If you are citizen of an European Union member nation, you may not use this service unless you are at least 16 years old.
You already know Dokkio is an AI-powered assistant to organize & manage your digital files & messages. Very soon, Dokkio will support Outlook as well as One Drive. Check it out today!

30 June 2013 Amanda Seyfried vs Amy Adams

Page history last edited by Archer844 10 years, 6 months ago

Amanda Seyfried.jpg Amy Adams 02.jpg

"BAZZ AND BABES AT THE ASYLUM" PPV

(Site: The Asylum Arena. Philadelphia, Pennsylvania)

Posted by Results By Sim/Words By Wiz on June 30, 2013, 9:49 pm,

BEFORE:

"Here's the thing," says a smiling Amy. "Amanda is overrated both on the screen AND in the ring. I PROVE I'm a better actress than her every time I walk on set. And, tonight, I'll prove I'm a better FIGHTER, too."

"I love the fact that Adams is talking crap," says Amanda with a shake of the head. "So, I'll join in. I'm not just going to go out there and beat her, I'm going to beat her up, beat her down, and knock her out."

ROUND ONE:

O'Dell: "Back at ringside and that's 'Life's A Happy Song', and here comes Amy Adams..."

McCarthy: "You want to talk about a typical Asylum opponent for The Weirdo and the hookers. Adams has fought twice in the FCBA, both at Asylum, and she's lasted a TOTAL of three rounds. And one of the girls that beat her got sent to AAA!"

Tess: "Amy IS, however, a major movie star, in theaters now with 'Man of Steel'..."

McCarthy: "So is Johnny Depp, who has as many FCBA wins as Adams!"

O'Dell: "Amy into the ring, helped off with the robe to reveal a red number she fills out a lot better than Johnny Depp...and that's 'Mama Mia' booming through the arena, and here comes 'The Assassin', Amanda Seyfried!"

Tess: "Still working on convincing Wiz to switch this music..."

O'Dell: "Amanda into the ring, helped off with the robe by Jewel and Neve to reveal that yellow bikini she favors and fills out VERY well. As the ladies get ready, let's have some picks. Tess on record as favoring Amanda, what do you think, Mac?"

McCarthy: "Well, Seyfried's the typical overrated Dancing Hooker. She's been up and down, and if Spears hadn't flamed out, she'd probably be gone. But even SHE has to be a favorite over Adams."

O'Dell: "Well we're about ready to go and..."

So fill up your glasses with brandy and wine
Whatever it costs I will pay
Be easy and free when you're drinking with me
I'm a man you don't meet every day...

McCarthy: "Oh, HELL no!"

O'Dell: "That song is 'A Man You Don't Meet Every Day' and that can only mean The Grand Wizard is on his way to the ring!"

Tess: "I think we may have just discovered who our guest announcer is!"

McCarthy: "I repeat, OH. HELL. NO!"

O'Dell: "Wiz on his way to the broadcast table, carrying a sheet of paper, smiling and waiving to the crowd..."

McCarthy: "GET OUT OF HERE YOU LOWLIFE!"

O'Dell: "Wiz taking the empty chair next to Tess..."

McCarthy: "I'M WALKING OFF THIS BROADCAST RIGHT NOW! I WILL NOT WORK WITH HIM!"

Man In The Hat: "Now, calm DOWN, Mac..."

McCarthy: "DON'T YOU TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! GET OUT OF HERE OR I SWEAR I'LL KNOCK YOU INTO NEW JERSEY!"

Man In The Hat: "I'll be leaving in just a second. I'M not the special guest announcer..."

McCarthy: "Damn RIGHT you're not! And there ISN'T going to be a special guest announcer because I didn't approve one!"

Man In The Hat: "And you get approval of all prospective guest announcers in your contract..."

McCarthy: "DAMN RIGHT! NOW GET OUT OF HERE!"

Man In The Hat: "HOWever. All the announcers contracts are, of course, with HBO and are SUPERSEDED by HBO's contract with Front Street. Now, allow me to read from section XXIV, paragraph VI, subparagraph III, 'In the event that the BAZZ FIGHT CLUB should consent to appear on an Asylum card, BAZZ has the right to appoint a guest announcer. Said announcer will be appointed AT THE DISCRETION OF POINDEXTER DEL CRUNCHY..."

McCarthy: "THAT'S NOT IN THE CONTRACT!"

Man In The Hat: "Oh, but it IS. And, Mr. Del Crunchy HAS chosen to appoint a guest announcer for this evening's card. Now, I'd better get up to the owner's box. Have a good evening, Mac."

McCarthy: "THAT'S RIGHT! GET OUT OF HERE YOU..."

One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
Go ask Alice, when she's ten feet tall...

McCarthy: "NO WAY! ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

And if you go chasing rabbits
And you know you're going to fall
Tell 'em a hookah smoking caterpillar
Has given you the call
To call Alice, when she was just small

O'Dell: "And business IS about to pick up! The crowd on it's feet..."

McCarthy: "SIRI, CALL MY AGENT!!"

When the men on the chessboard get up
And tell you where to go
And you've just had some kind of mushroom
And your mind is moving low
Go ask Alice
I think she'll know

McCarthy: "DID HE...OH, HE HAD BETTER NOT HAVE HIT THE F-U BUTTON OR HE IS FIRED! WIPE THAT SMILE OFF YOUR FACE, WALMART!"

When logic and proportion have fallen sloppy dead
When the white knight's talking backwards
And the red queen's "Off with her head!"
Remember what the dormouse said
"Feed your head.
Feed your head."

O'Dell: "Cassie Scerbo having a seat next to Tess..."

McCarthy: "AND I'M LEAVING! I'M NOT WORKING WITH SCABBO!"

Cassie: "Fine with ME. I can handle the color..."

McCarthy: "NO WAY! I'M STAYING! I'M NOT ABANDONING MY FANS TO YOU!"

Cassie: "She's so EASY. In more ways than one..."

McCarthy: "YOU LITTLE..."

Cassie: "I'm not in the best of moods these days, Mac. Choose your next words CAREFULLY..."

O'Dell(quickly): "Looks like the fighters are about ready to go. Let's get a pick from Cassie..."

McCarthy: "We don't NEED..."

Cassie: "I agree with Tess. I favor Amanda in this fight."

McCarthy: "Agree with...I picked..."

O'Dell: "Bell! There's the bell for the first. Adams quickly to the left hand, but Amanda working past it, wants to get inside and work the body. Amy more than willing to oblige..."

Tess: "Amy's no tiny fly. She's got a solid physical presence for the division."

Cassie: "Sure does, Tess. You aren't going to break her down quickly going body."

O'Dell: "But, Amanda willing to invest the time and effort downstairs. Amy shoving her off, but Seyfried right back in tight, working with both hands to the ribs and lats. Adams wants a little space, but she's not getting it."

McCarthy: "Seyfried's a solidly-built fly herself. She's fought at bantam before."

O'Dell: "Definitely the sturdy type, willing to exchange in the proverbial phone booth, which is just what they're doing."

Cassie: "And Seyfried getting much the better of things. Not letting Adams use her jab or use any movement."

O'Dell: "Amanda crowding her rival right to the bell, and there it is. Excellent first round for Seyfried."

ROUND TWO:

O'Dell: "Second round begins with Adams again trying to pop the left to keep Amanda at bay, but, again, Seyfried working past the glove, slipping inside, working the body..."

McCarthy: "Adams going to have to punch for respect at some point, because she's not getting any. Amanda's right in her grill and has been the entire fight."

O'Dell: "Adams being forced backward. Seyfried banging the body, then slowly working up. In control. Pressuring. Not letting Amy breath..."

McCarthy: "LEFT HOOK, ADAMS!"

O'Dell: "Good left hand off a drop step by Amy and she wobbled Amanda with it! Adams now going to work, backing Seyfried up with flurries to the head. Amanda giving ground, covering up, firing back in spots."

McCarthy: "Adams putting punches together very well. , scoring in bunches."

O'Dell: "Amanda backed into the ropes, covering up, looking to counter, not getting many chances to do it. Amy in total control at the bell!"

Tess: "Stole the round with that late flurry, didn't she, Mac?"

McCarthy: "Absolutely, meaning we're all even at 19 after two."

ROUND THREE:

O'Dell: "Third round begins with a WILD exchange! Both women landed a couple of good shots!"

McCarthy: "Adams looking to exploit, but Amanda seems to have shaken off that big left hand."

O'Dell: "Adams swinging away, missing more than she's landing now. Seyfried firing right back, looking for something big herself. Both girls getting a bit sloppy, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Not sure who's advantage that plays to, but, they certainly are."

O'Dell: "Amanda's not going body anymore, and Amy's head hunting, too. Neither one batting for any average, but both landing the odd power shot."

Cassie: "Only takes one big one, and that's what they're looking for..."

Tess: "Reminds me of a former Cub, Dave Kingman. All or nothing."

McCarthy: "He was before my time..."

Cassie: "Even Bob 'Death To Flying Things' Ferguson wasn't before YOUR time..."

McCarthy: "Truck, who was...You, LITTLE..."

O'Dell: "Both ladies winging away down the stretch. Amanda landing a higher percentage now, managing the chaos a little better, and finishing with a SOLID left-right."

McCarthy: "Seyfried's round."

Tess: "And she's back to the lead 29-28."

ROUND FOUR:

O'Dell: "The fourth round now underway and Amanda back to the pressure, crowding Amy, working the body, very clever in close...LEFT HOOK AMY AGAIN!"

McCarthy: "That nice little drop step!"

O'Dell: "Seyfried wobbled and Adams going to work again. Getting busy with both hands upstairs!"

Tess: "Seyfried backing and covering, got the guard up high."

O'Dell: "And Amy not taking the bait and going body. Instead she's banging punches off that guard, splitting it with a right. Amanda again countering in spots, as Amy presses her advantage."

Tess: "Amanda has a good chin, but she's lost a couple of fights by not doing enough to keep the referee at bay when she was in trouble. Dunst and Browning come to mind."

O'Dell: "Handling it much better here. Finding spots for offense. Slowly stabilizing and now firing back. Backing Adams up with a good right hand. Amy responds with a solid left. Amanda to the body and Amy another flurry upstairs. Good back and forth as the final seconds tick off. That's the end of the fourth and Adams has evened it again!"

Cassie: "38-38 through four."

ROUND FIVE:

O'Dell: "The fifth begins and Seyfried again with the pressure, crowding Adams and going to work on the body."

McCarthy: "Give the kid credit for sticking to the plan, but Amy has caught her twice already..."

O'Dell: "Seyfried giving Adams no space, no air. In tight, hooking the body, working up, then right back down. Adams back footed, tries to shove Amanda off, but Seyfried not having any. Bodying up and working those ribs and lats."

Tess: "Seyfried matching footwork, keeping square to Adams. Amy trying slide and angle, but Amanda always matching, always square."

O'Dell: "Adams tying up now, but Seyfried punches free, hooks those ribs one more time for good measure at the bell. Shutout round, Amanda."

Cassie: "She's establishing control with this pressure. Keeping Amy on the defensive, off balance. Smothering her offense. It's got her up 48-47 at the half way point."

ROUND SIX:

O'Dell: "The sixth begins as the fifth ended, with Amanda all up in Amy's grill. Adams giving ground now, trying to circle, but Seyfried having none of it, cutting her off, squaring her up, and going to work on the body."

Tess: "Amanda showing some really slick stuff in tight. Rolling the head and shoulders. Moving the hands and feet, gloves out and back quickly, not giving Amy much to hit..."

O'Dell: "And not giving her much of a chance to hit it. Amanda turning that pressure and volume up, keeping Amy on defense."

Cassie: "I wonder where Amanda picked up all this slick stuff. You know, since Mac says none of Front Street's trainers know what they're doing..."

McCarthy: "They DON'T! If some of these girls had REAL trainers and a REAL manager, they'd BE something by now! I'd have made Anna Torv champ a YEAR ago! TWO years ago!"

Tess: "Well, maybe Seyfried's learned from watching video of YOU, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Now, THAT makes sense..."

Cassie: "Tess, here are your eyeballs. You rolled them so hard they came right out of your head."

McCarthy: "I'm going to knock something out of YOUR head, Scabbo!"

O'Dell(sighing): "Amy tying up again, forcing a break. Trying to get some space. Looking to circle, but, again, Amanda cuts the ring, squares up, goes to work body. Forces Adams backward with a nice combination upstairs, and there's the bell ending the sixth."

Tess: "Shutout, Seyfried."

Cassie: "And she's got a little breathing room. 58-56 through six."

ROUND SEVEN:

O'Dell: "We move into the seventh now, and Amanda is sticking to the plan. Staying right on Amy, working her body, crowding her."

McCarthy: "Really smothering Adams now. Amy barely getting off at all. Spending all her time covering up and tying up."

O'Dell: "Seyfried very busy, working upward, then right back to the body. Thumping leather home, piling up points...AND ROCKING ADAMS FOR THE FIRST TIME WITH A RIGHT HOOK!"

Tess: "Adams' knees did a shimmy!"

O'Dell: "And Seyfried right back to work. Quickly backing Amy into the ropes and now HAMMERING away with both hands. Concentrating upstairs now, but not forgetting about the body."

McCarthy: "Adams tying up again, holding Amanda's arms, trying to buy some time."

O'Dell: "Seyfried shoves free and gets back to work. Not hurried. Not going all in for a stoppage. Cleaning up smartly, though. Final seconds tick away and the seventh ends with Amy still on her feet, but it's another shutout for Amanda."

Cassie: "68-65. Mandy's built a nice little cushion with three to go."

ROUND EIGHT:

O'Dell: "Eight round begins with Amanda again making with the pressure. Adams now tying up the younger woman inside, hooking the body with the left while tying up around the head with the right arm. Amanda punching free only to be tied up again..."

Tess: "What's the point of these tactics, Mac?"

McCarthy: "Adams has been doing everything she can to get space, and Amanda's not letting her have any. Amy's thinking two things, here, I'll tie her up and force the ref to break us, and also not let her work while she's inside. Plus, she still may not have her legs all the way back from last round."

O'Dell: "Adams wrestling with the younger woman now. Amanda shoving Adams off and going to work on the body, but Amy quickly ties up again. Referee breaks, Adams lands a nice combination before Seyfried closes and goes back to work. Again, Adams tying up and Amanda trying to punch free..."

Cassie: "Nobody's going to nominate THIS for round of the year..."

O'Dell: "It's certainly not pretty, but Adams IS slowing down the Seyfried train. Amanda still getting work done, but Amy able to score as well."

McCarthy: "Most competitive round we've had so far..."

O'Dell: "And it ends with a spirited exchange and a stare down after the bell!"

Tess: "Amanda's round close."

McCarthy: "Agreed, Walmart..."

Cassie: "78-74 on our cards. Adams will need something big with two to go."

ROUND NINE:

O'Dell: "Ninth underway and the two ladies right at it, winging away in the middle of the ring!"

McCarthy: "Looks like that last round got both of them fired up!"

Cassie: "Amanda doesn't need to be throwing bombs, though. Get back to work. You've got the fight won..."

O'Dell: "Good right hand from Adams...Seyfried a left-right that got Amy's attention! Adams a left hook, SEYFRIED A SHORT RIGHT AND ADAMS WOBBLED! Amanda going all in now, looking to take the redhead out of here!"

Cassie: "Ok, NOW she can throw bombs!"

O'Dell: "Adams backed almost immediately into the ropes and it's Amanda all over her, hammering away upstairs. Amy in a high guard and Seyfried goes right back to Adams' body, banging hooks into those ribs and lighting up the midsection..."

McCarthy: "Hope Adams has a whirlpool, because she's going to need one..."

O'Dell: "Amanda slamming leather off Amy's guard, rocking her side to side, but Adams catching most of it on her gloves and arms. Seyfried still dogged, looking for the off switch, but Adams hanging on as the final seconds tick away. There's the bell and the ninth is in the books and Seyfried pushes up off Adams and another glare exchanged!"

McCarthy: "Didn't know Amanda had this IN her..."

Tess: "Apparently she has. And she also has an 88-83 lead with one to go."

ROUND TEN:

O'Dell: "Three minutes to go in our opener and Amanda Seyfried right back to work, sliding past Amy Adams' jab to crowd, pressure, work inside."

Tess: "Got to admit, with the exception of a couple of big punches from Adams, Seyfried's strategy has worked pretty well, Mac..."

McCarthy: "Definitely has. Again, no idea where she came up with it, since none of the trainers at Front Street know what they're doing..."

Cassie: "Maybe she got the idea from Theron. As you know, they worked together and Charlize gave Amanda some advice..."

McCarthy: "The only thing THERON knows about boxing is how to RUN FROM ME!"

Tess: "That and how to hold every FCBA record and be the greatest fighter of all time..."

O'Dell: "Seyfried continuing to work. Hammering away at Adams' body. Amy again tying up, looking to counter, in spots, but Amanda shoving free, smothering Adams, not letting her get off."

Tess: "You've got to be impressed with Amanda's work here. This isn't some big splash knockout. She's one minute from winning eight of ten rounds here. And two punches from having pitched a shut out. That's not easy to do..."

Cassie: "I can remember Neve Campbell doing it to Mac..."

McCarthy: "She did NOT...I'M WARNING YOU, SCABBO..."

O'Dell: "Final seconds ticking away and there's the bell! This one in the books and no hugs, Mac! Instead another staredown!"

McCarthy: "I'm starting to LIKE this Seyfried kid!"

O'Dell: "And I think the judges are going to like her work over the last 30 minutes. Cards being collected and the decision being announced, and it's no surprise. 98-92 for your winner by UD10, 'The Assassin', Amanda Seyfried!"

AFTER:

O'Dell: "Let's go up to the ring and Tess Valmore!"

Tess: "I have our winner, Amanda Seyfried. Amanda, that was impressive stuff tonight, eight rounds out of ten..."

Amanda: "Thanks, Tess. There was a lot of pressure on me after Dunst. I needed to get in there and show my management what I'm capable of, remind them that I'm the girl that took Kreuk overtime, that I can fight with anyone in this division."

Tess: "No love between you and Amy..."

Amanda(smiling): "She's spent the run up taking shots at my acting and my fighting ability. Well, after tonight, she's not going to have much to say about one of the two."