a right cross and lands on the right side of the blonde’s head and Charlize is suddenly back on the ropes. Michelle closes, but Charlize is not as buzzed as Michelle thought and beats the brunette to the punch. A series of cross send the brunette back to the center of the ring where she attempts to make a stand, but is further driven to the ropes. Once again the two are toe to toe slugging it out with neither getting the better of it, but Michelle manages to get off the ropes. The two stay in contact swapping punches to the crowds delight.They separate and move around while catching their breath, Once again they close but the round ends before either could do more damage, In Michelle’s corner they are advising her to continue to work on the body. In Charlize’s corner Upton tells Charlize to take the round off. Make Michelle chase you, but stay away and don’t get into slugging Put some miles on Michelle while conserving energy.

Round 3. At the bell Michelle moves quickly out. She to the middle of the ring while Charlize has moved about a foot from her stool. Michelle wades in to trap Charlize in her corner but those famous legs have moved down the ropes towards the opposite corner Michelle follows and then Charlize gives the brunette a lesson in leg work, Michelle just can’t get Charlize is a punching position. The crowd is getting impatient with Charlize as she gives. the impression she is running from the brunette. One minute left Charlize stops. Michelle continued a few steps as she got ready to punch Charlize out, but the blonde beats her to the punch with a overhand right to the forehead. She follows with a left hook, right cross, left cross right hook and a left cross. The brunette is hurt and tries to avoid Charlize, but with no luck. Charlize pursues the brunette and has her on the ropes. The round ends before Charlize can do any more damage. Ryan’s corner is busy with damage repair while in Theron’s corner Kate the Great tells her fellow blonde, “that was a good job. You know if you can keep that up you may be a decent fighter after all, You got her hurt and confused Time to drop the hammer so I can meet my husband for dinner.”

Round 4. At the bell Michelle quickly moves to the center of the ring. She suddenly stops. She sees that Charlize has only moved a couple feet from her corner and she has dropped her gloves to her waist and starts shaking her arms and rolling her shoulders. Charlize finally raises her gloves and motions Michelle to come in. Michelle closes even though she knows she is closing to fight on Charlize’s terms. Michelle throws an overhand right that sails by Theron’s head. Charlize steps in and drives a left into Michelle’s chest follows with a left and a right to the body. Michelle steps back a couple steps but Charlize is with her and lands left-right to her head. Michelle’s finally lands a punch, a left cross to the jaw. She sees Chalize back up a step, but with a smile on her face. What Michelle didn’t see was Charlize right drop to there waist. Michelle steps in the throw another right while Charlize’s body rotates and the right comes up with Theron’s 126 pounds behind it. It catches all of Michelle’s chin. Charlize turns and walks to her corner to be greeted with hugs by Upton and Neve. They know Michelle is not getting up.No one does after that punch, The count reaches ten and Theron and crew are ready to head back to the trailer while the crowd is still surprised by the sudden ending.

AFTER
Michelle is the first to speak “I really wanted to win this fight more than most. I wanted to beat the GOAT twice, but I didn’t want to beat her the way I beat her six years ago. I didn’t want to see the blood gushing from her nose. I wanted her counted out. In the fourth round, when I saw her stop ad start shaking her arms and rolling her shoulders I didn’t understand what she was doing. Then she waved me in. I was leery but I had no choice because all the audience saw her waive me in, Turned out to be a very bad decision.” Charlize comments “I really don’t have much to say. Michelle gave me a hard time in the first two rounds. Then, Upton suggested U wasted the third which I did. Then she suggested that lille shake the arms routine and then waive Michelle in. I was dubious about it, but she was right and it worked. I want to thank Michelle for taking this fight and who knows, maybe we will do a best of three.”