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31 December 2013 Post Asylum PPV Press Conference

Page history last edited by Archer844 10 years ago

Posted by Boxing World Online on December 31, 2013, 11:08 am

The Man In The Hat sits, as usual, at the center of the dais. To his left are Allison Mack, Grace Park, Pink, Britney Spears, Mariska Hargitay, and Jewel. To his right sit Neve Campbell, Brooklyn Decker, Anna Torv, Ke$ha, Avril Lavigne, and Jane Levy.

Man In The Hat: "All right, as usual, before we get to questions, there are some people I want to thank. As always, the independent fighters who were kind enough to join us deserve some thanks. We wouldn't be able to put together the varied cards we like without them. And, of course, we want to thank Kear's Kats for allowing Rosie Huntington-Whiteley to join us. Also to Lookout! Atlantic for sending Alice Eve here to Philly. And, of course, to Odds and Ends for Bar Refaeli. Also, I want to thank Avril and Jane for putting together another excellent card, and, last but not least, the FCBA Commission for sanctioning these bouts and making Asylum possible. Now, I'll take questions. Cable Boy!"

HBO Reporter: "How disappointed are you in Allison?"

Man In The Hat: "Not at ALL. Allison is a big part of our bantamweight division, and one bad night isn't gonna change that. Knife's won a lot of fights for us. And she's gonna win a lot MORE. Count on it. Cable Boy II, go!"

Showtime Reporter: "Ke$ha and Brooke didn't waste any time tonight. You had to be impressed with the two of them..."

Man In The Hat: "Absolutely. Big K, now, she has physical gifts few women in the FCBA possess. It's just a matter of rounds for her. As for Brooke, she's a force in two divisions, as you know. And, tonight, you saw a little hint as to why. Look at this! Brunette Magazine is here!"

Brunette Magazine Reporter: "Grace looked great tonight in beating up a blonde. She's your top bantam. Is another title shot in her future?"

Man In The Hat: "She DID look great and she is ONE of our top bantams. As for title shots, she's in the Top 5. If she keeps winning, it could happen. Tess, dear, go ahead."

Tess: "I want to ask about Neve..."

Reporter In The Back: "THERE'S A SHOCK..."

Neve: "Listen, a**clown. I only fought two and a half minutes. I'll come back there and kick your a** myself!"

Man In The Hat(laughing): "I'd advise you to let the lovely Ms. Valmore ask her question..."

Tess: "Thank you. Coming in, everyone expected this to be a tough fight for Neve. Were you surprised how it turned out?"

Man In The Hat(smiling): "Nothing Ms. Campbell does in the ring surprises me. Especially when she's as focused as she was coming into this one. I got a chance to watch her work every day. And I had a feeling it was gonna be a long...or short...night for Ms. Staite. Smackeroo. Dinner awaits!"

Reporter: "Talk to me about Anna's fight..."

Man In The Hat: "I'm very pleased with Anna's work. She showed what a good boxer she is, and also showed how well she can deal with tactics designed to take that away from her. Anna's a complete fighter and a very good one. I hope for big things for her in 2014. Now, it's dinner time. Tess! Smackey! Limo!"