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8 May 2011 Jamie Chung vs Lindsay Lohan

Page history last edited by Archer844 12 years, 8 months ago

Jamie Chung 01.jpg Lindsay Lohan 03.jpg

Celebrity Boxing After Dark

Posted by simguy on 5/8/2011, 9:52 am

BEFORE: "I'm gonna blow the doors off Lilo!" Jamie chirps happily in prefight. "Ever since Annalyne McCord put Lilo on her face, girls have been lining up to get some, and I want my piece. I'm bendier, I'm hotter, and punching her out puts me right at the top of girls-to-watch in 2011!" Lilo attending press confernce in clingy white court-room dress: sleek, professional Lindsay playing the professional card. "I stabilized my front against Christina," Lilo announces in calm tones, "and I'll continue my advance through Jamie. This isn't going to be another starlet using me to get what she wants. Lindsay Lohan is back in the using-girls business, and brother, business is a-BOOMIN'!" Lilo in healthy white sport top; baby blue crochet bikini bottoms (tawdry); white gloves; sleek low ponytail long down her back. Jamie in black/white horizontal barred bikini with candy-cane strings; white gloves; lush black hair shiny, loose, curly.

During R1: Girls step-to jabbing, then stand in front of each other, bending and dipping on their hips to create supple angles while flat-footed. Girls will weave to their right - get good angles on opposing left flank, and one or the other will slap home a lanky right hand. Girls will weave torso-left, then lash home lanky left hooks to svelte torsos. Dipping and slipping, Jamie will frisk Lilo's top via here-I-am jabs: Lohan scowling, jabbing at Chung's face, then deploying a rigid, palm-up, shoveling right with a slight sidearm action - slugging Chung out of her positions. Sinewy competitive fare...Lilo a little more aggressive, a little more likely to step forward as Jamie proves hard to hit upstairs.

R2: Same thing - leggy girls jabbing on approach, then going flat footed to weave-and-dip torsos in sinewy fashion - lashing each other's flanks out of the slip. Minute mark - Jamie leans torso-right, slinging a sinuous hook to Lilo's chin: while blonde girl's blinking, brunette dips torso-right, clapping a willowy right ear-to-chin upside Lindsay's head! LILO'S HURT! Leggy blonde all stampin' and poutin', jugs a-jumpin': Chung grinning like a little brat - reaching her left hand out to cuff at tummy and tits. Linds hurt, angry, trying to slug her way out of trouble: Chung dipping and swiveling on liquid hips, making Lilo miss head shots, then stroking her gorgeous, slashing shots body/head. Linds stumbling forward after being clouted: Jamie pivoting to the side, changing levels, sliding out of range...classy stuff from brunette newcomer has Lindsay reaching, paying through 2.

R3: Lilo still a little shook up: Jamie grinning, getting after rickety blonde. Chung's elbows in, hands up/relaxed - there's a snappy, whippy action to her punches as she samples Lindsay's ribcage with either hand. Dipping side to side, Chung helping herself to Lilo's torso - stroking the tummy, lashing the flanks...poor Lindsay grimacing, legs trembling. Minute mark - Jamie weaves torso-right, eyes wide as Lilo bends forward in earmuff: Chung deploys vicious, rubber-hose buggywhip right hand in above Lindsay's left hip, shouting "HAH!" at the impact. BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Lindsay sobbing out, dropping to all fours: Jamie brightening, shouting "IT'S OVER!" as ref's pushing her away. Lilo beats count, blinking away tears: ON COMES JAMIE! Wretched minutes for Lilo ensue - proud former champ whipped and lashed along ropes as she holds a ragged earmuff in place...Jamie just treating herself to Lilo's torso with bandy-armed wallops. Late the round - Lilo desperately hurt, reaching her left arm out to pull Jamie in: Chung keeps hips well back, deploys both arms in whack-whack-whack batting fashion underneath as poor Lilo baby-steps forward. BLONDE GIRL DOWN! Lindsay open-mouthed as slender-limbed licks smoke her tummy/ribs underneath...she drops gasping to all fours, head bowed. Jamie steps in behind with wicked smile, plows in with right arm in between Lilo's legs - the right shoulder pushing into buttock on follow through - driving Lindsay onto her face and low-blowing her all at once! Crowd in uproar - ref pulling Jamie out of the heap...limber Asian escorted to her corner and given a terrific shake by the ref as poor Lindsay's rolling onto her side, hands at crotch, face pinched.

R4: Lilo grim, ashen-faced: Jamie smug, smirking. Girls rotate clockwise - Jamie jabbing Lilo's raised guard/face via swift left hands. Minute in, Lilo finally times the poke, answers-back a sudden left hook: Chung chin-checked, stepping in fence post holes! Lilo leans in, shovels right hand to golden-brown tummy; swipes across a tight hook to humble offending jugs. Jamie staggering back to ropes, hands in earmuff: she cries out as Lilo steps-to and SHELLACKS the waistline a rangy-limbed right/left. Lilo using chickenwing left elbow to nudge Jamie upright: slinging right hand shovel-punch bounces off Chung's abs, spanking her butt-in-ropes. Wide right lands lanky in behind Jamie's left elbow; dip-n'-dig left snatches at tummy, winning a grunt of pain from Asian. Lilo on her girl rangy - using elbows to prop Jamie up, then slashing and snapping away at her. Long blonde ponytail brushing freckled back as Lindsay beats her starlet without mercy. Bell: Lilo whirling on her heels...breath-of-blonde ponytail draws across Jamie's gobsmacked face like a whispered insult...Sarah Carter stamping her foot in the audience, mortified at how well Lilo did that!

R5: Jamie spends the whole break weeping and whining: she comes out for the fifth looking reluctant. Not so Lilo: Lohan into Chung with a wide, swinging right to flank on the lean-in - Lohan up out of the crouch with a tasty hook to brush Jamie back. Ropes: Lilo pressing the attack to Chung's body, bending in to sweep the right to Jamie's ribs, then hooking Jamie's right ear the rangy left. Lanky right uppercut slices through the middle, kissing Jamie's lips, straightening her: CLAPPING left hook toggles her chin! Poor Jamie swaying, badly chin-checked - hands out to either side in gull wing as her lashes blink in confusion. Lilo knuckling her left in Jamie's tits to stabilize, then leaning in all bendy-backed to kiss a crashing right to chin! DOWN GOES JAMIE! Plastering blast knocks her head back over top rope, then she's slopping down to her left, plowing in face-first, fast asleep, long body parallel to ropes. KO5 in crashing fashion, Lindsay Lohan!

AFter: Lilo busted up, but triumphant - snarky glance-down at Jamie's slender, conquered back shows the seething pride in Lohan's eyes. "Just a taste of things to come," Lilo promises in postfight, hands on hips, jugs heavy in that white top. "The easy-picking on Lindsay Lohan is over and done...girls who step to me now are stepping into a beating, and that's all there is to it!"