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20 May 2011 Kelly Clarkson vs Amanda Sheffield

Page history last edited by Archer844 12 years, 7 months ago

Kelly Clarkson.jpg Amanda Seyfried 05.jpg

Posted by simguy on 5/20/2011, 9:17 am

Results: Simguy Writing: The Wiz

BEFORE:

"Seyfried's not managed fighter material, and her management is figuring that out," a hard-eyed Kelly says. "That's why they're feeding her to me. After I lay her out, they'll have the excuse they need to fire her and bring in some fresh talent. And, hey, I'm always happy to help weed out some of the wannabes."

"Look, I've been hearing the criticism. I've heard all the jackals talking about how I suck and they should have my spot," Amanda says, shaking her head. "Well, they're wrong, and so is Kelly. I have no doubt Clarkson thinks she's going to bully me around in there, stop me, get me fired. She'd love that. Because she knows I'm hotter and a bigger star than she is. But it's not going to happen. Because I'm also BETTER than she is. She doesn't know THAT. But she's about to find out."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Back at ring side, Jenny O'Dell with Jenny McCarthy, and. Mac, the oddsmakers make Clarkson the favorite here..."

McCarthy: "I've got to agree with them. She's a full bantam. Seyfried usually fights at fly. She's in heavier than usual for this one so she doesn't get pushed around out there, but I still see Kelly as the favorite."

O'Dell: "Well, there's 'Mama Mia' blaring from the speakers and here comes Amanda..."

McCarthy: "'Waterloo' might be more appropriate."

O'Dell: "Who knew you knew your ABBA so well, Mac..."

McCarthy: "It's not ABBA I know so well. It's The Grand Weirdo, and I know he's a flavor-of-the-month type, and if Seyfried loses tonight, he'll be on to black raspberry!"

O'Dell: "And 'Miss Independent' now booming out, and that's Kelly Clarkson coming down to the ring. Both fighters in there now, the referee handling the preliminaries..."

McCarthy: "Wonder if either of these ladies signed up for 'The Gauntlet'."

O'Dell: "That's a good question, Mac, but, for the moment, they're concentrating on one another. There's the bell and we're underway in the first and these two curvy beauties are right at each other, banging away inside, bumping and slugging inside..."

McCarthy: "There isn't any beauty in this, but it can be effective. Good left hook to the ribs right there by Kelly. Amanda fires back with a right to the side of the head."

O'Dell: "Not much defense going on, Mac. These two just having at one another, banging away, using the elbows and forearms, shoving, scrubbing gloves across faces. Solid left to the body again for Clarkson. Good follow up right. Seyfried with a hook to the ribs. There's the bell. Both ladies had their moments, but I think it was Kelly's round."

McCarthy: "Sure was. Clarkson busier. More effective."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "There's the bell for the second and we're right back to brawling here. Both ladies letting their hands go, banging in short rights and lefts, right in each other's faces. Working the head and the body. Shoving, bumping, stumbling."

McCarthy: "Clarkson's determined to impose her will on Amanda here. Not going to let a smaller woman stand toe to toe and get away with it."

O'Dell: "Seyfried not backing up a step, though. Good right from Amanda! That got Kelly's attention! Seyfried bangs a left hook to the midsection, follows with a right to the side of the head. Amanda backing Kelly up...LEFT HOOK WOBBLED CLARKSON! Kelly's hurt! Amanda letting her hands go! Kelly trying to cover up! RIGHT HAND LANDS CLEAN! DOWN GOES CLARKSON! Seyfried to a neutral corner. Referee picks up the count at three. Clarkson getting to her feet at six. She takes the count, nods that she's OK to continue, and here comes Amanda! Seyfried all in as Clarkson's backed up to the ropes. Kelly firing back now. Amanda not letting up, but Kelly's giving as good as she gets as the bell sounds. Big second round for Seyfried, but Kelly able to rally off the canvas, Mac!"

McCarthy: "Let's take a look at the replay, and here's the key punch. It's a short left hook to the chin and you can see Kelly's knees wobble. Amanda could have been a lot more surgical at this point. Instead, she just starts throwing, and most of the stuff misses or gets blocked but then comes the right hand right HERE. Clean, hard shot that sends Clarkson to the mat. Big round for Amanda."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Back to live action in round three, and Kelly showing no ill effects from that knockdown. Surging forward, banging away at Seyfried, forcing Amanda back."

McCarthy: "This has been Clarkson's game plan all along. She's bigger and heavier. She doesn't think Amanda can hold canvas."

O'Dell: "And right now, Kelly's correct. Amanda banging back, but Clarkson having her way, forcing Seyfried backward, imposing her will on...DOWN GOES CLARKSON! DOWN GOES CLARKSON!"

McCarthy: "It's OVER! She's not getting up from that!"

O'Dell: "A perfect short right hook to the chin and Kelly just fell forward on her face! She's not moving at all as the count reaches eight...nine...ten! That's it!"

McCarthy: "You said it, Jenny. A PERFECT short right. Amanda catches Kelly coming forward and lands right on the chin. Clarkson's lights go out immediately. Huge punch and a huge win for Amanda Seyfried by KO3 over Kelly Clarkson."

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring where Jenny McCarthy has our winner, Amanda Seyfried."

McCarthy: "Amanda, a lot of people said this was going to be your 'Waterloo', but it just may have been your 'Arrival'."

Seyfried: "It was a big win for me. She's tough, there's no doubt about that, and she thought she could push me around out there. Well, she tried it and she paid for it. She found out that there's a reason they call me 'Assassin'."