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27 February 2011 Sarah Chalke vs Katy Perry

Page history last edited by Archer844 12 years, 8 months ago

Sarah Chalke 01.jpg Katy Perry 01.jpg

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on 2/27/2011, 12:00 am

Anarchy at the Ayslum

(Asylum Arena. Philadephia, Pennsylvania)

BEFORE:

"Sarah CHALKE?" Katy says, shaking her head. "When Wiz first told me I thought he meant Sarah CARTER. I had to look this girl up on the internet! Turns out she's some sitcom actress from the 90s they call 'Fake Becky'! Well, when Katy Perry's done, 'Fake Becky' will have a REAL concussion!"

"Perry thinks she's something special," Sarah says with a smile, "But she's really just an unschooled brawler IN the ring, and a flash-in-the-pan pop star out of it. She doesn't know who I am? Well, after tonight's boxing lesson, she'll be VERY familiar with Sarah Chalke and intimately aquainted with her fists!"

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Back at ringside for our third bout of the night, featuring BBU's Sarah Chalke vs. The Santa Barbara Slugger, Katy Perry. "

McCarthy: "Classic boxer/puncher match up, it looks like. Katy's a slight favorite, but neither girl has a lot of FCBA experience, so this could go either way."

O'Dell: "And there's the bell and Katy right to the offensive! She's after Sarah, walking right through the blonde's jabs, throwing hard stuff that's got Chalke backpedalling."

McCarthy: "Sarah's got to get into a stance here, so she can get some power behind those punches."

O'Dell: "Katy not letting her do it, hounding Chalke. Landing a hard right to the ribs. Sarah in full retreat here as Perry stalks and tries to cut off the ring. Chalke flicks a jab that Katy walks through. Perry fires a hard right that Sarah leans away from, follows up with a left hook to the midsection that brought a gasp from the blonde. Sarah can't keep Katy off! PERRY LANDS A RIGHT HOOK AND DOWN GOES SARAH!"

McCarthy: "Landed that clean, Jenny! This may be over!"

O'Dell: "It's not! There's the bell and it may have saved Sarah who's still down."

McCarthy: "Check the telestrator on this hook. Chalke was doing a pretty good job of circling back to stay away from Katie's power, but, right here she takes two steps directly backward. That allows Katy to find the range and...BAM. I don't think Chalke beats the count, but we'll never know."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Chalke off her stool looking a bit shabby and on comes Katy! Perry winging punches, bounces a right off Sarah's head. Chalke chased back to the ropes. Katy bangs a left hook to the kidney, slams a right to the chin. Chalke's legs wobble. She clinches, trying to hold Perry's arms down. Katy shoves out of it and lets her hands go! Snaps back Chalke's head with right cross, sticks a left jab into her face. Sarah in an earmuff, but Katy's hammering away at the guard, buffeting Chalke along the ropes. Sarah sagging into the ropes. Not fighting back. Katy digs an uppercut into the midsection, whistles a right off of Chalke's head, slams a left hook into her chest, snaps her head to the side with a right cross...and that's it! The referee has seen enough! He cradles Sarah to safety! It's a bruising TKO2 for Katy Perry!"

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring with J-Mac and our winner, Katy Perry!"

McCarthy: "Nothing pretty about what you did tonight, was there, Katy?"

Katy: "I think it was PRETTY effective! Seriously, though, I wasn't going to get cute. I knew I was too strong for her. There were only two ways this could end. I was either going to stop her with a big punch or she was just going to fold up from the punishment. And, when you think about it, both things happened. God, you've got to love these BBU girls! They all have one thing in common. None of them can beat Katy Perry!"