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22 March 2013 Eva Mendes vs Denise Richards

Page history last edited by Archer844 10 years, 9 months ago

Eva Mendes 04.jpg Denise Richards 04.jpg

Posted by simguy on March 22, 2013, 9:14 am

BEFORE: "She's trash," Eva says in prefight - dismissing DRich at a stroke. "Aging beach-slut - nothing more pathetic. Still - I need a win here: there's no excuse for letting Richards go rounds when she doesn't even belong in the same ring as me. I'm boxing royalty: she's the boxing equivalent of a scullery maid...I won't tolerate her in the ring one second longer than I have to!"

Richards best known recently for savage reality TV beach-brawls against the likes of Joanna Krupa...she's taking the FCBA spotlight in stride. "This is nothing special for me," Richards shrugs at podium. "I literally fight all the time - I can't even go grocery shopping without having to put some cow in her place...this is just another jealous witch needing to be witch-slapped, if you know what I mean. Mendes is shot - fighters know that, even if the media doesn't get it. She's shot; she's nowhere NEAR rugged enough to stand in against me...I'm just going to blow her (expletive deleted) doors off!"

DRich in bright neon baby blue bikini; white gloves; long blonde hair in tangle-curls. Eva in leopard print push up; snug black bottoms with a boy leg and a bit of a hip; black gloves; dark hair in gypsy tangles. During stare-down, upon being asked to touch 'em up - D takes a left-hand swipe at Eva's rack...Mendes leans back out of range and nearly answers back hot as ref moves in.

During R1: Eva with a new stance - left hip thrust forward; hands high/palms out...she'll poke the straight left/right from this posture; dip down to swing a lanky left hook to Richards' right hip, then recover with a chippy little left uppercut before resetting in-stance. Richards just dukes up, moving forward, looking to belt away righty wide to ribcage; slop a hook up top, then hopefully tangle-up with Eva to maul her in the clinch. Mendes controlling Richards' surge fairly well: Eva sliding her front (left) foot as she shifts and pivots, keeping a spicy jab on Denise, rarely letting Richards drag things down into the swamp.

R2: Denise more effective this round. Wide, swinging rights taking Eva heavily in the ribs; follow-on hook usually wrapping around Mendes' head as she dips forward, but that's fine by Denise...Richards tying up, bodying Mendes to ropes, mauling and brawling beach-style. Richards a master from the wrap - riding her left arm around Eva's right shoulder, slumping Latina forward for pumping right forearms to jug, or shoving rights to tummy. Mendes grunting in receipt, eyes frowning/lips parting in hurt...ref issuing a steady stream of breaks, but Richards doing a good job jumping back in to take the round sloppy.

R3: Mendes dropping in the stiff one-two, then dipping to crank her hook...Richards a split-second quicker hooks-chin before Mendes can deploy and EVA'S HURT! Eva swaying on the spot, eyes suddenly wide with shock...she reaches to tie up, but D just whirling rights and lefts lands clobbering blows to head, rejecting Eva's embrace, sending her staggering sideways to ropes! Eva damaged goods - right hand on top rope for balance; left hand extended to ward Richards off...DRich POURS in all jugs a-sloshing - sweeping a violent right to jaw; plowing a left to jug. Eva staring, slugged back into ropes...proud legs holding her up as she sits butt-on-cables, trying to affect a feeble earmuff. DENISE UNLEASHED! Richards face feral - lips pulled back off her teeth as she bends into walloping wide rights to ribcage, paralyzing poor Eva on the spot. Left hand stabilizing Mendes on her right shoulder, Richards reboots, starts crashing rights upside the head - just a brutal, hamfisted attempt to bludgeon through the defences. Eva swooning, not answering back...when it looks like she's wilting forward, Denise bodies-up to stack, then POURS dukes to rack! Eva's head lolling, hands falling to her hips, jugs jumping about under the brutal pump-action punches. STOP THE FIGHT REF! Richards won't let Eva fall - tragically beaten Latina gathered up into blonde arms and ragdoll-propped against ropes, whereupon more right hands beat the ribs; more right hands bash the skull, and BOTH hands pump into rack hup-hup-hup. THE REF JUMPS IN! Denise pulled away from behind - blonde curls in her eyes as she's lost in slugging fury...TKO3 in barbaric fashion, Denise Richards!

AFter: Bit of an upset as most books liked Eva's chances coming in...she's a girl on a bubble following this devastating dismissal. "When bytches step to me, they get their asses knocked out!" Denise seethes in postfight. "You guys made Eva the favourite - I didn't! Anybody asked me beforehand what was going to happen, I flat out told them I was going to stretch her the hell out! I don't let girls last with me: I finish girls. Eva's damn lucky this ain't the beach, because I'd STILL be beating on her right now!"