BOXING ON THE BEACH

Posted by Simguy on 3/29/2003, 6:09 pm.

Before: Miller taking an equity stake in B.O.B.—realizing the venue could be an important adjunct to their commitment to catfight-assisted marketing. Prefight conferences routinely break down into obligatory shirt-ripping, tackling, scratching free-for-alls, assuring a bigger than normal gate for a Beach bout. Crowd’s into it—“Tastes Great” and “Less Filling” banners, blue and gold tshirts—audience split right down the middle in allegiance to either girl. First of a projected best-of-three series between these two—both eager to broaden their rivalry as car-brawling thus far proving indecisive. “The beach is definitely not big enough for the two of us,” purrs Tanya in prefight. “Kitana’s going home.” Kitana in black string-strap bra and panties, Tanya in leopard print bra, red panties. Outdoor ring, beach n’ bleach3ers set up.

During R1: Both girls showing the catfighter’s disdain for defence—flat footed strong stances, low hands, both girls leaning in with their chests out, chins up, pulling in haymakers from the hips in crowd pleasing give-and-take. Tanya takes a clocking right hand upside the head, slings an underhand right to sleek brunette gut, following it up with a clanging hook on the jaw. Kitana rocked, twists her hips and sweeps the left across Ballinger’s robust jugs, drawing a shocked look of outrage, back and forth like this—both girls right there for the other—Tanya maybe getting the better of spirited trade.

R2: Kitana’s seen enough—she wades into Tanya and lays down one of the most brutal, one sided shellackings the beach has ever seen. Bake not efficient, but she’s very heavy handed, rotating her hips, chest, shoulders into wide slinging blows and landing with crushing spank on her opponent. Rights to the pit of the belly set up clouting lefts across stunned blonde jaw. Walloping overhand rights catch Tnya looking, sending her reeling in shook. Awful, churning wide lefts and crashing rights up the middle ragdoll Tanya along the ropes. It’s just brunette trashing blonde from corner to corner, hounding and pounding her girl into knock-kneed stupor. At the bell—Kitana’s chest HEAVING as she gasps for breath, eyes stupid with hate as the ref pushes her back—Tonya battered, staring, sagging in the ropes, Scored 10-8 without a knockdown as blonde gets sent to her corner shabby.

R3: Kitana punched out—Tanya’s turn! Vindictive blonde stunning her foe early as both pitch right hands—Baker stepping in fence post holes all wobbly butt as Tanya palms up on the inner elbows and walks groggy Kitty to ropes. Blonde snarling, banging wide left/rights off the hips and flanks of her foe as Kitana droops forward at the waist. head behind her gloves. Kitana reaching under Tonya’s arms for exhausted clinches—blonde writhing and shoving her way clear, jamming Kitty back hard into the ropes. Ballinger gets all she wants to massive jugs, belting them with saucy lefts and rights as the brunette’s guard wilts under punishment. Tanya working to the bell, swinging away wide, getting her hips into it—Kitana all covered up, shuddering as gloves bash away at her upperback and shoulders.

R4: Exhausted beauties fall in, heartless mauling, lacing, wrestling ensues. Both warned for excessive cheapness: pushing the opponent into the ropes with a forearm at the throat. Head-grinding in close, wedging in no-nos south of the border while smothering the opponent—on and on. Girls shining up under the punishment, but they keep wading into each other. Kitana separates herself late as she emerges from a clinch, pushing her girl to a seat on the ropes, then going at her with lanky, galloping left/rights to the ribs and jugs at the bell, Tanya mouth open—complaining to the ref, but nobody’s hands are clean in this one.

R5: Booming looping right on the ear sends Tanya staggering sideways—Kitana turning with her, sweeping in another right, then another as blonder tries half-heartedly to duck. Action slows as Ballinger clinches o clear her head, getting the referee’s break. Soggy action thereafter—Kitana looking to be the aggressor, baring her teeth as she walks her foe down—but Tanya clinching around the body, spinning her girl, tieing her up against the ropes won’t cooperate. Kitana bitterly telling Tanya to :quit grabbing and fight”—Ballinger resting her cheek on the girl’s shoulder until ref enforces the break.

R6: Kitana’s the stronger vixen now—Tanya melting around the ring, shying away from brunette’s brawny swings—blonde’s on the run. Kitana scoring to the body and ear with wide swinging rights, often falling in to body Tonya to the ropes, then pushing her way up off the blonde to churn punches. Tanya feebly trying to tie up the brunettes arms, but it’s not working—Kit pushing for a little room, dipping her shoulders then galloping to the blonde’s straining belly and gorgeous melons with licking lefts and rights, Tanya staggery, rubber-legged—she’s shot, unable to clinch, not punching back and KITANA PILES IT ON! Brunette sensing collapse, keeps lathering away, lifting her mitts up into curling spanks tummy and jug, tummy and jug, teeing off on Tanya’s face whenever the blonde droops too far forward. With Ballinger shipping leather, helpless in the ropes, the ref FINALLY steps in to end the carnage. Kitana Baker bounces away the TKO6 winner.

After: Can’t wipe the smile off Kitana’s bruised face—the sight of Tanya in total collapse at the ropes all the brunette could have asked for. “I knew I was too strong for her,” around here. You’re looking at the next queen of the beach!” Ballinger weepy and shook up, badly beaten in rounds 2 and 6—she soaked up enough power punches for 3 fights. Crowd wildly enthusiastic about the hands-low, face-first aggression and heartless disregard both women showed the opponent—these girls are born beach fighters.

Reposted by Archer 12/25/09.