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12 October 2009 Kelly Carlson vs Carmen Electra

Page history last edited by Archer844 14 years, 3 months ago

BOXING ON THE BEACH

Posted by simguy on 10/12/2009, 9:20 am

BEFORE: (editorial deets for Archer: backdate fight to Aug 26/2009; JOD manager of Kelly Carlson as per Kelly's last beach bout).

"It's the fight I've always wanted," Kelly says all bright eyed and greedy. "Carmen's on my 'hot-but-shot' list, but she's still 'Carmen Electra', you know? When you want to make a splash in this space, you fight Carmen - it's that simple. With Melrose Place behind me, I'm finally getting the spotlight I've always deserved: pasting Carmen's going to launch the Kelly Carlson era at long last!" Electra definitely a hottie-on-a-bubble: lengthy losing streak a bitter pill for former pound-for-pound starlet to swallow these days. "I've always been a target," Carmen shrugs, "and I've always met these girls head on. Kelly wants her shot - fine with me: I'll bury her dreams in the sand!" Outdoor Malibu venue - converted beach volleyball court - regulation ring set up/bleachers. Kelly in white bikini; small white gloves; hair in curly tousle. Carmen in white bikini with diagonal-running blue stripes, solid white waist band; small white gloves; hair straight/soft - tinted dirty blonde.

During R1: Kelly aggressive taking the fight immediately to Electra with hooks to tummy PAK! PAK! then clubbing hooks up top. Carmen dukes up, blocking headshots: she retreats to ropes, grimacing as Kelly tries to split the mitts via straight one-two. Carlson settles in - ripping left/right/right at Carmen's waist, then trying her up top with stubby right hands. Electra sluggish, not offering back: she's moping on the ropes, showing earmuff, letting herself get all worked over. Carlson in rhythm: pushing on Carm to reset; punishing her waistline methodical; coming of the body to scrape uppercuts along the facial guard...steady work breaking Carmen down. Electra sliding to her right - defences starting to wilt: Kelly's chippy uppercuts starting to find face, loosening Carm up. Down the stretch, Electra butt-in-ropes, keeping hands up but limply so: Kelly all bright-eyed, hyper-aggressive as she lets hands go. Pumping left uppercuts take Carmen in her breasts: Electra just sick about it, but not moving her hands! Chopping, close-in right crosses clip across Carmen's jaw: good head-swivel sees Electra just facing into shots. Poor Carmen shabby, staring: Kelly just leaning in close, ripping and tearing and clipping away and THE REF STEPS IN! TKO1 on the beach - Kelly Carlson!

After: Jubilation for Carlson: she leaps and squeals, all her wildest dreams fulfilled as she doesn't just get a Carmen Electra fight - she absolutely creams the long time beach queen. Electra distraught, unable to punch back or defend herself: she's just a shell of the girl who once terrorized the FCBA's small-bodied set. WALK OF SHAME: Kelly giddy, hopping to Carmen afterwards to slide right arm round her back and coax her out...Electra blinking away tears, blubbering quietly as she's displayed to a boisterous beach crowd.

CARMEN ELECTRA RETIRES! "It's time," a weepy Carmen tells a stunned press conference in days to follow. "My heart's still proud, and I know I'm still hotter than the girl in the other corner, but I just can't pull the trigger any more. A girl like Kelly Carlson wouldn't have stood a chance against me a few years ago: I can't continue to lose to these second rate bimbos." Carlson said to be "over the moon" at Electra's retirement; Kelly thrilled to be a legend killer.