Posted by Simguy on 8/20/2004, 5:49 pm.

Before: Clash of civilizations--Burton being developed as a wiry boxer with class--Rachel a brash, free swinging little slugger who made her bones in party brawls and yacht fights. Hilarie gaining attention for a spirited stand against Demi Moore in her debut--BLONDE! Magazine already dubbing hilly the next Keira Knightley or Jaime Pressly--Burton trying to restore a little perspective in preflight.

“Look--I love the support, don’t get me wrong, but it’s ridiculous to put me in Pressly or Knightley’s class right now. I’m in tough with Bilson: those girls would demolish Rachel--I need time to develop my talent and learn my craft, just like any other girl.”

Bilson not as concerned with developing and honing--she just wants to fight. “Hilarie’s already boring me,” Rachel quips, “blah blah blah technique, Blah blah blah skills, point me at her, cut me loose--fight’s over! We all want to be special, but you know what? Most of us aren’t. I already have a huge leg up on Hilarie because I’ve got the ‘FCBA Look’--you know what I’m talking about. Burton’s a stick-girl with permanent bad hair--I’m always going to get more attention than she does and that’s just the way it is. The fact I’m going to knock her out just makes me that much more attractive.”

Burton in black sports bra, red and black plaid bikini cut trunks--Bilson in red bikini, halter style top, twist tied, sporty bottoms with white belt, punching ponytail.

During R1: Bilson rocketing out of the blocks--swinging right hands to Burton’s head. Hilarie managing the pressure with textbook boxing--hard stick, pivot step left--a little robotic, but technically sound as she keeps Rache at the en of the poke, creates distance, and gets an angle on the brunette. Rachel getting a facial, but ignoring it, recklessly remounting her attacks despite a low connect percentage and down the stretch--pressure pays off. Final moments see Burton finally hounded to the ropes--she’s covered up, face in gloves, right there for Bilson’s punches as Rachel lets her hands go. Round a draw, bith women having their way at points.

R2: Rachel with swinging rights and lefts backs Burton to the ropes--Bilson heaving leather up into the flanks, skidding swat across the shoulders and head of a momentarily disorganized Burton. Hilarie on her heels, can’t get her stance or balance, soaking up clout--she guts up and starts slugging off the ropes! Burton, Bilson, Burton, Bilson--girls trade hooks, crosses, uppercuts on the chin as Hilarie steadily punches her way back t midring. Down the stretch, Bilson’s bravado broken--she turns her head, falters into the ropes--Burton releasing the hounds--she’s loving it on Bilson--wide, slappy left hooks and a piercing, short right hand on the chin have Rachel a-swooning at the bell.

R3: Hilarie earned respect in the second--Bilson tentative, not as free-wheeling now--Burton settles into a boxer’s rhythm. Hilly upright, stepping left, leaning in t poke the lead right, scraping the jab across Bilson’s brow, turning the brunette, beating her to punches. Rachel frowning, out at the end of the stick, gloves are up, but she’s flustered, not coming forward. Bell to bell Hilly, poking, prodding, occasionally stinging Bilson with the right hand down the middle--rangy goodness from a blonde fawn just learning to gallop.

R4: More class from Burton, more wilt from Bilson. Rachel gritting her teeth, lifting her hands, weight on her right foot--she’s still not coming forwards or releasing punches, Burton with deliberate step and poke--working behind the jab, poking the right cross. Burton mixing things up a little--she’ll occasionally circle to the right to make Rachel move her feet, and she’s looking for left uppercuts off the jab as Bilson keeps her hands up at her temples. Another shutout Burton--rangy blonde has imposed her style and will on the opponent

R5: Bilson moist-eyed, breaking down mentally--she just can’t get to Burton and Hilarie positively heartless in pressing the advantage. Crunching jabs-one at a time, but piercing the defense starting to back Bilson up--Burton able to move forward in good order, keep her feet and thrust home hard right cross to split the mitts, minute mark--gorgeous sequence for Hilarie as she finally commits to combo-punching: jab, right hand, rigid, slender-armed left uppercut catches Rachel prettily on the chin, Bilson’s legs giving way--it’s a jail break below the brunette’s waist and blonde piles on. Stroking wide hooks and that jamming, short right on the face--Bilson sits stung in the ropes, helpless to prevent the face-punching and THE REF STEPS IN! TKOP5 in splendid fashion, Hilarie Burton.

After: Bilson in shock--she takes maybe 2 minutes of the entire fight, badly, deeply, thoroughly outclassed by a fellow ingénue with maybe less combative experience, but more intensive schooling as technique proves decisive, Hilarie grinning, happy in post fight, but still trying to calm the BLONDE! mag sycophants who have her plaque ready for the Hall of Fame already. “I did what I wanted to do with Rachel--I knew she’d come out swinging and I dealt with it. I feel really food, but I’m keeping things in perspective--Rachel Bilson’s beach meat at best and obviously I should handle a girl like that. If you talk about other rookies, I’m comfortable saying that I’m the head of the class, but I’ve got a long way to go to get where I want to be.”

Reposted by Archer 1/16/11.