UNIFIED LIGHTWEIGHT TITLE

Posted by Simguy on 8/25/2007, 9:55 am.

Before: Garner aging gracefully, champ loses a step here, picks up a technique there, adds a little size and continues to dominate the lightweight division. “Jessica’s body is a superb fighting machine,” Garner admits in prefight. “it’s that goosedown head of hers which lets her down. She’s so used to blowing girls out that she gets discouraged if you can extend the fight. That’s the plan: hang back and frustrate her early, wear down the body, then take her apart down the stretch. I’ve basically kept this girl un check her whole career: I don’t think that’s gonna change any time soon.” Biel champing at the bit—TU star has mulched her competition during the current stretch—but can she put it all together in a title tilt? “All I heard while Jen was talking was ‘blah, blah, Jessica, blah, blah, Biel,” Jess says at the podium, “She loves to make plans and watch video, but you know what? All that crap means nothing once I hit you. What’s her big plan for getting off the canvas when I lay her down? What’s her big plan for dealing with the cut and busted eye I’m gonna give her, hey? It’s over for Jennifer Garner—I’m sick of people calling her my ‘limit’. There are no limits on what this” pulls up tank top with left hand to reveal crunching abs while popping the right bicep, “can accomplish in a boxing ring.” Jennifer G in red bikini, red gloves, hair tied back off her brow in Celtic braids, Jessica in tangly blonde shoulder length locks—electric baby blue bikini from “Stealth”; white gloves.

During R1: Jessica right chest-high, left at hip, torso slightly tilted forward as she balances on balls of feet, ready to pounce or bop back out of range midring. Garner thoughtful—chin tucked, hands up—waiting on Jessi’s pounce in order to intercept with the jab. Biel testing JG feints, circling clockwise, closing up stance to slip Garner’s work with a sexy little left shoulder-roll. Midway through, Biel times it sweet—rolling the Garner one-two, then answering back a whipping right to mouth; Garner busted flush, chin jammed in and down—she scoots to her backside as crowd roars to its feet. Biel jogging all smiles to neutral corner, looking bubbly: Garner peeling herself off the canvas, shaking her head in wonder at the shock. Creaky 8, JG—Biel prowling in, crouching as Garner covers up earmuff, Jess pouring in a right cross off the left foot, then easing to her right (back) foot. To pull the wiping hook across—gloves bounce hard off dome of Jen’s head: Garner spills to her right along ropes, knees loosened. Jen hits HISC corner—come forward with a sweeping hook (ducked by Jess) and a right uppercut (weaved by Jess down low). Garner hooking—gets beat to the punch as Jess twists up and out of her crouch: shattering hook takes Jennifer onna jaw, swiveling her head and DROPPING HER TO ALL FOURS! Biel crowing, lifting her mitts and looming over fallen champ--ref delays his count to push her away. Jennifer fighting off the darkness, reels to the ropes: eyes glazed, lips parted, blood trickling from right nostril. Woozy 8: ON COMES BIEL! Jessica grinning/snarling as she wades in bouncy—feet wide set—vicious, slinging action from her hips as she twists into Zab Judah style slashing lefts and right. Garner ducking down into it—gloves bashing off skull and shoulders—she slides hurt to her left along the ropes, stumbling for balance. Biel prowling forward—leaning into lefts off the right foot, rights off her left foot as she paints Jen her best leather at the bell. Garner a reeling, stumbling wreck to her corner: not many lightweight have survived a Jess Biel first round like this one.

R2: Biel jumping up, anxious to get after Garner: Jennifer all busted up, shabby as she gingerly circles to her right at the perimeter, Biel stalking—supple at the waist, hands low: she’ll step heavy onto her left foot to plant, leaning into the sweeping overhand right, then step onto the right foot to hoist the thick left hook.uppercut. Garner bobbing slightly, leaning back from this stuff—but even grazing blows seems to have her wobbly butt. Midway through—Jen pulling away catches a sweeping right flush on the face: Garner drops to her back with such a heavy crash—legs flopping outstretched and numb—that Biel jumps into the corner ropes, pounding her chest to celebrate the KO.

Garner beats the count.

Agonizing to watch the champ fight off the KO—she spaghetti-legs it into ropes, hands limps at chest—plum colored mouse massing under left eye: she stands there in tatters, grimly defiant. Biel startled when ref pulls at her to resume the fight: Jess glaring as she steps to the task remaining.

Garner sleepily bends forward behind her mitts—directly into the path of a crushing Biel right uppercut. Jen’s heads bounce—she sits on the ropes loose n’ woozy: Biel pops hips-right, pulling a vicious sidearm hook whippy through Jens jaw, swiveling champ’s head. Biel crosses her arms, pushing poor blinking Jen upright at the chest—then smokes her another left; another supple right uppercut. Garner’s strong, pale legs holding her up, but she’s being massacred, unable top stop Biel from getting off. Ref steps in as Biel’s just planning and unleashing hellish leather here: Garner swoons into the man’s arms, TKO2.

After: Biel leaping into TU corner, bawling emotional tears: she proves the most explosive force in boxing tonight with yet another irresistible surge out of the gate, sweeping Jennifer Garner out of the championship. Garner a shambles on her stool, head bowed, white towel over head, she knew this blitz was coming, just couldn’t pick it up tonight. “They may as well out these belts in a museum or something,” Biel crows in postfight, positively beaming from ear to ear, “because they’re mine now, and that’s the way it’s gonna be from now on. Jennifer was the last thing in my way—the last obstacle on my route to total domination. Forget going the distance with me—that’s not an option anymore—for anyone. When you sign to fight Jessica Biel, you’re basically signing on to get hurt and stopped. I’m gonna get with my management, and we’re gonna draw up a list of beauties to be broken—and we’re gonna march’em into that ring one by one for annihilation until I hear this division scream UNCLE!” Jennifer G incredibly classy, offers postfight commentary despite deep disappointment, “I got hurt,” Garner shrugs, left eye now swollen shut. “I got hurt, and that’s the one thing you can’t afford against Jessica. Biel’s the best finisher in boxing—she loves hurt prey; she caught me, then stayed on me like a champ. Nothing I could do. I still believe I had a great plan going in, and I know I can execute it on this girl, but tonight, Jessica Biel was the best fighter in boxing and I couldn’t contain her.”

Reposted by Archer 10/26/09.