"COUGAR BOXING AFTER DARK"
Posted by Lookout! Boxing & Vassago on May 24, 2015, 9:05 am
Cougar Boxing After Dark
Geri Halliwell (14-10-1, 10 KO) vs Shakira (18-23-1, 13 KO)
(Lioness Club vs Hour Glass Fitness)
Results: Lookout! Boxing / Story: Vassago
BEFORE: Geri Halliwell opened a new chapter in her life just few weeks ago when she married Red Bull Racing team principal but what's perhaps more important, she still wants to make her name in the celebrity boxing scene especially after growing really jealous over the ANZAC Day Special where Kylie Minogue and Victoria Beckham battled it out to a packed audience. Geri's believes she's actually the top music cougar these days and would like to challenge Kylie soon however first she targets the equally impressive 'Queen of the Hips', Shakira who's been out of regular action for a while too despite having all the Latin temper in her to remain in the spotlight.
Perhaps the family life has driven Shakira into semi-retirement recently but she still gets really upset over being called a 'WAG' because she made her name long before marrying FC Barcelona's Gerard Pique and even the US audience isn't that ignorant to have no clue about the world's most famous soccer franchise. Regardless of the background, both these singers want to prove they've still got and prolongue their boxing careers for just a little longer.
Geri Halliwell wears a yellow bikini set and black gloves. Strawberry blonde hair tied in a loose ponytail. Shakira wears a crimson bikini set and silver gloves. Curly blonde hair tied in a loose bum at the back of her head. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds in the flyweight division.
Round 1:
Both women take their time early on and settle into single hand exchange before Shakira makes her dancer legs & hips count better and makes the English redhead miss her efforts while countering over the top and smacking measured jabs into the face. Geri refuses to yield an inch and swings vigorously around the Colombian's head but fails to match her agility and becomes too erratic to even graze the flesh down the stretch as Shakira ups the tempo and charges with batting jabs to the body before bumping the redhead off into an earmuff cover. Geri tries to escape to the side but gets whacked around the elbows and backed into the ropes come the final minute with Shakira's high energy assault proving too hot to handle; Shakira keeps pounding away at the ribcage in th dying seconds and makes Halliwell look really sluggish already albeit no real damage has been inflicted either and Geri gives the younger singer a really ill-tempered stare at the bell.
Round 2:
Shakira's keen to resume her fast tempo approach but as she squares up to the redhead, Geri clubs her with a hard right on the nose and follows up with an equally rough left on the temple that drops the blonde's arms and wobbles her on the spot. Shakira might have the speed advantage but that's a real power shot from the English singer who jumps into jabbing frenzy making the most of Colombian's ragged stance. She whips more leather on the face and snaps the blonde ponytail around as Shakira sinks on her knees and is unable to break free. Halliwell bumps her off towards the ropes and switches into pounding her navel as the blonde begins to squeal and just hangs on for the bell with Geri showing some core strenght to neglect the high tempo struggles of the opening round.
Round 3:
Shakira's felt some of these Halliwell punches really good and drops her aggressive approach with the redhead storming out of her stool and jumping into another leather frenzy to scare the blonde off into mid distance. However the avoidance circles fire back into the blonde's face as she almost stumbles over in a hectic beckpedalling routine and falls into a piercing series that smacks her mitts aside and leaves Geri thumping her face back & forth again. It's all about pure venom now as Geri unloads heavy artillery and buries the Colombian under more punches and pounds her back to the ropes where she shrugs off the clinching attempts and switches on the midriff again. Shakira begins to yelp in discomfort quickly and is unable to work the counter effort as Geri chops her ribcage in full swing and bends the hapless blonde forward into a quick uppercut that dissects the guard one more time and whips Shakira against the ropes with a painful shriek. This only fuels Halliwell's determination and she pummels the younger singer back & forth for remainder of the round with Shakira sagging on soft knees come the bell and shaking her head in disgust as Geri threatens to punch her into marshmellows before too long.
Round 4:
The Colombian finds some fancy footwork early in the fourth and avoids immediate trouble but Halliwell's in the zone now and hassles the blonde all over the ring and doesn't show any signs of fatigue at all which surprises one or two experts in the crowd. The sheer strenght of punches is on the redhead's side too and when she finally traps Shakira with a clubbing overhand on the eye, she resumes that facial barrage and snaps the blonde's head back with Shakira forced to brawl it out despite getting roughed up badly in the proccess. Both women trade vicious leather for best part of a minute and allthough Geri earns herself a fat lip after a solid cross hooking combo from the Colombian, she scores the biggest punch of the duell and gives her foe a nasty shiner under the right eye that staggers a yelping blonde in the final minute and allows Halliwell to send more unanswered punches from there on. Shakira gets pounded back to the ropes and soaks up more midsection punishment in the dying seconds as the English vixen just harpoons her around the elbows and makes her cry out in pain at the bell hugging sore ribs in the proccess. The English rout continues and Kylie Minogue should really be worried now!
Round 5:
Shakira struggles to embrace all that pounding she suffered in the last few minutes and rises from her stool to only feature as a punching dummy with Geri blasting her across the mouth seconds into the fifth and working vicious facial assault afterwards. The Colombian tries to keep her gloves in tact but offers nothing back now and sinks into a desperate earmuff as she wobbles back & forth on her feet, the agility and movements are all gone and Halliwell cripples her with more harpoons to the liver on the minute mark and signs off the beatdown with a heavy uppercut on the chin that shuts Shakira's eyes and MAKES HER SLIDE ON HER KNEES to collapse flat on her face moments later... That puts the icing on the cake and referee doesn't even bother with the count! KO5 Geri Halliwell!!!
AFTER: Most of the CW & Disney brats would be proud of this performance allthough one can only wonder if Halliwell has enough stamina in her to last the distance these days. She made short work of Shakira in the end as the Colombian singer tailed off big time ever since the third round and helped a lot in making Geri's US comeback look so convincing. Indeed, she needs to be carried off the ring by a couple of bodyguards and looks in terrible shape having been pounded out of her senses by a fellow cougar.
Meanwhile the Kylie Minogue pouncing is definitely on as Geri calls the Australian blonde out during post-fight speech and wants to make this fight happen as quickly as possible! If total newcomers like Ellie Goulding can book themselves a place at the Asylum PPV despite lack of management then who's gonna prevent the most glamorous UK redhead of the 90s from more outings? Geri's as mean & eager to compete as she was 15 years ago and has no plans to retire anytime soon.
Final result: Geri Halliwell def. Shakira KO5.
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