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31 October 2012 Bianca Kajlich vs Leelee Sobieski

Page history last edited by Archer844 11 years, 2 months ago

Bianca Kajlich 01.jpg Leelee Sobieski 02.jpg

"WITCHES, PUMPKINHEADS & BLACK CATS AT THE ASYLUM"

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on October 31, 2012, 9:23 pm

BEFORE:

O'Dell: "Lots of stars here tonight. There's The Academy's box. Ginny is dressed as...ok, I'm not sure WHAT she's dressed as. Other Academy stars also in attendance including the girl who might be their next superstar, the lovely Jennifer Lawrence dressed as the hottest looking flight attendant you'll ever see..."

McCarthy: "See? Lawrence IS here!"

O'Dell: "I meant 'here' as in 'at the announce table', Mac..."

"So many nights I sit by my window,
Waiting for someone to sing me his song.
So many dreams I kept deep inside me,
Alone in the dark, but now,
You've come along...

You light up my life..."

McCarthy: "Truck, I need earplugs down here RIGHT NOW. My fingers are still letting some of this IN..."

Tess: "Now, Mac, is it nice to make fun of Debby Boone, a winner of the Grammy for Best New Artist..."

McCarthy: "Her, Milli Vanilli, The Starland Vocal Band, they'll give that thing to ANYbody..."

Tess: "This song, 'You Light Up My Life', set spent ten weeks at number one, the record at the time, back in 1977. Her father, Pat Boone, holds the Billboard record for spending 220 straight weeks on the charts with one or more songs..."

McCarthy: "Wait...her FATHER was Pat BOONE? Wasn't he the guy who fought at the Alamo??? He wore the coonskin cap..."

Tess: "You're thinking of...nevermind..."

O'Dell: "The Alamo and coonskin cap was Davy Crockett...Fess Parker played him on TV..."

McCarthy: "No, DON JOHNSON played Davy Crockett! I used to LOVE him and Phillip Michael Hall on that show!"

Tess: "If you're keeping score at home, Mac just mixed up Pat Boone, Daniel Boone and Davy Crockett, followed up by mixing up Davy Crockett and Sonny Crockett, then finished the trifecta with the classic Phillip Michael Thomas/Anthony Michael Hall Gambit..."

O'Dell: "I'm not sure there's even a J-Mac Bingo square for this one..."

McCarthy: "If you'll stop BABBLING, Walmart, you'll notice a masked brunette coming to the ring dressed as a Spartan Queen!"

Tess: "How do you know what a Spartan Queen looks like?"

McCarthy: "I SAW '300'!"

Tess: "I figured it was because you spent some TIME in Ancient Greece..."

McCarthy: "WALmarrrrtttt..."

Tess: "Centerfold in Platoboy..."

McCarthy: "Hope you like that jack-o-lantern, because you're going to need it for a HEAD..."

O'Dell: "Now, calm down, Mac. Into the ring goes our Queen, helped off with the costume and mask, and that's the lovely Bianca Kajlich!"

McCarthy: "Kajlich has quite the reputation as a power puncher in her fights at lower levels. She's going to be dangerous..."

Tess: "Bianca no doubt fighting at WELTER with THOSE curves, set off beautifully by that white bikini. And that means only one of three girls can be coming down for Front Street..."

"Hey lady, you lady, cursing at your life,
You're a discontented mother and a regimented wife.
I've no doubt you dream about the things you'll never do.
But I wish someone had talked to me like I wanna talk to you...

Oh, I've been to Georgia and California and anywhere I could run..."

McCarthy: "I'm going to RUN. SCREAMING out of this ARENA if someone doesn't shut that OFF!"

Tess: "Interesting note about this song, which is, of course, the smash hit, "I've Never Been To Me", by Charlene Marilynn D'Angelo, known professionally as 'Charlene', is that it was a flop when originally released in 1977..."

McCarthy: "I can hear WHY! And FYI, Charlene, I've sipped champagne on a yatch, and it was GREAT!"

Tess: "The song initially reached only number 97 on the charts. In 1982, a Tampa disc jockey started playing the song at the request of a girlfriend. By then, Charlene had lost her recording contract and moved to the U.K. where she was working in a shop. The airplay in Tampa started a chain reaction, something we'd call 'going viral' today. The song was re-released in 1982, with the original spoken bridge, left out of the 1977 version, restored. The result was a number one hit in the U.K. The song also reached number 3 in the United States. Charlene never had another hit, but lives in California and still records today under the name Charlene Oliver."

McCarthy: "She. Must. Be. STOPPED!"

O'Dell: "Now, calm down, Mac, and turn your attention to the tall, masked woman dressed as Cleopatra coming down the aisle..."

McCarthy: "I'd recognize that ARROGANT walk ANYwhere! That has to be...DID SHE JUST..."

Tess: "First time being flipped off by an Egyptian Queen, Mac?"

McCarthy: "YOU...I KNOW IT'S YOU, YOU..."

O'Dell: "Calm DOWN, Mac...into the ring gets Cleo. Helped off with the costume and mask and in the black bikini, it is 'The Polish Princess', Leelee Sobieski!"

McCarthy: "I KNEW it was you, Sobieski! Don't you EYE me! I'll come UP there!"

O'Dell: "'Biodome 2', Mac. It's a MUSICAL..."

McCarthy: "Haven't these people suffered enough???"

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Time to get some picks. Tess?"

Tess: "Well, I hope Kajlich knows the 'Rules of Engagement', because Leelee certainly does. Sobieski is taller, younger, and much more experienced. Sobieski by KO."

O'Dell: "Mac?"

McCarthy: "Sobieski is a typical overrated Front Street big girl. All flash and no cash. Kajlich may be making her FCBA debut, but, as I said, she's got a reputation as a hard hitter. And I think she'll use that power to take out Leelee."

O'Dell: "Our ladies disagree again. Let's see who's right...Bianca immediately to the offensive, going right after the blonde, pressuring, backing her up."

McCarthy: "Sobieski afraid to stand in there with Kajlich's power. This is why she'll never be a top welter..."

Tess: "She's ranked fourth in the world, Mac..."

McCarthy: "And YOU'RE the one who says it's a two fighter division!"

Tess: "Touche`."

O'Dell: "Sobieski continuing to retreat. Kajlich landing some good shots. Leelee responds by disengaging. Sets up shop again, let's Bianca come forward, lands a couple of jabs, and when Kajlich finds the range, gets out of dodge."

McCarthy: "All these tactical retreats are keeping Leelee upright, but they aren't going to win her the round."

O'Dell: "Going to agree with you there, Mac, as it's Bianca on the offensive to the bell! Good start for Kajlich."

Tess: "Never hurts to go up 10-9."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Second round underway and Kajlich back to work, pressuring Leelee, going to work with the heavy leather. Sobieski banging right back now, not giving ground, hammering away with her own right hand."

McCarthy: "Leelee doesn't want to stand in front of this girl. Not with Bianca's power..."

O'Dell: "Leelee may not have as much power as Kajlich, but she DOES have power, and she's giving as good as she gets right now as the two ladies slug it out...AND KAJLICH ROCKS SOBIESKI WITH A RIGHT HAND!"

McCarthy: "TOLD you..."

O'Dell: "Bianca going to work now, hammering away at Leelee, driving her back into the ropes. Kajlich not head hunting. Banging body as well. Sobieski covering up. Countering occasionally, not allowing a complete jailbreak, but Kajlich is the one doing the scoring. Bianca turning up the heat, all about the attack, scoring right to the bell! And she's taken her second straight round..."

McCarthy: "Kajlich's got Sobieski in trouble. If I were in her corner, I'd be telling her to go right after Leelee in the third. If she does, she'll finish her..."

Tess: "Says the woman with ZERO training wins...."

McCarthy: "SHUT IT, WALMART!"

O'Dell: "Drink up, boys."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Into the third now and Kajlich turning up the heat again, wading in, looking to land that big right hand again. Sobieski again giving battle, then retreating, as Bianca continues to come forward...AND LEELEE SENDS HER REELING BACKWARD! OH, WHAT A TWO-PUNCH BY SOBIESKI!"

Tess: "Set that right up with that big sledgehammer jab. Stopped Kajlich in her tracks with it and banged the right over top."

O'Dell: "Leelee not piling on here, instead going back to the jab, fitting rights off of it..."

McCarthy: "Boxing her now that she got some respect with that power shot."

Tess: "Leelee one of the more athletic welters. She moves the hands and feet very well, and she's doing that now..."

O'Dell: "Certainly is, Tess. Working everything off that heavy 'Front Street' jab, keeping Kajlich at bay with it..."

McCarthy: "Not sure Bianca's got the legs all the way back, and that's having an effect, too."

O'Dell: "Might be, Mac, but, either way, Leelee fighting her fight now, boxing from range for points. And there's the bell, ending the best round of the fight for Sobieski..."

Tess: "And cutting Kajlich's lead to 29-28."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "We're into the fourth now, and Leelee with a solid one-two again! That stopped Bianca in her tracks!"

Tess: "Same combination. Stopped her with the jab, then came over top with the right."

O'Dell: "Leelee lands ANOTHER solid right, backed Bianca up...and ANOTHER that backed Kajlich up again..."

Tess: "She's got the range now, Jenny. And she's got Bianca's attention. Kajlich getting a bit reluctant about pushing forward."

O'Dell: "And Leelee now back to boxing Bianca. Working the jab and fitting in rights at range..."

Tess: "This is what Sobieski likes to do. She's tall and rangy, and, as we said, more athletic than most welters. She likes to use her feet, hand speed, and reach to outbox her opponents, and that's just what she's doing to Bianca now."

McCarthy: "Kajlich doesn't want to be out there on the end of these punches."

O'Dell: "But that's just where Leelee is keeping her. Everything based around that big left jab. Kajlich unable to get much done as Leelee suppresses her to the bell."

Tess: "And we're all even through four, 38-38."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "Fighters ready to go for the fifth, and Kajlich getting off quickly and working inside again..."

McCarthy: "Her corner was in her ear about it between rounds. She can't stay outside and try to box with this girl."

O'Dell: "Leelee still working that left. Kajlich stepping around and under, closing, working body with those heavy hooks. Leelee cuffing her upside the head in response. The girls tie up and the referee breaks them. Leelee lands a couple of good shots as Kajlich works in. Bianca banging away heavy inside. Good back and forth stuff, Mac!"

McCarthy: "Neither girl willing to back down now. Bianca intent on pressuring and Leelee not giving ground. Lot of leather being exchanged."

O'Dell: "Leelee lands a double-tap on that jab. Kajlich a hook, and Leelee BANGS home a good right. Bianca going body again as Sobieski THUMPS a left hook off the side of her head. Good two-way exchanges here, but Leelee getting the better of things as the bell rings ending the fifth."

Tess: "Closest round of the fight, but it was Leelee's round, and she has her first lead, 48-47."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "The second half of the scheduled ten begins with a big exchange! Both girls landing some solid stuff there, Mac!"

McCarthy: "Bianca got the better of it, though."

O'Dell: "Kajlich continuing to pressure...LEFT/RIGHT SOBIESKI! THERE IT WAS AGAIN AND KAJLICH IS HURT!"

Tess: "Stopped her again with that left and BLASTED that right to the head!"

O'Dell: "And Sobieski not interested in boxing THIS time! She's going after Bianca, BANGING that jab home as Kajlich covers up. Bianca being backed up. Trying to circle to stay off the ropes. Legs working well enough for her to do that, but they're not exactly steady..."

Tess: "Leelee measuring her. Looking for the finisher..."

O'Dell: "LEFT HOOK LANDS FLUSH! BIANCA WOBBLED...RIGHT HAND AND DOWN SHE GOES!"

Tess: "Brutal! Kajlich crumpled on her right side at Leelee's feet!"

O'Dell: "Sobieski to a neutral corner. Bianca rolling to her belly as the referee's count reaches five. Kajlich pushing to her hands and knees and going to get up at eight! Referee gives her the mandatory and he's going to let it continue. And here comes Leelee! Sobieski letting both hands go! Bianca rocked back into the ropes, covering up, hanging on...VICIOUS UPPERCUT SPLITS THE GLOVES! KAJLICH WOBBLES ALONG THE ROPES...AND IT'S OVER! REFEREE HAS SEEN ENOUGH AND HE'S STOPPING IT! YOUR WINNER BY TKO6, 'THE POLISH PRINCESS' LEELEE SOBIESKI!"

Tess: "That was a very thorough, professional win for Leelee. Sometimes, with all the publicity Decker and Ruah get, I think the boxing press overlooks Sobieski, but they shouldn't, because she might be the best Front Street has."

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I've got our winner, Leelee Sobieski. Another impressive performance FROM and big win FOR you tonight..."

Leelee: "Thanks, Tess. This girl can fight. And she can HIT. She's better than a lot of welters in the FCBA. If she gets work, she's going to beat people. And, yeah, it's a big win. The welterweight division at Front Street is pretty competitive. It doesn't take much to fall off the pace. You need to take care of business when you get the chance to get in the ring. And that's what I'm about. Not hype or drama. Taking care of business."