Posted by simguy on 1/15/2005

Before: Megan being put in tough right off the bat: debut against wily coug Hatcher no joke and meant to establish Fox' bona fides right away. "I'm not just some Kaley Cuoco wannabe," Fox sneers in prefight." In fact - I'm bigger than just Kaley now, and I'm in a better position. Think about it - I'm gonna be getting all the Lohan and Spears I want and poor Kaley has to watch from the sidelines. She's going to shrivel on the vine while Megan Fox runs wild!" Sheer glee as Megan pictures her own bright future at the expense of the more celebrated Cuoco. "Teri needs to take a page from Shannen Doherty's book," notes one Celebrity Ring pundit commenting on this fight. "Shannen's boxing more, fighting smarter the older she gets - Teri has a tendency to wade in and slug with young vixens like Fox. Hatcher remembers her tools, she'll sort this kid out - she lets pride get in the way and Megan could be a stiff test." Teri in black lace push up, black with white polka dots bikini bottoms - Fox in 2 and a half Men bikini (Samdog reference).

During R1: Shutout Hatcher. Teri doing it from outside - snappy jab off the hip, loping, rangy footwork carrying around Megan's left flank. Fox dukes up, crouching, weaving the stick with good head movement, but Teri's cleaning up hooks on young ribcage, grazing chin with the still lethal right. Hatcher looking things over, getting her range in a workmanlike first.

R2: Megan gets her jab going - nice stiff shot, non-anticipatory shot off the shoulder - Teri's facing into it, reacting late. Midway through, Hatcher blocking at the ropes - Fox pecks at her jabs upstairs, then slants down into aging cougar midriff with a smashing right hand! Hatcher shouts in pain, sits in the ropes - she's helpless as Fox stands up pretty and tags the chin clip/clop left-right uppercuts. Down the stretch, Teri's legs shot - Fox works Hatcher over with muscular body work - just bumping and slugging to the hips, in behind the elbows, and taking more than her fair of jug in close quarters. Good scrubbing shutout puts a happy smile on ingenue's face: Hatcher achy, rattled, embarrassed through 2.

R3: Teri answers, and answers, with vigour. Spiteful jabs penetrate the defence, tarting up Megan's cheekbones, dappling her upperchest. Hatcher bending in with sinewy right hands, carrying low on follow through, easing onto her back foot to pull the rock-away hook across Fox's pate. Megan gloves at lips, moving her head well, but getting tracked - she's getting kissed right hands at an alarming rate. Down the stretch - adds up: Teri stepping right, suddenly striding in with a sweeping right on the jaw and MEGAN GOES WOBBLY BUTT! Fox doing well to soak up the shot, reels on boneless legs to the ropes - ON COMES TERI! Welcome-to-the-FCBA shellacking meted out: Teri heartless as she licks welting hooks to ribs and tum, drives in crashing right hands as destitute Fox covers up hurting. Bell: CHEAP RIGHT HAND TERI! Hatcher snarling as she smites a clocking late shot to the chin of her foe, draping Fox woozy against the ropes and prompting a panicky ref to body Teri back.

R4: Teri hardhearted, eyes cold as she hunts Megan down and takes her apart. Hooks - long, cranking, lanky - spanking loud against gut, stooping Fox forward. Hatcher clawing her hook across pert ingenue jugs, reaping them without mercy - Fox pouting in pain, standing there for the hurt. Creasing right hands slam past Fox's guard, smashing her face to the side, buckling her knees - young beauty showing plenty of moxie in soaking up these shots and refusing to go down. Steady, discouraging retreat for Fox - she's beaten raw, pillar to post - Teri walking her down, licking and lathering at her bell to bell.

R5: Fox busting up, but determined - she wades into Teri guns blazing. Hatcher flat-footed, gets caught a clanging right on her chin which sets her on her heels. Hatcher slapping back, but she's off balance - Fox wading through, puts another right on the chin, steps and gets the hook - Hatcher driven ropeside in shock. Fox wading in with a snarl - swinging lefts and rights with shattering force - gloves bouncing and spanking off Teri's ribs, head and shoulders. Hatcher windblown, stunned - face in her gloves - BUT SHE CAN'T TAKE THOSE BODY SHOTS! Fox getting into Teri with some gutshocking right hands behind the elbow, POUNDING ribcage with hollow thudding impacts - Teri reaches to clinch and FOX TAKES JUG! Megan showing veteran awareness - shrugging short left uppercuts to bulging rack off her front foot, brushing Teri back with a groan. Right hand smashes Teri's face to the side, sets her head lolling weakly - left hand smashes cheek - Teri's hands drooping, Teri staring and THE REF STEPS IN! TKO5 in savage fashion, Megan Fox.

After: Little known TV vixen stuns the FCBA country club - Hatcher pounded out in sensational fashion, simply rendered helpless by Megan's crashing fists. Important bout for Fox's credibility - she's anxious to erase the impression of her as an ABC cafeteria rival to Cuoco: stopping Hatcher a step in the right direction. HBO techs jittery as Fox eyes a helpless, dejected Hatcher - no telling what a hotblooded young Samdog fighter will do when tempted by battered weakness. Swan Lake? Better believe it.