Originally posted by Simguy on 1/22/2005,  8:47 am.

Before: At first blush, Keibler’s an odd opponent for mega celeb Jennifer. “I’m a student of the game,” Jennifer shrugs by way of explanation. “You may not know Robia LaMorte had a fight in New Orleans last week—but I just got a tape of it: I like to know what’s going on out there. Stacy intrigues me. I mean, a lot of polls I’ve read give her a healthy shot against me, even with that pork-barrel record of hers. I want to see what she’s all about, how she’s getting away with what she’s doing. She’s really tall, really fit—I’ve never in with anybody quite like her. It’s exciting anytime you get a young fighter like Keibler who doesn’t KNOW to bow down, doesn’t know her own limitations—she could be capable of anything.”

Celebrity Ring pundit sums up Keibler’s chances: “The key for Stace is discipline. She comes in wings flapping like she’s done with a lot of the second tier type girls, Garner will absolutely flay her. Stacy’s got to use every inch of that 5’11 frame, make Garner pay for real estate, make her gamble a bit. I want to see what happens when Keibler leans into Jen’s chin, and to get there, Stacy’s going to have to be smarter than she’s shown.”

Keibs in tan western motif JLo bikini—Garner in neon baby blue “Alias” bikini, bra style top.

During R1: Keibs hopping forward, slinging right hands, back with sweeping lefts, giving up her height by charging forward.. Jen patient—head down, dukes up, elbows in, right foot well back and balanced on big toe. Garner managing the pressure with subtle bobs of her head, answering back crisp to Stacy’s sleek, tanned ribs—crunching shots soon have Stacy trudging forward, maniacal output dropping. By the midway point—Keibler’s face in gloves, elbows in as she steps forward—Garner shuffling back and to the side, walking Stacy in and peppering her. Jennifer putting brisk patterns together—firm jabs into Stacy’s guard, right hand into the guard—RIPPING hook in behind the elbow, clubbing sidearm right chopping into ribs on the left flank, Keibs bogging down in pain, ships it like a warrior, but she’s rung up a shutout in the first.

R2: Garner systematically going after Keibler’s ribs—rumors of a garner pow-wow with Torrie Wilson in camp seem to be true as Jen follows the typical Wilson blueprint to a T. Stacy covering up, face in her hands, elbows in—Jennifer’s jabbing her to fix position, then going hips and ribs with shattering right/lefts in spanking combination, stepping to the side and staying on her girl. Garner economical, keeping the left foot in a bucket, pivoting around to fresh angles, hard fists on toned ribs throughout. Stacy stepping out occasionally with a pained expression—taking deep breaths—but she starts to adjust. Keibs issuing a stiff jab late, rotating clockwise—Jen tries to come forward and eats an intercepting right hand on the button. GARNER GOES WOBBLY BUTT! Jennifer staggered midring—Keibler drops her left to her thigh and swings a tight right clout to the jaw, stroking it, stroking it again, belting Jen in a wounded little stumble to her right. Bell: Keibler scowling, intense—Garner already shaking it off but realizing the danger now.

R3: Jennifer revs up, goes to another gear. Fearsome jabs stab belly and face, keeping Keibler covered up. Riveting right hands rifle in straight from the shoulder—usually blocked up top, but freezing Keibler long enough for snatch-spank left/rights on waist. hips, and ribs. Jen pivoting as Keibler stumbles forward, turning long blonde, analytically going at her torso with crisp, heartless leather, Crowd groaning from the hollow thump-sharp crack of Jennifer’s fists on Stacy’s ribs—Keibler burying face in hands and biting down on screams of pain as Jen hammers away. Bell to bell, withering beat down—Garner just patiently chopping away: tears in Keibler’s eyes as she shambles to her stool, body all lit up and throbbing.

R4: Keibs shows heart, will, even some savvy this round. Stacy badly hurt last round refuses the invite to come forward: she’s sliding back and to her right, stopping to pop long, hard jabs at Jennifer’s guard. Keibs showing leggy grace—loping step, sinewy hook on the jaw, pivot away. Flinch feints setting up lead right hands straight down the pike. Garner blocking or slipping most of it, but unable to whittle down the ring—she’s touched and scuffed for points this round.

R5: Garner mounts a series of attacks against the ropes, just to see what Stacy has left. Jennifer belly-jabbing Stacey to move her to perimeter, then snapping off combinations—tidy rights and lefts up and down the flanks, against the shoulder, first jerking uppercuts off the fight trying to penetrate Stacy’s elbows-in guard. Keibs frowning, under pressure, but fighting back in spots—she’s not real comfy slugging off the ropes, but she’s getting bandy-armed uppercuts, slinging right/lefts up around the ears—enough to keep Jen honest/

R6: Garner exploding Stacy up the gut—jab/right hands to the belly and chest, trying to draw the guard forward and expose those banged up flanks. Stacy doing a better job keeping her back off the ropes, lope-stepping around Jennifer, leaning into right hands, lashing come-back hooks. Spirited stuff midring—both women scoring, but down the stretch it’s Stacy. Keibs with an unorthodox bolo right to the pit of Garner’s untouched stomach freezes brunette behind her gloves: Keibler drops her left to her thigh to pick Jen up pretty the right uppercut, then dips left to haul a clouting right to ear, gets it again and JENNIFER’S STUNNED! Garner’s legs a-quiver, stooped forward behind her guard—she’s paralyzed as Keibs goes to town! Stacy snarling, unleashing swinging rights and lefts, gloves pelting and skidding off Garner’s head and shoulders as brunette bobs and weaves on the spot.

R7: Wake up cal for Jen Garner—she’s taking no more chances. Crippling body work in the first minute off that positioning jab—rights and lefts tight to Keibler’s ribcage behind the elbows. Jen bringing her hands back sharp, reloading for more. Middle minute sees Garner go into overdrive—ripping 3 and 4 punch combinations, riddling Keibler’s torso with a straight criss-cross, hooking blows, chopping rights, By the third minute—Keibler sobbing into her mitts, stooping forward in anguish,  legs shot—Garner piling on, taking anything she wants. Jen getting w and 3 digging hooks in succession, twisting and getting thick right hands just inside Stacy’s left hip—scooping out the pelvis. Fishhook tight left uppercuts picking up Keibler’s chin as guard breaks down—it’s a massacre. Tremendous sustained barrage of shattering rights and lefts to the ribs breaks Keibler down at last—spilling her to all fours and leaving her a ramshackle ruin of the lanky vixen who started the fight. Sobbing, hugging a battered torso, Keibler sits back on her haunches, shakes her head pathetically “NO” at the ref to indicate surrender. KO7 Jen Garner in bloodcurdling fashion.

After: Keibler taken apart—vindication fir a Jen Garner some were speculating had been exposed by Charlize Theron. “Stacy’s got potential,” Jen says in postfight, toweling off. “I thought I had her in the third and she recovered nicely—I thought I was breaking her down in the fifth and she caught me in the sixth—she’s more resilient than I expected. I knew from talking to Torrie that Keibler can’t take it to the body, and I also knew from tapes that Stacy doesn’t punch with a girl—she either goes first or waits her turn. I knew if I could sit down on her rib cage I’d get her out of there and that’s what happened.”

Reposted by Archer 5/20/09.