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28 August 2011 Danni Minogue vs Kylie Minogue

Page history last edited by Archer844 12 years, 4 months ago

Danni Minogue.jpg Kylie Minogue 02.jpg

AWUBA (Australian Women's Underground Boxing Assn) Bout

Posted by Baudo on 8/28/2011, 9:21 am

Ladies and Gentlemen please welcome to the ring, fighting out of the blue corner, weighing in at 110lbs, the Director of Communications at Downunder Boxing….Kylie Minogue.

And in the red corner, weighing in at 119lbs, the Assistant Director of Communications at Downunder Boxing ….Jessica Marais

Abbie: Hi everyone I am Abbie Cornish stepping in for Danni at Centre Ring and I am here with Danni. How do you feel about this fight with your sister?

Danni: A bit nervous. We have never fought in the ring before. Lots of fighting over hair brushes and make up but never any fisty cuffs.

Abbie: Good luck then Danni. And Kylie, any quick comments?

Kylie: I just hope we put on a good fight. The last two have been insane so we have to keep the momentum up.

Abbie: Ok over to you Baudo

Cole: Thanks Abbie. Cheryl Cole stepping in for Baudo…

Danni: WHAT THE F%&K? Cheryl Cole? What are you doing in the chair!!

Cole: Oh I thought a little bit of added pressure might make it interesting for you Danni. Hearing my voice over the PA should make sure Kylie knocks you out. Then you will be primed for a beating by me.

Danni: This is outrageous. Where’s Baudo? I want her head on a plate!!

(Security contain Danni from leaping out of the ring)

Cole: Did you s%&t your pants before the fight Danni, this chair stinks?

Danni: SLUT!!!

Cole: Both girls meet at centre ring, Kylie looking fit and ready for this, the Plastic Whore looking every bit of 39.

Abbie: Did you see the way she looked at you then Cheryl? You better hope you’re a better boxer than a sledger.

Cole: Danni Minogue is a “never will be”

Abbie: Did you know she is coming off 5 straight KO wins in the AWUBA?

Cole: What?

Round 1

Abbie: The sisters meet mid ring, Kylie jabbing cautiously as Danni steps and dances away,

Cole: BORING!!!
Abbie: Kylie getting in close now, pushing Danni with her left and jabbing with the right to the body. Kylie working Danni’s midsection. Danni tucking in and backing up early.

Cole: You’ve got nothing Danni!!

Abbie: Commentate or get out of here Cole.

Cole: Plastic Whore taking it to the stomach, she backs away to the ropes. Kylie all over her b###h of a sister, throwing all the punches. Kylie working to a plan, jab and hooking to the Plastic Whore’s mid section.

Danni: GET HER OUT OF THAT COMMENTARY BOX!! BAUDO?!?!

Cole: Not only have I got under her skin but Kylie is teaching her Plastic Whore sis a lesson. She is copping a pounding at the ropes, UPPERCUT TO THE CHIN KYLIE MINOGUE…the Plastic Whore rocked by that shot and there go her knees. This is fantastic, the Plastic Whore has no chin!!

Baudo: Righto you….OUTTA HERE!! Cole the next time I see you in this building you will be in the ring with the entire Downunder roster!!

(security drag Cheryl Cole away kicking and screaming)

Abbie: Kylie goes to town on her younger sisters mid section, Danni trying to work of the ropes on shaky legs. Danni clinches just before Kylie can get the uppercut through. Danni quick to rotate out of the clinch and clips THE UPPERCUT to Kylies nose. Minogue girls exchanging blows midring. Kylie showing quicker feet, gets out of the way of Danni’s right hook and buries her own LEFT HOOK to Danni’s jaw. DANNI ROCKED again, back to the corner and Kylie is all in at Danni’s mid section but there is the bell.

Baudo: Terribly sorry about that Abbie but that Cole woman locked me in the ladies room.

Abbie: What were you doing in the ladies room?

Baudo: I wasn’t…..she…..Who is she anyway?…..I’ve never even heard of her.

Abbie: We will sort her out in good time. I think she was in a UK all girl band but they mustn’t have been very good.

Baudo: What like STEPS?

Abbie: Nah, worse than them. Anyway great round there to Kylie. Dominating the round although Danni did look great once she got off the ropes. Elle’s corner enjoying a bit of success early on this time

Baudo: From what I saw it did appear Kylie was on top. Danni was on shaky legs at the bell.

Round 2

Abbie: Underway again in the second and Danni is forward and jabbing this time, denying Kylie. Kylie pushing the jab but Danni keeps her at bay shoving her at the shoulders. Danni pounding the left jab to Kylie’s face, brings in the right jab and Kylies unsettled Baudo.

Baudo: She is Abbie, trying to come forward but can’t advance through her sisters jab. Kylie frustrated, cops a solid jab on the chin, but keeps coming forward, bobbing now to try and duck Danni’s jabs.

Abbie: She needs to throw something.

Baudo: Danni in control, pumping the jab to Kylies face, then releases a walloping right cross to Kylie’s chin, KYLIE STUMBLES TO THE ROPES, she covers up immediately.

Abbie: She’s hurt Baudo.

Baudo: Danni standing tall over Kylie who is buckled up, Danni crouches and catches Kylie with the right uppercut, once, twice, three times, KYLIE MINOUGE IN A DAZE, closed eyes and mouth wide she falls onto Danni and hits the deck, face first.

Abbie: Those three uppercuts were brutal. She was all buckled over there and even though the first one got glove, the next two got through.

Baudo: Kylie on her knees at 6, but I don’t think she will beat the count.

Abbie: She is up, she is a little fighter.

Baudo: Danni shaking her head at her big sister who nurses a red swollen face and a split lip.

Abbie: ON COMES DANNI, straight jabs getting through weak gloves and Kylie is belted back to her corner.

Baudo: Sensing Danni’s sixth straight KO win here Ab.

Abbe: Kylie sitting in the corner, hiding behind her gloves, Danni on her front foot drives the hooks into her sisters body, DANNI RUTHLESS continuous pounding of Kylies bare stomach. KYLIES KNEES BUCKLE!! Danni propping her up with tidy uppercuts, leaning in and propping her up with her forearm, drives in a couple more big hooks to the stomach then steps away….

Danni: GET A GOOD LOOK AT THIS COLE!!!

Baudo: Danni slings in the left hook, KYLIE’S HEAD SWIVELS RIGHT, she hangs there for a minute and DANNI FIRES THE RIGHT HOOK…KYLIE MINOGUE DOWN AND OUT!! Kylie goes rigid, stiff as an ironing board and falls to her side. She’s out!!

Abbie: Merciless KO of her sister there. Danni Minogue destroying Kylie by KO in round 2.

Baudo: Kylie never really stood a chance. Although she was on the front foot and controlled the first round, she never really had what it took to win that fight.

Abbie: Danni is just red hot at the moment. I don’t think there is a fighter in any AWUBA Division that wants to fight her at the moment.

Baudo: Well she fights Sam Schoers for the AWUBA Super Bantamweight Title in 6 weeks, that is sure to be a bottler. Over to you Eddie

Eddie: Well the Downunder girls are not short of a knockout punch. Danni Minogue dismantling Kylie at the end of the second round.

Danni that was brutal. There’s obviously no love lost there.

Danni: Oh..(showing genuine concern) I hope she is ok. That Cheryl Cow Cole whatever her name is really got my blood boiling and Kylie copped it.

Eddie: Kylie is in the hands of the trainers but she looks ok. She had you in trouble early.

Danni: Yeah I wasn’t expecting that sort of power from the old girl but she got a couple of sneaky ones in.

Kylie: The old girl!! Who are you calling the old girl?

Danni: Are you ok sis?

Kylie: Yeah I’m fine well done Danni. How about Danni Minogue….6 fights 6 wins 6 KO’s. Lookout Sam Schoers.

Eddie: Well it’s all rosy up here, back to you Craig.