OddManOut/Lookout results on January 11, 2015, 1:58 pm,

After: New “Mistress of the Body Saddle” Adriana Lima joined by her entourage as they line up shoulder to shoulder then march resolutely across the ring. One look at the women lined up like gunfighters headed for the OK Corral and The Academy women at ringside hesitate – their body language one of resignation – but they do what they must and climb the steps to join Charlize in her corner, forming a protective semi-circle in front of her...all but Cat Bell who remains glum in her ringside seat, nursing her bruised ego and holding a cold pack on her left kidney.

Led by Lima, Carlson, Holt and James, Sarah Shahi, Kendra Wilkinson, Ashley Greene, Christina Ricci, Bar Refaeli and Emmanuele Vaugier are joined by Catherine Zeta Jones. ELEVEN members of the Odds & Ends posse confronting ELEVEN members of the Academy. As soon as the fight ended, Head Trainer Natalya Ragosina, knowing what was coming, grabbed Nurse Sunny McKay and took her to the Academy locker room. Ragosina, a former world heavyweight champion, refuses to “have anything to do” with these postfight shows and is forcing McKay - a self-described “trained medical professional” to go as well. Ragosina explaining, “If this gets out of hand, they're going to need you in one piece.” McKay, putting up a show of reluctance, nevertheless hot-foots it out of the line of fire.

That left Theron with ten “protectors” but only Jones, Stone, and Lawrence have any bulk. The others: Jamie Lee, Teri, Halle, Lindsay, Amanda, Anna and Elizabeth are all bantam or lighter. It's going to be fairly even if a fight should happen to break out...WHICH IT DOES!

Nobody knows who started it, but 5'2” Mickie James was right in the thick of it as she and Kendrick, also 5'2”, slammed together and went to the mat in a tangle of flailing arms, legs – and the tatters of Kendrick's designer dress. James, in pants, quickly got Kendrick down to her bra & panties. If this were a WWE 'bra & panties match' James could claim the win...but it's not! Kendrick fought on regardless of her dishabille, giving a good account of herself while adding to her catfight rep! Sadly for Anna, Mickie James was experienced at all kinds of fighting and Kendrick was not! Still, lesson learned.

Elsewhere, the pairings broke down more/less as expected – and quickly resolved themselves the same way... in most cases:

Amanda Seyfried and Kendra Wilkinson reprise their earlier fight, with the same result. Wilkinson breast smothering Seyfried as you'd expect someone with years of Playboy breast battling experience to do to a girl who acts a lot better than she fights! Once Mandy was noncom-pus, Wilkinson left her stretched out and went looking for new victims.

Claire Holt and Lindsay Lohan rolled around pulling hair and tearing at one another. Again, the Academy girl was at a huge disadvantage. Lohan had dressed (undressed?) for the red carpet while Holt was wearing a golf shirt/long pants combo to work Lima's corner. Lohan gave a good account of herself, not letting her lack of attire hinder her. (Early on Holt ripped Linds' low-cut, mid-thigh, wrap dress off with a single swipe). In fact, Lohan fought well in just panties (she rarely wore a bra under her dress, and didn't need one!) Holt had her hands full (literally) as she managed to force Lohan to submit to a reverse double breast claw after two minutes. Then Holt straddled Lohan's tummy, her hands full of blushing tender flesh to ensure Lindsay stayed quiet while Holt watched the others and cheered her girls on.

Kelly Carlson tackled Sharon Stone while Sharon still had one leg outside the ropes, nearly knocking her off the ring apron into Cat Bell's lap! Stone grimly hung onto the ropes, however, and pulled herself back into the ring where she attacked Carlson with fists flying. Stone, who a year ago claimed to be “undefeated in any ring since 2004” had her hands full; giving away almost 20 years to the smaller woman! Still, once Stone's initial attack was blunted by Carlson's stubborn defense, it wasn't long before Carlson was seated astride Sharon's squirming, bucking, chest in a schoolgirl pin that left her hands free to punish Stone in whatever manner she felt necessary to enforce her demand for compliance!



To Carlsons right, Sarah Shahi and Liz Olsen were putting on an entertaining scrap. Sarah had gotten the edge at first, but Olsen (doubtless thanks to some sibling “tutoring” in her youth) fought back and had Shahi from behind in a tight scissors, using both fists to pound the older woman's body.

Ashley Greene was having an easy time with Halle Berry. A couple of punches to the older woman's half century old belly had Halle on her knees gasping for breath. From there, a reverse naked choke did the rest and now, like Kendra Wilkinson, Ashley went prowling for new prey.

Christina Ricci had picked out Teri Hatcher before she reached the Academy corner. Chris had whispered “I've got Kendrick” as she jostled for position opposite the petite blond but Mickie James had pushed her aside. “She's mine. Find someone else,” the wrestler had snarled. Ricci changed her direction and headed for the second easiest pickings she could see, the slender 50 y/o Teri Hatcher. Ricci only made one mistake, but it was a big one. She pointed to Teri and raised her fists, telling, “I got you babe!” (possibly channeling her inner Char?) It was the wrong thing to say to Hatcher, who had been “a close friend” of Theron's since Charlize's breakout performance in “2 Days in the Valley” and Teri also had a well-earned reputation in the FCBA as a power puncher. Teri wasn't a particularly good fighter, but she COULD hit - as Ricci found to her chagrin when Teri dropped her with a single right hand! Stepping over Christina's star-fished body, Teri went to help Charlize who was struggling against Lima's attempt to saddle her.

Catherine Zeta Jones badly wanted to take advantage of Cat Bell who she could see sitting at ringside looking like she wanted nothing to do with any of the Odds & Enders. But being a practical woman, CZJ decided she'd make do with whomever was available. That turned out to be a handful....two-time welterweight champion, and Theron's “personal” trainer, Janet Jones! At 54 y/o Jones still had her looks (thanks to the FCBA coming along when she past her prime which limited her to a few fights) and her figure (thanks to working out every day with Theron, Bell and Lawrence at the Academy). CZJ was already warmed up from whipping Cat Bell, which worked to her advantage. She launched an all-out punching attack, driving Jones back to the ropes before doubling her over with left hooks to the body, then dropping her to her knees with a smashing overhand right. With no referee to stop her, CZJ kneed Jones in the face and when she dropped to all fours, she kneed her in the ribs twice, the second dumping her through the ropes on the ring apron. Jones managed to grab the middle rope to keep her from falling on the concrete floor but Catherine kicked her in the ribs her with her hi-heel shoe and that did the rest. Jones fell backward to the cement floor, hitting her head and knocking her cold!

Thank goodness Emmanuelle Vaugier and Jamie Lee Curtis were putting on a good show for the fans sitting at the opposite side of the ring. They were already upset that all the “fun” action was taking place in the Academy corner but now they got an 'up close' look at movie star Jamie Lee and from their reaction they apparently approved of what Emmanuele was showing them. Jamie Lee preferred catfighting or wrestling to boxing (one reason – the other was her age – that she only had three fights in her brief FCBA career) so when Emmanuelle squared off opposite her, Jamie tackled Vaugier and took her to the mat the same way she did to Tia Carrere in “True Lies”.

Unlike Ms Carrere in the film, Emmanuelle didn't have to stick to a script. She fought like the model she'd been. Emmanuelle was a fan of Tia's and she'd seen 'True Lies' a half dozen times or more, so she thought a reasonable course would be to do to Jamie Lee what Tia could have if she'd been allowed to. After two or three minutes of struggle, Emmanuelle had Jamie Lee down to a reasonable approximation of the bra-panties she'd worn in the bedroom scene with Schwarzenegger in the 1994 film. Then she put Jamie Lee face-on to the crowd, sat on her butt and pulled her arms back in a surfboard, to a standing ovation from the fans enjoying the sight of Ms. Curtis' legendary heaving, jiggling, “rack.”

By far, however, the best contest of the the postfight action was between young Oscar-winner Jennifer Lawrence and SI Swimsuit model Bar Refaeli. These two fought a week ago and Bar gave a good account of herself; everyone said so. But Refaeli had been simmering since she'd seen and heard Lawrence's postfight press conference. Bar felt, probably rightly, that J-Law had “disrespected” her by apologizing for taking so long before she KO'd her. Now, Refaeli wanted retribution – and she was succeeding! Like most models growing up in an industry where the older, established, women went to extremes to hold down the younger, prettier, up-and-coming talents, Bar Refaeli had been fighting since she was twelve. She'd painfully learned the catfighting “tricks of the trade” from older, more experienced, models. Now she was passing along some tips to cherub-cheeked Jennifer. More specifically, Bar started off by slapping the smirk off of Lawrence's face...and that was before she started to tear into her for real!

But Lawrence wasn't some waif model who couldn't defend herself. She'd not only had some training for her role of Katniss for the “Hungar Games” franchise, she'd also gotten work for her roles in the “X-man” films. More important was the hard training Miss Ginny and the professionals at The Academy had put her through for her FCBA fights. But she discovered - once Bar took the fight to the mat that her most useful experiences were those gained in the impromptu late night 'rasslin' sessions she and Charlize had shared with Cat Bell. The two older, more experienced women had showed J-Law things they didn't teach in school and she put her knowledge to good use rolling on the mat with Bar.

Time and again, Bar put her in holds that she was able to escape, or counter, thanks to those nights on the mat. After most of the other fights had resolved themselves, J-Law and BraRaf were still tussling belly-to-belly and chest-to-chest. Now, with Jennifer temporarily having the advantage, she was just about to use the breast-smother that Cat Bell had taught her when she was suddenly grabbed from behind and dragged off of Bar. Looking around, she realized it was Kendra Wilkinson and Ashley Greene who'd been standing by waiting to see if Bar needed help. Once it looked like she did, they both jumped in!

Bar, Ashley and Kendra easily overpowered Jen and then spread-eagled her. Kendrar sat on Jen's left and Ashley on Jen's right, each pulling on one arm and one leg, spreading her out for Refaeli who crawled up between Jen's wide-spread legs, purring happily as she crawled up her belly to lay down on top of her. From there, it was a foregone conclusion as Bar snuffed out the last resistance with her oft-underrated-but JMD worthy weapons of massive distraction.

Then they turned their attention to Theron who was pinned under several Odds & Ends women after they'd disposed of their adversaries. Apparently, Teri Hatcher had tried to help Charlize, but by then Catherine Zeta Jones had dealt with Janet Jones and she ambushed Hatcher just as she was reaching for Lima's long hair. Zeta Jones made quick work of Hatcher, leaving her sprawled next to the other members of the Academy.

Of all the Academy women, only Cat Bell still remained unscathed...but she was already gone...out of her seat, slinking away up the aisle toward the exit...discretion being the better part of valor and all that! Charlize was alone, unprotected, vulnerable. Fans, this is going to be CLASSIC!!

Adriana grabbed a handful of Charlize's golden curls and wrenched her head to the side, then straightened her upright. The once-upon-a-time “Mistress of the Body Saddle” stood, swaying unsteadily on long, wiry, legs; reeling to and fro while Adriana's evil minions crowded in around her; their possessive hands groping, grasping, pinching, pawing...taking advantage of a lovely young blonde “Goddess” who'd been brought down by circumstance...and the brutal fists of a gorgeous brunette!

Kelly took Charlize's left wrist, Clair her right. Mickie stood at her left hip, her right hand on Charlize's left buttock; Sarah pressed her left thigh against Theron's right hip, her left hand cupping the curve of the blonde's right butt cheek. Kendra stood in front her, her groin so close to Theron's face, Charlize could almost smell her arousal.

Ashley, Christina and Emmanuelle lifted the saddle into position, then lowered it soooo slowly onto Charlize's back...just to extend and magnify the moment of maximum humiliation. Lima laughed as she saw Theron's body twitch, an involuntary reaction to the weight of the butter soft, luxuriant, hand-rubbed, tooled, leather saddle on her back.

“You were always so smug, so haughty, so full of yourself,” Catherine The Magnificent, purred as she ran her hand slowly over Theron's pale flesh. “So certain you were unbeatable, untouchable.” She gave Theron's tender, sensitive, side-boob a quick pinch and Charlize couldn't help letting out a quick yelp of pain. “So invulnerable. Well, my darling, tonight you learn the truth. There's no magic potion; no spell; no incantation; nothing to turn back the clock. You've gotten old, my darling, just like your Pussycat. We're going to ride you...not just Adriana, she's just going to be number one. No, it's going to be all of us...each and every one of the women who've shown up to bask in your moment of ultimate humiliation,” Catherine sighed, the sound almost orgasmic in its tenor.

“Oh, and don't think your so-called 'fans' are going to charge the ring and overpower us to rescue you. Oh no, quite the contrary. You see, we're going to give each and every one in the audience tonight a ride on 'Pony Girl Theron'. And you know what else? Everyone who takes a ride on our sad, sway-backed old 'Golden Burro' will get a signed and numbered certificate saying they 'rode and Oscar-winning actress' … so at least once in their sorry, sad, little lives, they were better than you. And guess who's going to be the second one – after Adriana – to take a ride on you?”

Charlize didn't respond to the bloviating brunette and just bit her tongue; for once she said nothing that would make her situation worse than it already was. But that didn't mean it wouldn't get worse!

Adriana closely supervised the saddling ritual, even going so far as to run her fingers under each and every strap – including the groin strap – making sure each and every one was not only as tight as possible, but that it ran across all the most sensitive areas of Theron's notoriously sensitive body. Only when she was satisfied did Lima mount up and, taking the riding crop from Carlson, she whipped Charlize into a trot, digging her heels into the blonde's flanks, spurring her (figuratively) until she was “up to speed”. After only two circuits of the ring, Adriana slithered down Theron's butt and stood to accept with raised arms, the accolades of the crowd.

Then each and every one of the Odds & Ends girls mounted up, and applying generous crop, took their two circuits of the ring. By the time all ten of Lima's supporters had completed their ride, Charlize was panting and breathing hard. But when she looked up, her heart sank for lined up at the stairs in her own corner of the ring stood (just about) every woman who had been in the audience. They were all signing in, making sure their name would be correctly spelled on the certificates that Catherine The Malignant had promised to everyone who “went for a ride on the good ship Theron”.

An hour later, Charlize was barely able to stay on all fours after carrying more than a hundred women around the ring, some of them felt like they must have been grossly overweight, although by then she was too exhausted to bother to look back over her shoulder.

Two hours into the humiliating performance, even a couple of the Odds & Ends girls had faded away, although Carlson, James, Holt and, of course, Catherine Zeta Jones were all still hanging round to help Lima grind her superiority into Charlize. Then Charlize heard a familiar voice say, “I'm sorry. They're making me....” Cat Bell had been tracked down, overpowered (so she claimed) and brought back handcuffed to the arena by Refaeli and Vaugier. Now, after everyone else had gotten a 'free ride on an Oscar-winning whiner' it was going to be Cat “the great deceiver” Bell's turn.

To be fair, Cat herself didn't use the riding crop on Charlize's bottom...although Zeta Jones walked alongside them as Charlize struggled to carry her (no longer svelt) teammate around the ring, giving Theron's now rosy red backside an unending tattoo with the leather crop. When Cat finally got off of her back, Charlize collapsed flat on the mat and lay sobbing and sweating – no matter how much they yelled and screamed at her or smacked her with the riding crop.

Finally, the Odds & Ends women wandered off to their “after party” where they celebrated crushing the Academy women and taking Charlize's cherished “Mistress of the Body Saddle” crown away from her.

A week later, Charlize was still not speaking to Bell, but she had recovered enough to start talking about “taking back” the Body Saddle mantle...although only in hushed tones and never to anyone outside the stable. Even so, someone (Bell?) leaked it to TMZ and reports began to appear in the media about “talks being underway between Lima's camp and Theron's people”. Reports that were immediately dismissed as “gossip” by The Academy although Odds & Ends would only reply with a standard “we don't talk about on-going negotiations”.

THE END (Of Theron? Of Body Saddle Fights? Of Bell? Or is there still more to this story?)