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31 August 2013 Post Asylum PPV Press Conference

Page history last edited by Archer844 10 years, 4 months ago

Posted by Boxing World Online on August 31, 2013, 11:28 pm\

The Man In The Hat sits, as usual, at the center of the dais. To his left are Nicole Scherzinger, Brooklyn Decker, Daniela Ruah, , Pink, Britney Spears, and Jewel. To his right sit Neve Campbell, Kat Dennings, Gemma Arterton, Mariska Hargitay, Avril Lavigne, and Jane Levy.

Man In The Hat: "All right, as usual, before we get to questions, there are some people I want to thank. Let's start with the independent fighters who agreed to join us tonight. As you know, one of the purposes of the Asylum cards is to get work for fighters who might not otherwise get chances in the FCBA. We're going to continue to feature those ladies, and we want to thank the ladies who were here this evening. Also, of course, a big thanks to Foxfire Atlantic and the lovely Kate Winslet for agreeing to return to Asylum. We like the roster of Foxfire Atlantic and hope to have them back soon. And, let's not forget Odds and Ends, a stable we love working with. Not only do we HOPE they'll return, we're making sure of it. We're working right now to get Odds and Ends back for more fights this fall. And, thank you to my old buddy Poindexter Del Crunchy, not only for sending the lovely Olivia Wilde to our event, but for allowing Cassandra Lynn to become a full member of the broadcast crew. And, last but not least, to the FCBA Commission for sanctioning these events, as, without them, none of this would be possible. Now, questions. Cable Boy, go!"

HBO Reporter: "Neve, how disappointing was losing this one?"

Neve: "It sucks. Jewel and I have gone at it a hundred times in a hundred ways. And the other 99, most of which I won, don't matter right now. She has bragging rights until we fight again. And that's GOING to happen."

HBO Reporter: "Wiz, you OK with a rematch?"

Man In The Hat(smiling): "Av, what do they call Neve around the gym?"

Avril(grinning): "'The Boss'."

Man In The Hat(smiling): "Now, Cable Boy, just go ahead and assume that she didn't get that nickname because she DOESN'T get what she wants..."

(Laughter)

HBO Reporter(smiling): "So, I take it the rumors you're planning to sign Denise Richards are false..."

(Laughter)

Man In The Hat(smiling): "Cable Boy II! Go!"

Showtime Reporter: "Speaking of disappointment, Nicole..."

Man In The Hat: "Look, Olivia Wilde is an elite bantam. She's in the title picture, and she belongs there. Nicky got caught. It happens. She's got nothing to be ashamed of..."

Showtime Reporter: "But, there was a lot of talk coming in about her coming close in big fights and not winning...there's been trade talk surrounding Nicole..."

Man In The Hat(shaking his head): "Nicole is a big part of things around here. A BIG part. She's a top-level fighter. She can beat any bantam in the FCBA. She's also MADE. She's not being traded, unless she ASKS for a trade. We plan to have her here at Front Street for a long time. BLONDE! Magazine! Can I guess who you want to ask about?"

BLONDE! Magazine Reporter: "How impressed WERE you with Brooklyn's work tonight?"

Man In The Hat: "Very. Just like I always am with Brookie. This here is a girl with a ton of potential and a load of tools. She's a force in two divisions, and I could book her against Joan Rivers and sell tickets. Let's just say we're very happy to have Brooke on our roster and we have big plans for her. Tess, dear, go ahead..."

Tess: "How big was Kat's win tonight?"

Man In The Hat(smiling): "Well, it's not going to vault her to the top of the rankings, but, some fights aren't ABOUT rankings. They're about SETTLING things. And sometimes you have to let your fighter go off the board and do that. This was important to Kat, so we did it. Because Kat is important to US. Smackeroo, it's late, I flew in from Columbus, I'm tired and hungry. Take us to dinner."

Reporter: "Gemma and Dani looked pretty good tonight..."

Man In The Hat(smiling): "DIDN'T they, though? I have quite a deep group of bigs around here. Anna. Brookie. Dani. Gemma. Leelee. Swanny. I like ALL of 'em and I believe all of 'em have championship talent. Add in Katy and Ke$ha, who have as many physical tools as any of the rest, and I like where we are. We've never won a title other than bantam, but maybe one of these ladies will change that some day. All right. Dinner! Tess! Smackey! Limo!"