UNIFIED FLYWEIGHT TITLE

Posted by Simguy on 1/10/2004, 8:44 am.

Before: Co-conquerors of Mish Williams meet to divide the spoils—one of the most underrated rivalries in all boxing is Danes/Packard. “Kelly’s got a lot of resentment towards Claire,” says the editor of “The Fly Paper”, “Early in her career, Danes really targeted Packard—Claire deliberately set out to build her reputation as a fine boxer at Kelly’s expense, and to Packard’s chagrin, Danes has been largely successful in that regard, Claire’s first big win came in an upset over Kelly. Claire’s done well against bigger girls like Britney, Dani and Eliza, and slowly but surely, she’s solidified her reputation as a brilliant ring technician in her own right. Packard used to be able to laugh Claire off—she can’t do that anymore and it really galls her that Danes has emerged the way she has.” Kelly in black bikini. Claire in red bra style bikini from “Breakdown Palace.”

During R1: Cautious opening—Packard stepping to her left until Claire turns southpaw—girls cutting each other off, feinting, measuring reflexes. End of minute one—Claire steps out, sells like she’s legging to her left and SMOKES KELLY THE LOOK-AWAY RIGHT HOOK! Sneaky southpaw swipe grazes temple, but shakes Packard’s taut booty—Kelly staggering to the ropes, steadying herself with a hand in the top strand, then covering up as CLAIRE STORMS IN! Danes sells the right hook, sells a feigned left hand Antonio Tarver style, THEN brings the hook, catching Kelly on the left eye, stunning her again—Packard wilting to her right along the ropes. Claire edges in close, shifting to orthodox on the inside, reaching her left to push back Kelly’s right bicep, exposing that precious breadbasket—DANES ROMPS AMIDSHIPS! Claire keeping her right elbow in tight to her hip, just wiping short, sidearm shots to Kelly’s tight abs, sternum and brazen jugs—little Packard gut shot—crying out, stooped forward and KELLY GOES DOWN! Kelly beaten to her knees, slumps onto her right hip, blubbering, trying to push herself up, but it’s not happening! DEVASTATING KO1 Claire Danes—you don’t see THAT box score every day.

After: Wow—sensational brisket-licking leaves Kelly in ruins! Danes merciless, rapacious as she gathers a shellshocked Packard up for a glorious walk of shme—it’s the Germans marching into Paris all over again. Kelly put on show—Claire displaying her beaten prize with vindictive glee and pouring it on postfight. “The war between Kelly Packard and Claire Danes in OVER!” Claire trumpets. “KO1 baby! Kelly’s finally, totally, irrevocably overthrown. All the years of keeping me down are over—I’ve thrown off the shackles and heaped a terrible beating on her—she’s ruined! Finished!” Camera catches many serious, frowning flyweight superstars in the audience—Danes’ treatment of well respected Kelly not sitting well with the pros—the swagger, the undeniable shock-dominance displayed, brings back memories of an almost Liu-like tyranny.

Reposted by Archer 3/15/10.