O & E House Show

Posted by OddManOut on January 29, 2013, 5:14 pm

Before: Leighton Meester surging, Elisha Cuthbert in free-fall, and a belt around Emily Van Camp’s waist. Lookout fighters are expected to jockey for position, but to call the footing treacherous among the bantams is an understatement. Hard to believe Minka Kelly was fighting a Hall-of-Famer for a shot at the bantamweight title just in October. Since then, her FCBA record is three losses and a draw. Enormous pressure on Minka as twenty-something usurpers are attempting to solidify their position as the new alpha bantams.

Minka in a must-win situation means an opportunity for Kelly Carlson. Lower expectations means she only has to be competitive, force Minka to make the fight. Blonde girl putting together a better 2012 than her record shows, finding herself on both sides of a pair of 1 point decisions, then finishing the year in a good back and forth body paint matchup against an eager and hungry Olivia Wilde

Carlson in curly blonde tousle; white sport top; black sport bikini bottoms with white waistband; white gloves. Minka in yellow bikini top; royal blue cheerleader spanky bottoms over her blue bikini bottoms; white shoes/no socks; small white gloves; hair in ponytail with bangs bracketing face

R1: Stiff, sneaky check jab punching Minka on her mouth as she's setting up, preemptive little poke freezing Mink in place while Carlson steps out to reopen the range. Flurries to the gut; shoeshining rack, Carlson scrubbing away on Minka, then sidestepping her, outclassing brunette in spots. Minka beaten backwards to ropes in the final minute, digs in on the apron, showing determined earmuff as blonde girl squares away, trying to put her away early. Grim, tousle-rubbing/shoulder-bumping toe-to-toe, both girls keeping elbows in, dukes up to work in tight. Minka able to compete, but Carlson has better position and seems more aggressive.

R2: Carlson jabbing on approach, stubby left hands knocking Minka's pretty face back. Sets up thick right hands to breasts, opportunistic left hooks raking paunch. Minka coming grimly forward, getting her licks in, but paying a fearful price as Carlson has the geometry figured out quite to her liking, forcing Minka to eat two or three shots for every one she receives.

R3: Carlson chip-jabbing, then sidestepping left, stepping in and out, turning Minka, touching her the poke to set up thumping right/lefts to waist. Minka stooping forward behind her mitts as she takes body shots, then trying to hook for the receipt. Eventually, she starts landing thick to blonde body, forcing Carlson to settle down and retaliate with power. Latter half the round becomes a bitter tousle-grinding, shoulder-rubbing slugfest in the trenches. Minka able to brawl to a standstill late, keep out of a 3-Love “must KO” scenario


R4: Minka gets the jump on her blonde, leading to brutal toe-to-toe slugging midring. Girls scrubbing foreheads together, taking turns digging short to waists, cuffing behind elbows, coming up off the body to fit tidy uppercuts. Carlson forcing Minka back in the first minute, but Minka BURIES a left hook to the gut, cramping Carlson up before a followup stroke sends her to the canvas. Blonde girl beats the count, but that’s about all as Minka muscles her onto the ropes. Minka pouring it on, nothing comes back from Carlson and THE REF’S SEEN ENOUGH! TKO 4 Minka Kelly in a clutch come-from behind win!



After: “Rumors of the end of my career were obviously overblown,” a smiling Minka gushes afterward. Kelly able to keep her head and tunr back a spirited challenger, while keeping her head above water in the log flume-ride that is the Lookout locker room at present.