Posted by Simguy on 12/4/2004, 9:36 am.

Before: Cuoco looking to enter the upper echelon at bantam with a thunderclap--gained credibility against Connelly, hoping to dazzle on Hu. “I’m pumped,” says Kaley, “I’m ready to step up and beat Kelly Hu, and I couldn’t have said that before going to war with Jen Connelly, I’m not just here to compete--I want to dominate all phases of the fight with Hu and really let people know I’ve arrived.” Hu nonplussed--not too amused at blonde ambition. “Kaley wants in with me, Eliza and Jennifer, by come on,” Kelly sneers, “she’s basically Britney spars’ lapdog. Jennifer barred the door to Kaley--I will too.”

Hu showing up tuff-girl: Daisy Dukes cut-offs, black bra style bikini top--Kaley sporty in white boy cut stretch shorts, white sports bra--white gloves for both.

During R1: Battle of positioning, girls feinting each other off, stepping into space. Both coming up short on seeking jabs--sparing offense as girls mount darting rushes hoping to land single potshots. Cuoco a little more serious about it--Hu content to play matador.

R2: Kelly times a Kaley--first with the check hook as Cuoco rushes in, then with a screened right hand as Kaley’s loading her own right. Cuoco tagged clean on the chin--wobbly butt--she steps out and comes under pressure as Hu turns aggressor. Kelly dressing Kaley up--tidy swatting lefts and rights up and down the flanks--real brisk-mitt stuff as Cuoco covers up, Hu stepping with Kaley--patient, cold blooded pursuit--Kelly just putting her hands on hurt Cuoco bell to bell.

R3,4: Fight settles in cautious, but athletic display--both girls working the ring magnificently, just not a lot of hot swapping as both still look for sudden potshot glamour. Low connect percentage rounds as girls show off cute shoulder-rolls, anticipatory footwork--Kaley takes the third, Hu the fourth in see-saw scoring.

R5: Cuoco stooping and reaching in the belly jab--Hu embarrassed by the touches, opens up a little, tries to chop an intercepting right onto Kaley’s ear, but blonde reads the play. Midway through it’s Kaley suddenly jumping in a screened lead right, nailing Hu on the chin as Kelly’s throwing--HU GIES DOWN! Kelly right back up, looking around chagrined, blushing--she goes immediately to her toes to prevent any kind of Cuoco follow up.

R6: Payback for Hu--girls supple in front of each other, trying to induce each other forward, Kelly feints and times Kaley for a sweet hesitation right out of the closed stance, sending Cuoco pony-trotting to her right in shock. Kaley momentarily wobbly butt--standing up straight, dukes at her temples--Kelly takes the opportunity to swat hard at the gut, big rangy right/lefts. Hu spritizing jabs down the stretch, dancing to her right, looking to shear off on the angle and get another potshot ting right before the bell.

R7: Hu continues to bedevil Kaley--feinting the younger woman, jabbing her tummy, slap-cuffing her face a hook while pivoting off to the side. Cuoco being bosses around a little bit, allowing herself to be maneuvered--Hu becoming a sorceress, starting to pull the strings on blonde. Midway through, Hu suddenly forward off Kaley’s left shoulder--Asian shoots a lead right to the ear, retracts and stabs it again to the mouth, spilling Cuoco stunned to the ropes. Kelly pouncing, tearing up Kaley’s tanned tummy a blistering flurry--Cuoco breaking down, drooping forward to clinch and Hu lights her up a GLORIOUS tidy right uppercut! Kaley splattered back and reeling--KELLY GOES TON JUG! Hu hardhearted, eyes flat with malice as she scrubs furiously across Cuoco’s youthful rack, buffeting every square inch at the bell. Kelly chesting up and forcing eye contact--Kaley choking back tears, roughed up in the seventh.

R8: Cuoco hurts Hu a stab-and-retract right in the first minute, hurts Hu again in the second minute with a feint/right hand/left hand on the chin. Hu rarely tagged in combination, staggering away all blinking and wobbly butt--Kaley walking her girl down for a little retribution. Hu hard to bully--she sets up on the ropes and draws Kaley into a series of messy altercations--blonde getting cuffed and swiped as she drives in hard to the Hu waist with both dukes. Pushing and shoving after the break--tempers flaring as neither girl really imposing herself through 8.

R9: Kaley the fresh-legged beauty goes back to sniping and potshot ting from outside, but makes it work as Hu goes very defensive. Kelly closing up her stance, ducking to slip Kaley’s right, but Cuoco’s hooks are finding Asian chest and face4--Kelly often awkwardly bailing out of her positions in retreat. Athletic shutout Cuoco--she’s touching Hu, not getting touched back.

R10: KALEY UNLEASHED! HU really tiring--Kaley steps up the pace and has Kelly reeling from a series of shooting lead rights and hop-in swipe-hooks, Kaley’s accuracy on a moving target frightening--Hu bouncing off ropes, staggering away to regroup but she just can’t shake the pursuit. Cuoco bounding after hurt prey, landing rights up top, digging up the gut downstairs, then chasing again as Kelly wilts away. Kaley’s legs dictating--she’s in and out beautifully, landing smashing blows and avoiding the receipts--Hu visibly demoralized even as she’s breaking down physically. Second minute--Kaley with a gorgeous lead right to the chin stuns Hu along the ropes--Cuoco able to suddenly snap off a brisk swiping barrage of lefts and rights across the mouth, swatting Kelly’s face side to side and HU SITS DOWN! Kelly’s legs just giving out and dropping her straight down--she flounders awkwardly before narrowly beating the count. After 8. Kaley hungrily pushing her way in--she’s supple at the torso, feinting at Hu’s belly, feinting at it again then looping a shattering right hand over the top and catching Kelly’s face guessing wrong! DOWN GOES HU! Kelly blasted out at the ropes, she’s gone before she topples stiffly sideways to lie stretched out on her face. Game, Set, Match--Kaley Cuoco KO10.

After: Nip and tuck graceful battle ends with blunt baseball-bat savagery as Cuoco takes the final three heats in relentless, single-minded fashion, hunting hu down all over the ring and not letting up until Kelly lies motionless in a heap. “I want Neve,” gushes an excited Cuoco in post fight. “There--I said it, I have no idea if my guys are even talking with her guys, but I’m ready right now to defeat Neve Campbell. I’ve got the size, the skills, the power--why wait? I want belts, and I want to take them off Neve Campbell’s waist--I can’t make it any plainer than that!”

Reposted by Archer 12/4/12.