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28 Janaury 2011 Kaley Cuoco vs Anne Hathaway

Page history last edited by Archer844 12 years, 11 months ago

Kaley Cuoco 04.jpg Anne Hathaway 04.jpg

Posted by simguy on 1/28/2011, 12:42 pm

Before: Cat women teaming up to get Kaley beat: former BSE member and Cat woman alumni Halle Berry imparting her Kaley-busting know-how to team Hathaway. "I'm thrilled to have Halle in camp," Anne confides in prefight. "She knows Kaley's game inside and out from BSE days, and she's also just been such a boost to me physically and emotionally. I'm coming in 20 pounds lighter than I was fighting at before - all of it sleek hard muscle courtesy of Halle's training regimen...I can't wait to cut loose on Kaley Cuoco!" Cuoco non-plussed - exchanging more hard glares with Berry than Hathaway...she's obviously disturbed by the weight of A-list beef opposing her. "You'd think that with all the success Halle's had, she'd be more secure," Kaley says at podium. "But the thing is - no matter how hot you are, how much fame you have...any celebrity wants to back up her shit in the ring. I get it: Halle's boxing really took a nose-dive when BSE broke up, while mine has skyrocketed...that must suck for her. But I don't like her going behind my back to train my opponents, and I think it's pretty shabby that Ann's going to have to pay the price. Get ready guys: Catwoman's gonna get her ears bobbed big time in this one!" Kaley in black bikini; small black mitts; hair in twisty bun with bangs/ringlets framing face. Anne in leather bra style bikini top; leopard print bottoms; small black mitts.

During R1: Anne quick and sharp midring - jotting out jabs in swift triplets; dropping right hand chasers. None of it lands: Kaley weaving on her hips - dipping forward/leaning back - her hands dangling at her sides as she makes Ann miss, then cuffing Hathaway either mitt off the counter. Head and body - Kaley scoring at will, then slipping shots/pivoting around, turning Anne on the spot. Midway through, Kaley slips a jab - making Ann's fist miss over blonde left shoulder while Cuoco drags a left into Annie's tits. Short right Cuoco tags Ann's chin, straightening her up: exchange of hooks goes Kaley's way as she rings Annie up flush to face. Hathaway's back (right) foot skids out of position - that right leg all rubbery as she tries to plant/reorganize her stance. Kaley chops another swift right to chin, catching Annie as she's stepping funky...Hathaway tottering to her right in confusion. Kaley hops-with - slap-chopping the right at Anne's mouth, then licking her a curling hook - toggling Annie's chin and SITTING HER DOWN! Cuoco grinning pretty, scampering to neutral corner: A-list beauty gets up shaky, blinking eyes out of sync. Wobbly 8, Anne Hathaway: Kaley quick-pouncing in, feinting, jabbing the tummy, scooting out of range: Hathaway dug in at apron, hands at temples. Blonde girl darting in and out - tormenting and vexing: she's twitching cutey-pie swats off her hips, licking Annie either hand, clouting Hathaway about the ears, or swiping hot strokes across her tummy. Bell: Kaley whirls away, pleased as punch; Annie wide eyed, badly rocked...she stumbles back to her corner wobbly butt.

R2: Anne shows heart, gets herself together: she comes out right hand at cheek, left hand probing jabs. Hathaway's form textbook perfect - she's obviously put some quality hours into her gymwork, but that jab's dotting air as Kaley bobs and weaves on supple hips. Cuoco's head frequently at Anne's waist level...blonde girl pivoting around, swatting Annie's flat tummy to get her flustered as Hathaway continues to miss. Minute mark - Kaley up out of the crouch and twisting torso-right licks a wicked hook across Annie's mouth, putting her wobbly butt! Hathaway stepping in fence post holes, eyes brimming: Kaley sidesteps right, feints to get Annie stooping forward in earmuff, then blonde girl deploys vicious buggy-whip right hand LOUD to Annie's hip/lower back. Hathaway sobbing, knees buckling...she shies away hurt. Kaley in hopping pursuit: lead right hand buzzes past Ann's mouth spooking her upright; follow on leaping hook smash-rebounds off Anne's face, putting her to sleep. Hathaway's legs fold - she collapses to her back, her head inches from neutral corner. Stricken A-lister picks head up off canvas, eyelashes fluttering, but rest of her body is all KO'd. KO2 in spectacular fashion - Kaley Cuoco.

After: Delighted Cuoco leaps into her corner turnbuckles to blow kisses to the audience: sensational Biel-like performance overshadows much-improved Hathaway technical form. Anne coming in a little light...was that the wrong idea against the lightning-quick Cuoco? "You know, she was very trim and quick," Kaley admits in postfight - face glowing, untouched, "but making the fight be about speed really played to my strengths. I hurt her with every clean shot - she just couldn't handle my power - and that's probably Berry's fault. Halle thinks speed's the answer, but slimming a girl down doesn't necessarily make her a roadrunner, you know?" Kaley, Kaley - after such an electrifying performance, would you be considered Top Gun at Medallion now? Over Jessica Biel? "I've always, always been Alpha over Biel," Kaley says, bright eyes challenging anyone to argue. "She struggles with B competition, while I annihilate it...I mean - isn't it obvious who's clicking on all cylinders, and who's sputtering? I'm lead girl - Jessi's got a job as my wing woman anytime she wants it. All she has to do is beg!"